After the Bombs Fall
by Agnes Robinson
Summary: AU Sequel to A Life That Matters. Sybil's life starting in 1929. The world is in the throws of change as are the lives of the Crawley family. Set in London, Downton and Ireland. Story of one son's romance added at the end in two parts.
1. A Bad Feeling

A Bad Feeling

Tom Branson entered the door of the London home he shared with his wife and three children took off his coat and hat and headed for the kitchen to get a drink of water. It was early July 1929 and it had been a long day at the British Parliament. His job as press secretary to the Labor Party kept him busy with long hours and meetings to discuss Party policy on any new developments. Today's session had created uproar and he was sure the international press would be full of it. Normally Parliament would be adjourned for July, but this year the financial upheaval of the Hatry Affair had changed matters. When he entered the kitchen he found his wife, Sybil preparing a salad for part of their evening meal.

"You look tired," Sybil commented as he dropped a kiss on her cheek before he went to fill a glass with water.

"It was a long day," he replied with a sigh. "That fool Lord Snowden from the securities exchange made a statement today that could have some dire consequences. Parliament is in an uproar and the press is on it like a pack of wolves."

"What did he say?" Sybil inquired.

"He equated the New York stock exchange with "a perfect orgy of speculation". With the Hatry Affair breaking last month, I think things are only going to get worse. We can release all the statements we like. I don't think they'll do much good. The country is headed for hard economic times. The writing is on the wall."

"I'm just glad my father signed this house over to me before he lost the bulk of Mama's money last year. At least we don't owe anything."

"No, we don't. Which is fortunate. I think you should move your settlement funds though. Don't keep everything in one bank. Just in case."

"You think things are going to get that bad?" Sybil asked with a frown. She had stopped what she was doing and looked directly at Tom.

"I hope not, but moving things around a bit couldn't hurt."

"I'll take care of it tomorrow. The money hasn't been earning any interest this last year or two. I was thinking of keeping some cash in the safe. It's not like I use the safe for my jewels like Granny did," Sybil said with a small frown. "It's time to get the boys from their friends down the street."

"I'll go and I'll take Merilee with me. Where is she?"

"Playing in the garden." Sybil went to the door and called their now six-year-old daughter inside. Merilee flew in the door and launched herself at her father. She was the image of her mother and was every bit the Daddy's girl her mother had been at the same age.

"Look, Da, I found a caterpillar," she said, proudly holding up her prize in front of his nose so that his eyes crossed.

"Lovely, Darlin' and what is his name?"

"Tom."

"That's a funny name for a caterpillar," her father replied with a smile as he carried her to the door. "Where's your hat?"

"Oh, Da," Merilee complained as they headed out to the garden, "I don't like to wear a hat."

Sybil just shook her head. Of their three children Merilee was the most like her father, neither one of them liked to wear a hat and she had her father's tenacity. Riordan the eldest was the thinker and had inherited his parent's love of books, while Jay their middle child was like his mother in personality and his father in looks. Jay's real name was James Thomas but it had quickly got shortened to J.T. and then Jay.

Sybil finished preparing their cold meal and headed to the front of the house to collect the afternoon post. There were three letters waiting for her and she took them to the back garden to read the news from the family.

The first was a letter from her mother saying her parents had settled into the Dower House well. After the loss of the majority of the entail due to a bad investment, her mother had been the most flexible and least concerned. They had managed to retain ownership of the Dower House and the estate but the Abbey was rented as were the lands of the estate to pay creditors. Her mother was making due without servants quite well. She had asked Sybil for advice a number of times on running a house without regular help. Her father had managed to retain enough funds for them to have a housekeeper in twice a week but the splendor and opulence Sybil had been raised with were a thing of the past. The letter included an invitation for Sybil and the children to come for a visit over the summer.

The second letter was from her sister Edith. Edith was perfectly happy married to Sir Anthony Strallen and occupied with the details of running his estate. She mentioned their sister Mary and wondered if Sybil had seen her in London as she had left over a week ago. Sybil strongly suspected Mary and her husband Matthew were having difficulties. Mary had taken the loss of the family fortune the hardest. Every time Sybil had seen her over the last year, she complained bitterly about the lack of servants and had flown off the handle with Sybil when she pointed out they had not had any live in help since Merilee was two years old and their last nursemaid had returned to Ireland. Her attitude and comments towards Sybil's husband had reverted to what they were when they first married. From her mother and Edith's letters Sybil gathered Mary was making more and more trips to London. No one seemed to know where she went or whom she was spending her time with. Sybil felt for Matthew, but it was best she stay out of it.

The third letter was from Rory. Colleen had given birth to their first child, a little girl. They were naming her Kathleen. They had decided to move to Listowel so Rory could be closer to the community hospital. There were now three doctors in the rural area of Ireland where they lived, but Rory was the only certified surgeon available to the hospital. He was going to the Tralee hospital once a week to assist with surgery there as well. Their new place had running water and electricity but they were missing their first place in Ballybunion. One of the local women was staying with them until Colleen was back on her feet. Rory had given in and finally bought a motorcycle to get around, although Colleen didn't care for it much.

Sybil sighed when she read his letter. She was glad for Rory that his life was going well, but she missed him. He had become a big part of their lives and the two of them shared a special bond. The man Rory was now, had little resemblance to the wounded boy she had first met. The last time they had been to visit she had assisted him with two emergency calls and a birth. In some ways he was very like her husband and in other ways they were completely different. They both had easy going personalities with an excess of charm that allowed them to move between and the aristocratic world and a working class one with ease. As well Rory had a drive and determination that rivaled Tom's. Tom was a true city boy whereas Rory loved the country and his menagerie of animals was constantly growing. Tom always looked to the big picture of politics and effecting change on a large scale while Rory was content to put his talent to use to help individuals.

It wasn't long before Tom and the children were back and the children ran in the house to get washed up before their evening meal.

"There's a letter from Rory," Sybil told Tom as they followed the children in the house. "They had a little girl."

"That's good news," Tom replied.

"Mama wrote as well, she'd like us to visit this summer. Do you think you can get anytime off?"

"I should be able to get some time at the beginning of August. Why don't you go up to see your parents with the children? I could come up and join you then we'll go to Ireland and visit the folks."

"That sounds like a fine idea," Sybil replied, placing a quick kiss on the side of his mouth.

"What was that for?"

"For being the best husband I could have ever found," Sybil said slipping her arms around his waist.

"Sorry you kept me waiting for an entire year?" Tom couldn't resist teasing Sybil about her indecision in the early part of their relationship.

"Good things come to those who wait," she replied, before he kissed her.

"Mumm, Da, ewwww," Jay said when he walked in on his parents.

"Are you jealous?" Tom quirked an eyebrow at his son before he grabbed him in his arms and began tickling him. Jay was hanging upside down in his father's grasp and giggling wildly.

"He just needs a few kisses," Sybil said as she placed a loud smacking kiss on her son's stomach.

The next day Sybil headed to the bank where she had an account for her settlement funds and asked to speak to her account manager. After much huffing and puffing on the part of the account manager and questioning Sybil as to why she wished to withdraw five thousand pounds in cash, the account manager finally relented and had Sybil escorted to her car by a bank guard with the money securely in her bag. When she returned to the house she placed the funds in the safe and locked it. The safe hadn't been used in years and had become a favorite plaything of the boys who regularly played cops and robbers with Merilee standing in front of the safe pretending to have been robbed.

That evening once the children were in bed Sybil broached the topic of her settlement with her husband.

"I went to the bank today," she told him while chewing her bottom lip. "I withdrew twenty percent of my money and put it in the safe."

"I just meant that you should diversify it amongst more than one bank. I didn't mean for you to put it under the mattress," Tom said as he was getting ready for bed.

"There was something odd about the account manager. I don't know what exactly. I remember going with my father when I was young to withdraw funds. He never had any problem withdrawing funds like I did today."

"That doesn't sound good, but he could have been giving you problems because you're a woman."

"Perhaps," Sybil said pausing. "After all these years don't you want to know how much I have left from the settlement? It's gained a little from interest over the years. Other than paying for the cars I've never touched it."

"If it makes you happy to tell me then do so. I've never cared about the money, but I do want you protected."

"Alright," Sybil said taking Tom's hand. "I put five thousand in the safe here at the house today." She paused to let her words sink in. "There is just over twenty-one thousand pounds left in my account."

The look on her husband's face was one of pure shock. His mouth dropped open and he moved to sit on the side of the bed.

"I thought it was maybe a few thousand at the most," he gasped out finally. "How much was the original check for?"

"Twenty thousand."

"God Lord. I assume your sister's would have received equivalent amounts?"

Sybil nodded.

"Begging my pardon for saying so, but what did your eldest sister do with that kind of money to be complaining nowadays?"

"I have no idea. I assume she spent it. It wouldn't be hard to do. We don't live the kind of lifestyle she desires."

"No, but we don't live one of abject poverty either. Well, it's neither here nor there. The important thing is that you protect yourself and the children. If you're not happy with the bank then move the funds. If you're content to leave it alone then do so."

"That's just it. I think I want to move it all to the safe here at the house. After I got back today I was thinking of having the combination changed on the safe. Too many people know the present combination or at least they used to. If I have it changed then just you and I would know the combination. Even if the house burned to the ground the safe and it's contents would remain intact. There was something just not right at the bank."

"Sybil, that's a big step. Are you sure?"

"I'm sure," she replied. "I trust you but I don't trust the bank."

"And here all this time I thought you just wanted me for my paycheck," he teased.

"If that's what you want to call it," she replied with a devilish grin as she pushed him onto his back and finished pulling off his clothes.


	2. A Visit with the Crawleys

A Visit with the Crawleys

That summer would always be one Sybil remembered with vivid detail. Merilee would be starting school in the fall and Sybil was planning to resume nursing once all the children were in school. She packed the children and headed to her parent's for an extended visit. Her father was a shadow of his former self. Gone was the proud aristocrat that knew his place in society. The man her father was today was quiet and often withdrawn. Without the structure of the society he had been raised to believe in, he seemed lost and unable to find purpose.

As the train pulled into the Downton station all three children had their faces pressed to the window trying to be the first to see who had come to meet them.

"I see Grandpapa," Riordan exclaimed.

"And Grandmamma," Merilee chimed in.

"Auntie Edith is there too," Jay said not wanting to be left out.

After being cramped up on the train the children didn't want to ride in the car with their Aunt and Grandmother and begged their Grandfather to walk with them back to the house. At times like this Sybil could see her father as he had been as he forgot his recent problems and set off with his grandchildren.

"How have things been?" Sybil inquired of her mother and sister once they had the bags loaded into the car and had set off for the Dower House.

"About the same, although we've all been worried about Mary and Matthew," her mother replied.

"How is Cousin Matthew?" Sybil asked.

"We don't see much of him," Edith replied. "He's busy with work and Mary is forever off in London. Have you seen her in town at all?"

"No, I haven't," Sybil said. "I doubt she would associate with the political circles we're involved with and she certainly hasn't stopped by the house. Evelyn and his wife are out of the country, so we would have no contact through them either." Truthfully Sybil had quite enough of her sister's disparaging comments to her husband the last time she had seen her. After almost twelve years of marriage it was high time her sister got over her issues concerning Tom's former occupation. She had been absolutely vicious when she found out Tom was Viscount Branksome's illegitimate son. Sybil was thoroughly disgusted by Mary's current behavior and didn't want to even hazard a guess as to what she was up to in London.

"She hasn't taken the change of fortune well," Lady Cora said. "I can't help but worry."

"Mary is an adult, Mama," Sybil replied. "She has made her choices and come what may she will have to live with them. Change is part of life."

"Sybil, you sound so harsh," Edith admonished.

"I don't think I'm being harsh," Sybil said. "We've both gone through changes in our lives and learned to deal with them. It's part of growing up. Not everything goes your way all the time."

"Your Grandmother and I spoiled her," Lady Cora said. "Now she's paying the price."

"It's water under the bridge Mama," Sybil replied. "No one knows how their children will turn out. You spoiled all of us. Edith and I are fine."

"No matter how old your children are, you don't stop worrying about them," Lady Cora replied gently. "One day yours will be grown and gone and you'll still worry."

"I suppose your right," Sybil replied. "Right now I'm worried that mine are dragging Papa to the sweet shop."

"It might be good for him," Lady Cora said with a small grin. "He could use a little livening up this last while."

That evening as the children were winding down, Sybil produced a copy of The Railway Children and handed it to her father.

"I picked this up just before we left. I thought you could read it to them," she said.

"I read this to you when it first came out."

"You did. I still think it's lovely."

The next few weeks were full of going fishing, walks in the countryside and picnics. Sybil had run into Colleen's mother in the village and let her know they were heading to Ireland in another week and would be going to see the new baby after visiting Tom's mother in Dublin in case there was anything she wanted to send along. Sybil had wanted to talk to her father alone and finally had the chance one afternoon when the children had gone with her mother to visit Edith. Sybil and her father headed out for a walk through the local countryside.

"Papa, I've been wanting to talk to you," Sybil began tentatively.

"Oh, what about?"

"Tom thinks the country is headed for economic difficulties. Much worse than anything we've seen in the last few years."

"There has been a great deal about the Hatry Affair in the papers."

"It's more than that. Tom's worried and when he's worried there is usually a good reason," Sybil paused. "I don't want you to worry about me or the children. I still have all of my settlement. Tom wouldn't touch it. I've hidden it. If anything happens my family will be well taken care of. Tom and I don't owe any money."

"You think it's going to get as bad as all that."

"Things could. Hopefully they won't. I just want you to know we've protected ourselves as much as we can. If things were to get worse for you and Mama you can always come to us in London. Our lifestyle isn't lavish but it is very comfortable. You'd be very welcome."

"Your husband has agreed to this?"

"Tom has never born you any ill will Papa. He never has."

"I must say for all my reservations when you were first married, he has proven himself to be an exemplary husband and father."

"He has," Sybil said with a smile.

Tom arrived at the beginning of August. Cousin Isobel and Matthew were invited for dinner, as were Edith and Sir Anthony. Everyone tactfully avoided the topic of Matthew's absentee wife.

"My compliments, Lady Cora, this is certainly a lovely meal," Sir Anthony commented.

"I can't take the credit," Lady Cora replied. "Sybil and Tom did the honors."

"I must admit my culinary skills have improved over the years. I enjoy cooking now," Sybil said with a small smile. "I don't know how Tom consumed some of my first attempts."

"I had a few stomach aches," Tom admitted. "It was that or starve."

"You don't have a cook in London?" Sir Anthony inquired.

"We haven't had any help for the last three years," Sybil answered. "The children will all be in school this fall, I'm thinking about returning to work. We might need to hire someone then."

The conversation shifted with Sybil and Isobel discussing options in nursing and the men discussing political issues.

"Sybil tells me you are concerned the economy will decline further," Lord Grantham commented to Tom. "I certainly hope that isn't the case."

"I hope so as well," Tom said. "Things could go either way. I do think it's prudent to protect yourself financially."

"Everyone I've spoken to has been raving about the growth in the American market," Sir Anthony commented.

"I've been hearing the same," Matthew contributed.

"Look at the markets on the continent though," Tom replied. "They're failing at a rapid rate. The full effect of the Hatry Affair hasn't been seen yet. Plus there's a growing level of protectionism in parliament. We have this belief that people in business are essentially honest. Hatry couldn't leave his hand out of the cookie jar. The temptation is just too great when you're dealing with that kind of money. It's probably more widespread than we know. It's going to catch up and when it does we're all going to feel it. It's only a matter of time before the American market declines as well."

"Perhaps. I hate to think of things as so inevitable," Lord Grantham replied.

"It's only my opinion gentlemen. Take it as you wish."

"So what do you think is the best course of action?" Sir Anthony inquired.

"Personally, I've diversified funds among a number of banks so that not everything is held in one place. We live within our means and have avoided debt. I can't tell you what to do. It's completely up to you. Things may continue as they have been for sometime yet."

"Well, yes, caution is never misplaced," said Lord Grantham.

"Yes quite so," Matthew chimed in.

"What are you men discussing?" Lady Cora inquired. "You all look so terribly serious."

"The price of tea in China," Lord Grantham said quickly making light of the situation. The men all chuckled before the conversation shifted.

That evening Matthew asked Tom to walk back to Crawley House with him.

"Have you heard anything of my wife in London?" Matthew inquired once they were well away from the rest of the family. "I suspect she's involved with something inappropriate."

"I've overheard a few rumors. They say she's hanging out with the Prince of Wales' crowd but nothing specific. I haven't told Sybil though."

Matthew sighed.

"I put her on a budget when her father lost everything and dismissed her personal maid. There is no way I could afford that lifestyle. We were happy until last year when Robert got into difficulties."

"Most people can't afford that lifestyle. I've always thought it ridiculous that grown men and women don't dress themselves."

"In a way I wish I'd never heard of Downton and all the rest of it."

"You can't change it. If you want to come to London, you're always welcome with us. I can always put out some discreet inquiries on your behalf."

"That's nice of you to say. My wife hasn't always been the kindest to you."

"You're not your wife. How's your car running?" Tom asked by way of changing the subject.

"A little rough," Matthew said with a self-deprecating laugh. "Like the rest of my life."

"I'll take a look. If anyone asks why I walked back with you, you asked me to come over and take a look at it tonight."

"You're good at side stepping the truth aren't you?"

"I had enough practice while I was courting Sybil to make me a professional. I didn't exactly lie, but I didn't volunteer anything either. Now where have you got the car parked?"


	3. Family Summer

Family Summer

The Bransons left Downton with a large box from Colleen's parents and another from Edith and Sir Anthony for Colleen and Rory. Promises were made to stop on the return trip with news of the new baby and Ireland. Sybil wanted to stock up on provisions direct from the farms in Yorkshire before she returned to London. Sir Anthony had extensive gardens on the estate and was happy to provide them with a few cases of produce to take home after every visit. There had been widespread shortages after the Great War and fresh produce was still often difficult to come by in the city.

They only stopped long enough in Dublin to pick up Tom's mother before the group took the train to Listowel. Sybil had purchased sleeping bags for the children before they left London. They were made of heavy cotton with flannel lining and buttoned up the side. All three children were dying to try them out and had been promised an overnight outdoor adventure in Ireland as long as the weather cooperated. They had been so excited with their sleeping bags they had slept on the floor with them instead of in their beds much to their grandparent's amazement. After two nights Lord Grantham had given in and helped the children build an indoor tent from blankets and sheets while regaling them of tales of his time in the Boer War.

Rory was at the train to meet them and was flabbergasted by the growing pile of luggage the porter was unloading from the luggage car.

"Did you come for a week or are you moving in?" he asked with a worried look.

"We've just brought a few things for the baby," Sybil said after she'd given him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"It looks more like your provisioning an army," he said. "I'll have to go arrange another cart to get it all to the house."

They all piled into the cab Rory had already arranged to get them back to the house. The children didn't want to listen to the adults chatter and pleaded to ride on the horse drawn cart that was bringing the mountain of luggage. Finally their father gave in and gave the boys strict instructions to make sure they held onto their sister so she didn't fall off.

"Oh Da, I'm not a baby," she complained as he lifted her onto the cart.

"You're my baby," he teased as he plunked her on the pile of sleeping bags.

The new house was on the outskirts of the town and had a barn, large garden and pasture out back. There was a great deal of cooing and cawing and passing the baby around after the luggage was moved into the house and the boxes opened to reveal a pile of little girls clothes from Sybil as well as a knit blanket from Colleen's mother and enough provisions from Sir Anthony and Colleen's parents to see them part way through the winter. Each of the children wanted to hold the baby and with some basic instruction got the hang of it quickly.

"Where did Kathy come from?" Merilee suddenly asked.

"She's Colleen and Rory's daughter," Sybil replied calmly.

"But how?" Merilee questioned.

Tom and Sybil exchanged a look. It hadn't occurred to them to explain where babies came from to their children. This was the first time they had been around a baby. Sybil had been raised in Yorkshire and there had been enough farm animals about that it was obvious where babies came from. No one had needed to tell her. Tom had so many Aunts and cousins having babies that he had been present at a birth by the time he was twelve years old. It was not a great mystery.

"I know where babies come from," ten-year-old Riordan volunteered. His face was dead serious.

"You do?" his father questioned.

"Yes, Da. I remember when Merilee arrived. Mumm got really fat and one day she started making these awful noises. You were running around grabbing towels and putting water on the stove. Rory told you to stop panicking. You told Jay and I to stay downstairs. Then the postman came and a while later Rory came to get us to go see our new sister. It was obvious she came in the post. My friend Billy said his mother found his brother in the garden, but I told him I'm quite sure the postman must have dropped him there. "

His face was dead serious. The adults were all trying their best not to laugh.

"How much postage do you think she cost?" Rory asked him. He couldn't resist.

"A great deal," Riordan replied. "Da said babies are an expensive proposition even when you have your own doctor."

Everyone burst out laughing. The children were all mystified and looked at each other quizzically.

"Better watch out you don't open the door to the postman too often Tom," Rory teased him.

"Me? He's been by your door a lot more recently than mine," Tom shot back while whipping the tears from his eyes.

The next day the men had taken the boys out for a fishing trip by horseback and a talk on the birds and the bees. Rory still had Realta as well as a mare for Colleen. When the weather was bad or there was an emergency at a remote farm it still was faster and easier to go by horseback. He'd managed to arrange his schedule so that he had the majority of the time the family was visiting off.

Merilee was quite delighted with the Jersey cow Colleen went out to milk in the morning. She had been perfectly content with her mother's explanation the evening before that babies come from their Mummy's tummy and was so busy asking questions about what Colleen did with the fresh milk she had completely forgotten about her brother's explanation of the day before. Sybil of course had never milked a cow in her life but was equally fascinated with the process of turning the fresh milk into cheese and butter.

Colleen took the previous day's milk out of the cold cellar and replaced it with the fresh milk. She then skimmed off the cream and placed it in a large glass jar, screwed on the lid of the hand-cranked churn and gave it to Merilee to crank at the kitchen table.

"Keep turning the handle and you'll see what happens," she told Merilee.

Merilee started out rapidly turning the crank but after a few minutes started to tire. Her Grandmother took a turn cranking the churn and then gave it back to her as the cream started to thicken.

"Keep turning," Mrs. Branson encouraged her.

"It's butter!" Merilee squealed excitedly.

Colleen took the churn from her, added salt and churned it in. She then put the butter into forms and placed the forms on a tray with a cloth over it before it went into the cellar to harden.

"Did you know butter comes from cows?" Colleen asked Merilee.

"I thought it came from the grocer," Merilee said. "What else are we going to make?"

"How about some cheese? It will take a lot longer than the butter though. Do you think you'd like to stir the pot for me on the stove?"

Merilee was feeling very taken with herself standing on a chair at the stove stirring the large pot of milk as it came to the correct temperature. Her mother was keeping a close eye on her to ensure she didn't burn herself or make a giant mess.

"Don't worry too much. I've been doing this since I was younger than Merilee," Colleen told Sybil.

"My upbringing was so restricted, I wasn't allowed anywhere near the kitchen," Sybil replied. "I used to sneak down to see what was going on from time to time. I would have been in terrible trouble if I had been caught. My governess used to have me walk through the garden and practice starting a conversation at every bush I came to. I'm afraid cooking wasn't part of the routine."

"It serves you well now, with Tom's profession," Mrs. Branson reminded her.

"At least my cooking is improving and there's never been anyone I can't talk to," Sybil replied.

"Unlike my Irish," Colleen said. "I just can't get my tongue around it."

"It took me about four years to be able to carry on a conversation," Sybil said. "I really didn't become fluent until Rory moved to London. We had an Irish nursemaid at the time. I had lots of practice."

"It's no wonder you speak Irish with a slight Dublin accent," Mrs. Branson said.

Colleen checked the temperature of the milk and then added the rennet.

"Don't stop stirring," she instructed Merilee.

"I did something wrong. There's lumps," Merilee exclaimed.

"Those are the curds," Colleen told her. She took the pot off the heat once the whey had gone clear and poured the contents into a bowl lined with cheesecloth, then gathered the cloth and allowed the whey to run out. She placed the cheese on a board covered the ball of cheese with another cloth and placed a cookie tin full of rocks on top.

"To make the cheese go hard the rest of the liquid has to be pressed out," Colleen told her. "By tomorrow we'll have cheese to eat with our lunch."

"What are we going to do with the rest of the milk," Merilee questioned. It was fascinating to her.

"We'll put some of it in sterilized bottles and take it down to the town to a store where I sell it," Colleen told her. "The rest we'll drink."

"Let's go," Merilee said, hopping down from her perch on the chair.

"When Kathy wakes up from her nap," Colleen replied with a laugh.

That afternoon the women walked down to the shops to drop off the milk at a small store that bought the excess milk and eggs from Colleen.

"I'm quite glad Rory gets paid with less livestock since we moved over here and he's at the hospitals more," Colleen told them. "I almost fainted when one man walked into the waiting room at the other place with a pig on a lead."

"Oh no. What did you do?" Sybil said with a laugh.

"I quickly led it out to the back and put it the shed. Then got back to the waiting room as quick as I could and opened all the windows to let the smell out," Colleen said with a giggle. "We traded it and twenty-five chickens the next day for the cow. It took me weeks to scrub the stink out of the waiting room."

The women all had a good laugh at some of the more peculiar items Rory had been given for his medical services as a country doctor. When they got back to the house, the men and boys were waiting for them. They had a bunch of fish cleaned and ready to cook for dinner and had taken the boys swimming at a local stream. By the time supper was done the children were nodding off over their plates and didn't protest when they were put to bed in their sleeping bags on the sitting room carpet.

The next day there was a country race and Rory entered Realta.

"He's going to break his neck," Mrs. Branson said as she saw them fly past.

"He loves it," Colleen said with a smile.

The entire family was screaming and cheering for Rory to win. Sybil was hoarse from cheering by the time Rory crossed the finish line in second place.

"Your slowing down," Tom said when Rory came riding back over.

"More like the horse isn't getting enough exercise," Rory replied. "I beat O'Maley last time. I almost had him this year as well."

"Maybe your just getting fat from too much married life," Sybil teased Rory. "You used to be so skinny."

"And so did you," he shot back with a laugh before he got a smack on the arm from her.

They headed over for refreshments. Rory stayed back with Realta as the horse still had a knack for getting into things and loved to try out any human food that came within sight. Tom was distracted talking to one of the local men and wasn't fast enough to stop Merilee from pushing cookies into the horse's mouth as fast as the previous one disappeared.

"Merilee, don't feed cookies to Rory's horse," Tom scolded.

"Why not, Da?" she questioned.

Tom had no real idea why so said the first thing that popped into his mind.

"Because he'll get a toothache and have to go to the dentist."

The adults had to cover their mouths to hide their smirks, but it seemed to satisfy Merilee's perpetual questions for the time being.

The rest of their time in Ireland was filled up with trips to the beach and the promised overnight campout. Sybil took the opportunity to discuss her plans of going back to work as a nurse with Rory as she had not been working for just over three years and was feeling out of the loop with the latest developments in the medical profession.

"There is definitely a shortage of surgical nurses here in Ireland," Rory commented. "I attend clinics twice a year in Dublin to stay abreast of the new techniques and it's been an issue at every clinic I've been to. More and more hospitals are requiring specialized training."

"I'll have to think it over," Sybil said. "I'd like to get something with more regular hours so I can be home with the children in the evenings."

"It might be the answer. Other than emergencies most surgical wards have set hours for operations. I prefer it. It's hard work and it's tiring but the hours and pay are more regular."

"You mean you don't miss having pigs in your waiting room," Sybil couldn't help it and started to giggle.

"Colleen told you about that did she?" Rory started to laugh. "That wasn't the worst. The worst was the woman that showed up with a live goose with a string around its neck for a lead. It started biting the other patients."

"Well, you can't say you've had a dull practice," Sybil said with a laugh.

"No, it hasn't been that."

Before they left Rory gave Tom a box of hand tied fishing flies to give to Sybil's father on their way back to London. The children had been so taken with Rory and Colleen's dog that Sybil decided to discuss the possibility of getting a dog with Tom when they got home.

"It was a lovely trip," Sybil told her husband as they boarded the ferry back to England. "I'm very glad you suggested it."

"Someday we'll move back," Tom said. "Maybe when the children are grown."

"I think I'd like that," Sybil replied.


	4. The Question of Mary

The Question of Mary

As soon as Sybil was back in London she went around to two of the hospitals to inquire about nursing positions. Rory's assessment of the shortage of surgical nurses was indeed correct. Both hospitals were interested in offering Sybil staff nursing positions but only as a shift worker. Surgical nurses did in fact have set hours but required additional training. Sybil thanked them for their time and headed straight for the closest nursing school. Since she had her resume and copies of her previous training documents with her, she was able to fill out a course application that afternoon.

When she returned to the house she headed to the neighbors where the children were spending the day to let them know she was home and then collected the post. There was a letter from Matthew saying he would be in London the following week and would like to take Tom up on his offer of a place to stay.

Sybil wrote out a return note to Matthew letting him know that they would be expecting him and asking him to relay to his mother her news about taking the specialized nursing course starting in two weeks. She kept the tone of her letter casual and tactfully didn't include any mention of her sister as Matthew had not included her name in the salutation. After she took her letter to the post box she headed upstairs to air out a bedroom and make sure the linens were fresh.

Tom arrived home later that afternoon tired from work.

"I hope you don't mind that I invited Matthew to stay with us," he said.

"I don't mind at all," Sybil replied. "I've always liked Cousin Matthew, but I would prefer to stay out of whatever is going on between him and Mary."

"I have a sense he has had enough of her current behavior."

"Why? What did he say to you?"

"Nothing to worry about," Tom said placing a small kiss on Sybil's temple. "I told him what I'd heard around town."

"You've never mentioned anything. What have you heard?"

"A lot of rumors, but nothing substantial. I've heard your sister is hanging about with the Prince of Wales set. I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to worry."

"What is she thinking?" Sybil said taking a chair and frowning. "That entire group does not have the best of reputations."

"I don't even know if it is true. I hope for Matthew's sake it isn't. If it is let's hope she hasn't done anything too drastic."

"She's a big girl. It's time she grew up," Sybil said clearly annoyed.

"Let's keep our opinions to ourselves. I'll help Matthew out anyway I can, but whatever comes is between them."

"Agreed," Sybil replied.

As it turned out Matthew postponed his trip to London. After a few telephone calls Tom had managed to find out Mary was staying at Sandringham for a party for the week. Tom had the political and media connections to find out a great deal more about what Lady Mary Crawley was up to but wisely chose to stay as well away from it as possible while helping Matthew out. The last thing he needed was for Mary to make amends with her husband and parents and he wind up on the wrong side of his in-laws yet again. As well his position was high enough in the Labor Party that he didn't want any conflict of interest or rumors starting as to why he was looking into Lady Mary's whereabouts. He had been extremely discreet in finding out what he had so far.

Matthew telephoned to say he would be arriving during the first week of September. Sybil had a woman hired to come in through the day to make sure the children got to and from school, take care of some of the housework and have the evening meal started before she got home. Her course would last ten weeks and wrap up mid-November. She let Matthew know he would be on his own through the day but he was more than welcome to stay.

The second afternoon of Matthew's visit there was a knock at the front door. Tom was home early that day and went to answer it. Mary stood on the step looking as imperious as ever and dressed in the latest fashion.

"I had a note my husband is here and wanted to see me," she informed Tom. She didn't bother with any pleasantries.

"Lady Mary, what a surprise," Tom said. "Matthew and I are just in the library. Let me show you through."

He showed Mary to the library and quickly headed downstairs to ask the housekeeper to take the children to the park for an hour or so directly after school. He gave her some money to take them for a bun at their favorite local bakeshop as well.

"My sister-in-law is here, I would prefer they avoid any unpleasantness," he said as way of explanation.

"Very well Mr. Branson," she said. "I'll plan to have the children back around four thirty. I'm afraid I'll be putting the dinner into the oven a bit late in that case."

"I should be able to take care of putting the meal on at four," Tom replied as she got her coat and headed out the door to collect the children.

By the time Tom headed back up the stairs he could hear loud voices coming from the library. He turned around and headed back down to the kitchen to make a fresh cup of tea and wait out Mary's visit.

"Mary," Matthew said when she entered the library.

"Hello, Matthew, I received your note," she said while taking off her hat and gloves. "What did you want to see me about?"

"Mary, you're my wife. What did you think I want to see you about? I want you to stop whatever you are up to here in London and come home before you've damaged our relationship and your reputation beyond repair, if you haven't already."

'"Unlike you I'm taking care of family business."

"Exactly how are you doing that, by associating yourself with a group of aristocratic playboys and making yourself notorious?"

"I'm using my connections to find a way to restore the family fortune. I have five thousand of my settlement left. I intend to turn it into a substantially larger amount."

"The only way to do that is through hard work, not by following the whims of a bunch of spoiled aristocrats that have never done a day's work in their lives. Are you sleeping with one of them and hoping they will give you enough for your _favors _that you won't have to think about money ever again?"

Mary's glare turned to ice as she slapped him across the face.

"Don't you ever dare speak to me like that!"

"I will speak to you how I please," Matthew said, his voice rising. "It's high time you grew up and stopped acting like a spoiled, selfish, over privileged bitch."

"You've never been on my family's side," Mary screamed back. "You don't care about what has been taken away from us. You're content to spend you days shuffling papers in some dusty office while the rest of us suffer."

"No one is suffering except in your mind. Not having someone to buckle your shoes for you isn't suffering. Your sisters are both leading happy normal lives. Your parents have accepted the situation and are getting on with things. The only one that hasn't accepted things is you."

"I always knew you were too common to understand," Mary shot back.

"Don't you even go there," Matthew said shaking his head at her.

"You have no sense of pride," Mary glared at him angrily.

"I have plenty of pride and I'm bending it enough to allow myself to take my wife back who I strongly suspect has been using hers in the Prince of Wales bedroom, or are you back with Carlisle?"

"I've had quite enough of this," Mary said as she started to move towards the door.

"You have two weeks to be back in Yorkshire and resume living in our house," Matthew informed her. "If you're not back by then, don't bother coming back."

He moved to hold the door open for her to leave.

"Why was I ever foolish enough to tie myself to you," Mary said as a parting barb and not wanting Matthew to have the last word.

"Funny, I've been asking myself the same question," Matthew said as he slammed the front door hitting her slightly in the rear end on the way out. A startled squeak erupted from Mary as the door boosted her onto the front step.

Tom made his way upstairs after a few minutes once he heard the door slam to find Matthew sitting in the library staring off into space. Tom set down the two glasses he was carrying on the desk and went to move some books to produce the bottle of Irish whiskey he kept on a top shelf out of the reach of the children. He handed a glass to Matthew. He refilled it once Matthew had downed the shot. He put the cap back on the bottle and quickly replaced it on the shelf when he heard a key in the front door.

"To getting a few answers," Tom said.

Matthew's only answer was a rueful half grimace.

"Where is everyone?" Sybil asked as she came in from school and kissed her husband on the cheek.

"I sent the children to the park with Marjory," Tom replied. "Matthew and I will be going out after dinner."

"That's fine, I have to study anyway," Sybil said. "Good Afternoon Matthew. Are you feeling quite well? You look rather flushed."

"It's probably the whiskey," Tom said while attempting to steer Sybil towards the downstairs.

"Oh Tom you shouldn't be feeding that stuff to anyone on an empty stomach."

"It's one of those days when it seemed like a good idea," he replied.

"Probably one of the better ones I've had today," Matthew said as he unsteadily pushed himself to his feet. "I think I'll go out back for a breath of air. If you'll excuse me."

He wobbled to the back door and went out into the garden. Sybil went to look out the window to see Matthew slumped over on one of the benches in the back yard.

"What really happened today?" she demanded.

"Hurricane Mary showed up, rained on his parade and left with a bang." Tom said before he went out to get Matthew back into the house and into bed to sleep it off.


	5. When the Bow Breaks

When the Bow Breaks

A loud ringing woke Sybil from her sleep on October 30, 1929. She reached for her alarm clock only to realize it wasn't the culprit. Coming awake she shook her husband's shoulder to get him to run down and answer the telephone. Once she had clicked on a light and looked at the clock it was two forty-five in the morning. She got up, put on her house coat and slippers to head down and find out who was phoning at this hour of the morning.

She met Tom on the stairs heading back up.

"I've got to go into work," he said. "They've just closed the stock market in New York. It's crashed. The banks in America are failing. There are reports of financiers throwing themselves to their deaths by jumping out of windows in New York and Chicago. We've got to get to work and do damage control before the panic spreads here."

Sybil gasped. Her hand flew to her mouth. She knew Tom had been busy with work this last two days and there had been multiple meetings with the financial analysts at parliament with all the parties. Tom had been putting in long hours but this was beyond what anyone had expected.

"That's terrible, Tom. Don't worry about anything here. I'll get ahold of Marjory and have her come over early. I'm going to call Edith and Anthony," she said. "I don't want Papa picking up the paper this morning and reading this on the front page. Mama will be worried about her family in America as well."

Tom gave her a quick nod. Before he headed upstairs to get dressed and head into work. Sybil headed to the kitchen to make Tom some sandwiches to take along as she had a feeling he would not be stopping for lunch or returning home until late that evening. She made it back upstairs just as the car that had been sent to pick her husband up pulled up to the door. He ran down the stairs still straightening his tie, dropped a quick kiss on her mouth, grabbed his brief case and the sandwiches and was gone.

Sybil headed back up and decided to try for another hour of sleep before she made her phone calls. After twenty minutes of tossing and turning she gave up and went to make herself a hot drink before she started making calls.

"Hello, Sir Anthony here," came a very groggy voice once Sybil managed to get through.

When she told him the news there was stunned silence on the other end of the line.

"Anthony are you still there?" Sybil inquired.

"Yes, yes, it's quite shocking."

"I thought perhaps you or Edith could go over to our parents. I don't want Papa reading this on the front page of the Times over breakfast."

"I'll call Matthew to come along as well," Sir Anthony replied. "We can have a confab so to speak."

"I don't know how much there will be to discuss," Sybil said. "It's only happened within the last few hours. Thank you for taking care of things."

"Thank you for calling to let us know. It would be a terrible shock to read in the paper over breakfast."

"Please call and let me know how things are going," Sybil requested.

"Of course, until later. Goodbye."

"Goodbye, Anthony."

Sybil set the phone down slowly. She was glad to have spoken to Anthony. He was like a rock that never seemed to change. When she was younger she had thought him frightfully dull, but at times like this she was gratefully for his steadying presence and reliability. She was just hoping against hope that her parent's finances wouldn't worsen.

Sybil called Marjory next to let her know there was an emergency that Tom had been called away to and asked her to come in early. Normally they were able to get the children up and ready for school in the mornings between the two of them with Marjory arriving in time to walk the children to their school.

The rest of the early morning Sybil set about doing the few dishes and catching up on some housework before it was time to get the children up. When Marjory arrived she explained to her briefly what was going on.

"Oh my, Mrs. Branson, what will it mean here in England."

"I don't know," Sybil replied. "I would suggest though that you go by your bank and check on things. Withdraw enough to pay your next month's rent and expenses just incase. I'm planning to do the same on my break at college. If Mr. Branson phones while I'm out, please call the college and have them find me."

That day on her break Sybil walked to their bank. She passed two banks where crowds had gathered and were pounding on the doors. She stopped at the first one and asked a well-dressed man on the side of the crowd what was going on.

"They've closed their doors and locked them. There are signs closed until further notice."

"Thank you," she said before she hurried down the street to the bank she was headed for. Luckily it was still in business. There were long lines at the tellers and people were complaining loudly. The bank manager stepped out into the middle of the reception area after a few minutes and stood on a chair to make an announcement.

"You're attention please, ladies and gentlemen. The bank will only be allowing a withdrawal of a maximum of one hundred pounds a month per customer until further notice." There was a loud uproar throughout the room. He held up his hands for quiet. "At the present time this institution is in no danger of failing. With your continued patronage it will continue to function, thank you."

After the announcement the crowd thinned slightly and Sybil was able to get to the teller and withdraw fifty pounds.

"Thank you, Mrs. Branson," the frazzled man behind the desk said.

"Good luck," she said quietly before she left the window.

She returned late to class to find over half the class missing. The instructors decided to suspend class for the rest of the day to allow everyone to attend to their personal affairs. Sybil returned home to find Marjory sniffling into a hanky in the kitchen. Marjory was a little older than Sybil and a widow from the Great War. She lived with her sister who had never married.

"What's wrong," Sybil asked her gently.

"Oh Mrs. Branson. I went by the bank like you suggested and it's closed. I don't know what I'm going to do. I have less than two pounds in my handbag. My sister keeps her funds at the same bank. The rent is due in two days. All of my savings and my last widow's check were in the bank. I don't know what I'm going to do."

"First dry your eyes and we'll have something to eat," Sybil said. "Then you can take the rest of the day to contact your sister and discuss the situation. Where does she work?"

"She works at a bake shop."

"Try not to worry too much. I'm sure there are many others in the same situation. You need to get all your facts. You're position here is quite secure."

"Are you sure, Mrs. Branson?"

"Yes, my husband and I will weather the storm. There is no need for concern. Promise me you won't make any decisions before coming back to talk to me."

Marjory nodded before she got up to help Sybil make their lunch.

That afternoon Sybil called her parents. After she talked to her father for a few minutes, she spoke to her mother.

"How are you Mama?"

"We're both fine dear. Matthew is making inquiries today, we should know something tomorrow or the day after."

"Things here are a bit chaotic when you're out. They've suspended classes for the day. Everyone here is fine. Tom is at work, of course."

"Have you heard anything from Mary?" her mother inquired.

Sybil sighed. Matthew had confided in them about his confrontation with Mary and her obsession with money. As far as Sybil knew no one in the family had heard from her since.

"No. I could throttle her for worrying you and Papa."

"We worried about you too when you went to Ireland," her mother reminded her gently.

"I still wrote regularly, Mama, and you knew who I was with."

"You've always been very stubborn, Sybil, but you are a wonderful daughter."

"Thank you, Mama, I have to go for the children in a few minutes. I must go."

When Sybil arrived at the school to wait for the children she spotted the mother of her sons' friend in the crowd. The family was from America and had planned to hold a costume party for their children the next evening to celebrate Halloween. All three children were invited. Sybil went to speak to her.

"I can't see any point in cancelling the children's party," the boy's mother said. "My husband works at the consulate. I don't expect he'll be home tomorrow evening. Would you mind coming over to help with the children? It's just a few games and refreshments. Maybe a ghost story or two."

"I'd be delighted to help out," Sybil said. "I don't expect my husband home either. He works in government."

"Wonderful. We can keep the home fire burning together and amuse the children at the same time."

There was still no word from Tom that evening. Sybil kept the children occupied with going through some old trunks in the attic to look for cloths to make themselves costumes. The boys both made themselves into pirates with old shirts that had frills at the neck and sleeves, wide belts and brightly colored scarves tied around their heads. Merilee found herself an old mask from a ball that could have been a hundred years old or more and a long forgotten old dress, that just needed some pins to make it into a costume. The American children had assured them that most children in their own country made their own costumes.

It was almost midnight before Sybil heard Tom's key in the lock and went down to meet him. He was exhausted and had to be back at work in five hours. Sybil told him a bit about her day while he ate a cold supper.

"Marjory and her sister might loose their lodgings," Sybil told him. "I'm thinking of offering them the housekeeper's accommodations here. It's big enough for two."

"Do as you please, it will all work out," Tom said. "Did you check on the other two banks?"

"No, I didn't have the pass books."

"I'll get them for you on the way up. At least we know a third of our savings are still there and the settlement is safe."

"Mama reminded me today of when we were first married and living in Ireland," Sybil said. "That old life before we were married seems like it was a dream now."

"Maybe we were all dreaming and we just got the wake up call of the century," Tom said as he took Sybil's hand to head upstairs.


	6. Aftermath

Aftermath

The first three days after the collapse were busy ones for Sybil. Tom was at work almost full time and Sybil had to make many of the decisions around the house herself. Marjory had stopped over the next morning to speak to Sybil as she did not regularly work on Saturday. The sister's savings were indeed wiped out and their landlord was demanding the rent for November or they were to be out by the end of the day. Luckily Marjory's sister Rose still had a job. Sybil offered them the use of the housekeeper's quarters and Marjory gratefully accepted.

"I'm afraid Rose will have to contribute financially to the household every month," Sybil said. "We still aren't sure of the state of our own finances and as my husband works in politics his job could easily be in jeopardy as well."

They worked out the finances and Sybil offered to meet Marjory with the car later in the day at the flat to bring back a load of the sister's things. The boys had been invited to help put up decorations for the Halloween party that afternoon and grudgingly took Merilee with them. Sybil quickly made a tour of other two banks to find that one of them had closed their doors. Luckily it had been the bank with the least of their funds and the rest of their savings were safe for now.

Sybil swung by Marjory's flat and met her sister. The women had their bags packed with the items they wanted to keep and were waiting for a used furniture dealer. Once the car was loaded Sybil assured them she would park the car in the garage and they could move their things into the house when they arrived later on. Rose thanked Sybil profusely and assured her she would be only too happy to contribute her help to the cooking and laundry at the house as well as the arrangements her sister had made.

By the time Sybil had gotten the children into their costumes and to the Halloween party she was ready for some fun as well and found herself enjoying the games and activities along with the children, as she had never been to a Halloween celebration before.

On Sunday afternoon Sybil's mother telephoned to tell her Lord Grantham had a slight stroke. Sybil was not to worry. He was resting and the Doctor had been.

"Mama, I wish there was something I could do," Sybil said. "I can't leave the children and I have another two weeks on my course. I can't possibly come up."

"The doctor said he should avoid worry," Lady Cora replied. "There is something you can do. Find Mary and get her to contact us. Your father has been terribly worried about her. I know it's a lot to ask, but if he knew something it would set his mind at ease."

"I'll take care of it Mama," Sybil told her. "Give Papa my love. I can't promise but I'll try to get up for a few days after my course."

After Sybil hung up the phone she headed downstairs to speak to Marjory and her sister to see if they could keep an eye on the children for a few hours while she went out.

"Normally, I wouldn't ask on a Sunday, but I've had some urgent family business come up," Sybil told them. "My husband very seldom works Sundays."

"It's no problem at all, Mrs. Branson," Rose told her. "Goodness knows enough of us have family troubles at the moment. We'll get the dinner ready while you're out and I'll bake some scones and bread for the morning as well."

"Thank you, Rose," Sybil said with a smile.

Sybil didn't want to disturb Tom at work, as he had been completely exhausted both nights when he had gotten back. She decided to pay a few calls to some of the more gossip filled members of the aristocracy and she what she could learn about her sisters whereabouts through them. She got out one of her best dresses and got ready. She took the car as it would make any stops she needed to make faster.

Her first stop was at Cousin Susan's, the Marchioness of Flintshire. Her grandmother had always said her niece was the best-informed woman in all London. Her cousin did know a great deal of the goings on at court and in parliament.

"Father's had a slight stroke," Sybil told her. "Mother has asked me to let Mary know and I didn't want to tell Mama I had accidentally misplaced the address for where Mary was staying. I was hoping you knew, Cousin Susan."

"I do believe she is staying with Lord and Lady Maxwell. At least she was last week. One never knows with all this turbulence these days. I'll give you their London address."

Sybil continued to visit with Cousin Susan for another forty minutes before she was able to take her leave and head over to the Maxwell's.

Lady Maxwell was in and kindly informed her that Lady Mary was now staying with one of "Eddie's" friends.

"Please stay to tea, my husband will be back in a few minutes and he would know exactly. I can never tell one of those women from the other," Lady Maxwell said.

"I can't remember meeting you before Lady Sybil," she continued once the tea was served. "I do remember Lord Grantham having three daughters though."

"I was only in London for my first season before the War broke out," Sybil replied. "I got married before the end of the War and we moved to Dublin for a time right away. There wasn't much time for socializing."

"You live in London now, though?"

"Yes, my husband is in politics and our social calendar is taken up with engagements concerning his occupation."

"I understand completely. Lord Maxwell works at the palace for the King. We're always at court. There are few in our circle that can afford to be idle these days. Here's my husband now, I'm sure he'll know exactly where Lady Mary is."

"She's over with Freddie and William Dudley-Ward," Lord Maxwell proclaimed. "They were all talking of heading up to Balmoral next week, but with this dreadful crisis going on I believe it's been postponed."

"Would you happen to have the address?" Sybil inquired. "My father has been taken ill and my mother is quite desperate to reach my sister."

"Yes, of course," Lord Maxwell replied. He went to his desk and returned with the address. "Now I must take my leave, Ladies. The King is giving a number of speeches tomorrow morning and I must go over them to make sure everything is in order."

"Thank you, ever so much Lord Maxwell."

"Give your father my regards, Lady Sybil."

Sybil was off again with the next address. She decided to return home and send a note round to Mary with a cab rather than attempt to navigate the winding Mayfair streets on her own where Mary was staying. Sybil's face was starting to ache from all the smiling she had done that afternoon. She was quite happy to postpone the inevitable confrontation with her sister for another hour or two at least.

Two hours later a chauffeur driven limousine pulled up at the door of Sybil's home. Her sister stepped up to the door and rang. Riordan opened the door.

"Hello, Aunt Mary. Mum said you might be by tonight. How are you?"

"I'm fine thank you Riordan," Mary replied softening a bit with her nephew. The boy was always so formal and unlike his father in her opinion it made her chuckle. In fact Riordan was very like his father in his love for learning but that fact was completely lost on Mary. Sybil came to join them and invited her sister into the library, which they used as their sitting room.

"Your note said _urgent_," Mary said right away once they were seated. "What is this urgent business you needed me for?"

"Papa had a stroke this morning," Sybil replied.

Mary gasped. Her hands flew to her cheeks.

"How bad is it?" Mary inquired.

"Mama says it was mild," Sybil replied. "He's had too much worry and it's putting strain on his heart. He's worried about you."

"I've been working on rebuilding our family fortune," Mary informed her haughtily.

"And how has that worked out," Sybil replied quietly.

"Not well. I've lost everything. I don't even have the train fare back to Downton. I'm living on the charity of others."

"Honestly Mary, open your eyes. The family fortune and the lavish lifestyle are a thing of the past. No one cares about it anymore. I certainly don't care, Edith doesn't either and our parents have accepted the loss."

"It's easy for you to say. You never did care for propriety."

"Maybe I did more than you know and still do. I'm not the one who is making myself notorious in society and parted from my husband."

"You married the chauffeur!"

"I married the press secretary to the current Prime Minister," Sybil informed her. "I'm sure that would more than satisfy Granny if she were still alive. Stop avoiding the topic. You need to go home."

"I can't. I've made a mess of things as usual."

"They're our parents. Papa needs you right now more than ever. Can't you see your way clear of the selfish world you've made for yourself and take the time to go and see him?"

"If you insist."

"I do insist and I insist you go tonight. I'll drive you to the train myself."

"I couldn't possibly. My things."

"I can't believe you would stay anywhere there wasn't help capable of packing your belongings for you and having them sent over," Sybil replied. She was not about to give her sister an inch to wheedle out of going to see their father.

"And at the other end?" Mary arched an eyebrow at her with a smirk.

"I'll call Edith and have her meet you."

"I see you have this all worked out."

"If you don't go up and make amends with them yourself, I'll go up in two weeks and tell them exactly what you've been up to these last few months. Cousin Susan was quite informative."

Mary paled at her threat.

"What would you have me do about Matthew?"

"That is your own affair. If I were you I would get on my knees and beg him to take you back, but I'm not you."

"Very well then," Mary said with a sniff. "I'll go first thing in the morning."

"No, you'll go tonight," Sybil informed her. "Until your attitude towards my husband has a radical improvement you are not welcome to stay here and I am not driving you back to Mayfair under any circumstances. You can use the telephone in the hall to arrange to have your things sent over."

Mary glared at Sybil but did as she had instructed.

"Now," Sybil said sweetly, "Would you care to join the children and I for dinner or would you prefer to wait here?"


	7. Changing Times

Changing Times

By the spring of 1931 it had become obvious there would be no quick economic recovery from the blanket of economic depression. Wages were dropping and Tom had taken a pay cut a year previously and a second one when the Tory's again became the government in power. As prices soared and wages dropped the two sisters living in the housekeeper's quarters had become a godsend to Sybil. The women were used to living on a budget and had planted vegetables in every existing space in the back garden the previous summer. As Rose's job at the bakeshop dwindled and was finally lost when the shop closed its doors Rose had taken over more and more of the cooking and baking. She now did the family shopping as well and had a keen eye for a bargain. Sybil strongly suspected they were eating and faring much better than many other households along the same street.

At the hospital where Sybil worked there were constantly notices up on the boards for Interns and nurses looking for lodging. One day Sybil had spoken to two fellow co-workers who mentioned the difficulty they were having finding a place to stay. When she returned home, she took a note book and pen and did a survey of the servants' quarters that had not been used in the twelve years she and Tom had lived there except for the few times her mother had come to stay and brought her maids with her. Other than some fresh paint, a good cleaning and fresh linens the rooms were in good order. Her father had put in a servant's washroom with running water before the Great War. She decided to talk to Tom about renting some of the rooms that evening.

"Tom, I had a note today from Edith," she began. "They would like the children to come to Yorkshire to stay with them this summer. Riordan could have a summer job working on Anthony's estate."

"A job doing what?" Tom inquired.

Sir Anthony and Edith had given up the majority of their household staff and were down to a cook and a maid. Luckily for them Sir Anthony had listened to Tom's advice and diversified his funds among banks. He had suffered some losses but the farm was still faring well.

"Working on the farm. You know whatever Riordan does Jay will be right behind him."

"I've been wondering about what to do with them over the summer. They're getting too old to hang around London without something productive to occupy their time. It would probably be good for them and we can go up on weekends. What about Merilee."

"Mama will probably have her practicing her manners and pouring tea," Sybil said with a laugh. "You know what a tomboy she is. It might do her some good."

"There is nothing wrong with her manners," Tom said in defense of his Daddy's girl. "Then again it would give us more time on our own without the children here." He pulled Sybil into his lap in the armchair where he was sitting and started nuzzling her neck.

"Is that all you ever think about?" Sybil said with a slight laugh.

"When your in the room, yes," he replied before he began tickling her.

Sybil shrieked in laughter before she jumped up.

"There was something else I wanted to talk to you about."

"Come back and sit on my lap. I promise I'll listen," Tom said grabbing her hand and pulling her back towards him. Sybil curled up on his lap and he immediately started fiddling with the buttons on her dress.

"I was thinking about opening up more rooms in the house," she said.

"Sybil, things are already tight. With Marjory and Rose here, I don't know how much more we can afford," Tom said. He had stopped trying to seduce her and was looking her in the face.

"I know that. That is why I need you to listen. I'm thinking of letting out some of the old servants' quarters to some of the Interns at the hospital. There is a shortage of affordable accommodation. We could open the morning room as a study room. We use the drawing room for entertaining and holidays anyway. Rose needs a job. She hasn't had any luck finding one and the children are getting older. I don't know how much longer we'll need Marjory. Riordan is more independent now and it won't be long before Jay and Merilee are as well. I looked the rooms over and other than some paint or maybe wall paper they just need cleaning."

Tom thought it over for a minute.

"Your sure you want to do this? It would mean a house full of people."

"I was thinking about when Rory lived with us during his residency. He was so busy with his studies he was hardly here. He came back to get cleaned up, eat and sleep. Otherwise he was at the hospital. We saw more of him because he was family. If we had two or three of the residents from the hospital stay here it would cover more of the costs of running the house and we could do a few repairs we've been putting off."

"I suppose I get to do the painting?"

"You agree then?"

"Yes," he said moving in to kiss her again and slipping his hand under the hem of her skirt.

"We should go talk to Marjory and Rose" Sybil said against his lips with a smile.

"Later," was all Tom said as he finished unbuttoning her dress.

Marjory and Rose had jumped on the idea of fixing up the lower rooms. They had both been worried about what they were going to do once the Branson's children were a bit older and Marjory was no longer needed. With the job shortage their prospects weren't good. They had gone through the rooms with Sybil and Tom and had quite a few suggestions on fixing the rooms up to make them homier so that Sybil would be able to charge a higher rate.

"I had almost forgotten how sterile these rooms are," Tom commented. "My room at the first house I worked at in Ireland reminded me more of a monk's cell than a bedroom. It was freezing."

Tom's working class roots had surprised both sisters. It made them more determined than ever to make over the old servants' quarters into a money earning enterprise. Once the women started discussing curtains and decorations Tom retreated back upstairs. The three women headed up to the attics to see what could be salvaged from the discarded furnishings on hand. By the time Tom and Sybil took the children up to Yorkshire for the summer, the first two lodgers were installed in the downstairs rooms and work was well underway to fix up another two rooms.

Tom's eyes had almost popped out of his head when he had seen the first two rooms Marjory and Rose had redone. They hadn't let him help with the painting and Rose had declared that paint and wallpaper in the local shops was much too expensive. She had purchased the supplies on a visit to the outskirts of London to visit one of their relatives. The walls were freshly painted and paper had been applied to the top of the walls. Painted boards ran around each room to as a chair rail and other molding had been applied to create the look of panels. The bed frames, dressers and nightstands were freshly painted. Curtains and comforters from the chests in the attic had been re-made for each room. The floors had been scrubbed and freshly waxed and covered with a bedside rug. Each room had an armchair Rose had managed to find second hand and recovered with fabric from old draperies. Rose who Sybil had come to realize was rather a tight wad had haggled the poor man selling the chairs down to less than half of what he had been originally asking.

Sybil had promised to go through the attics at the Dower House and see what she could find that may be of use. She had been flabbergasted by the variety of ideas the women had for using the discarded items they had found in the trunks in the attic. The last she had seen they were busy making hand made rugs for the next two rooms from old clothes.

Sybil's parents had asked everyone for a family dinner when they arrived in Yorkshire to drop off the children. Sybil and Tom would be returning to London in two days time. Matthew had allowed Mary to move back with him seven months after she had returned to Downton but she was still on a tight leash. Matthew was still busy with work, but like everyone his income was substantially less than before the crash. They were able to keep their cook, but they had to make do with a cleaning woman once a week that came in to do the laundry and heavy cleaning. Mary had balked a bit at first, but had learned to do some simple chores around the house and was gradually accepting the change in family circumstances.

Lord Grantham had fared the crash reasonably well and had been sitting on his remaining assets after Tom's warning in the summer of 1929. He could not afford to loose anymore than he already had. He had exchanged some of the farmland from the estate for his remaining debts. The income from the property rentals provided a sufficient living that he and Lady Cora were living comfortably.

"It is very commendable you've found a way to use the house to create employment," Lord Grantham commented at dinner. He had a slight slackness to one side of his mouth from his stroke but was otherwise unaffected.

"I must say taking in lodgers doesn't sound very palatable," Edith commented.

"We're only accepting Interns and Resident doctors," Sybil replied. "They are so busy with their studies they aren't much trouble. We're only converting the old servants' rooms. I don't know how many lodgers we will take yet, probably not more than six. There is still plenty of room for the family to visit upstairs."

"It does seem you've thought this through well," Matthew said.

"There are a number of houses in our area being converted into apartments," Tom commented. "They're really quite ghastly."

Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at him. He had commented often enough on his dislike of oversized homes.

"What? I like our house. I'm getting soft in my old age," he said. "I like coming home to a warm house and a comfortable armchair."

Everyone tittered before they went back to their meal. Before they were through Sir Anthony had offered Sybil to look through the attics at his residence for anything she could use as well.

"My first wife Maude was forever changing something," he said. "You might find a few things you can use."

"You might as well take a look at Crawley House as well," Mary volunteered. "I've never been up to the attic. I doubt anyone has in years."

By the end of the weekend Sybil had a large enough pile of boxes, chairs and side tables to take back to London with her Tom complained it would take him two trips to get it all from the station to the house.

"Don't be such a baby," she teased him. "You like your warm house don't you?"

"I like you in my warm bed better," he whispered in her ear.

"Tom Branson, what's got into you this last while," Sybil said with a laugh.

"Age."

"Forty-one is not old. You still look the same to me as the day I met you."

"Then you need glasses."

Sybil stood back and regarded her husband. There were a few white hairs beginning to show here and there. His hair was starting to thin and there were a few more lines around his eyes, but to her he looked exactly the same.

"No," she said slowly. "My rose colored ones suit me just fine."


	8. Life Happens

Life Happens

When Tom and Sybil returned home with the pile of found items from Yorkshire Rose and Marjory's jaw's had dropped.

"There is one thing about aristocratic families," Sybil told them. "They never throw anything out."

By late summer six rooms had been completed. Sybil had no problems finding occupants quickly. Word had spread at the hospital and the medical school two of their lodgers attended that she had more rooms that might soon be available and a number of student doctors had approached her about accommodations. Screening the first six lodgers had been a simple matter as gossip spread quickly around the hospital and she had turned away two men who were known womanizers.

She decided to have a meeting with Tom and their two employees to decide what to do with the remaining four rooms. Their current lodgers made the women's wages more than affordable and the income from their rent would cover the heating costs for the winter.

"We wanted to ask for your opinions on what to do with the remaining four rooms," Sybil asked the sisters after dinner that evening. "I've had numerous requests for rooms at work, but I don't want to overload the two of you with work. We realize there is quite a substantial amount of cleaning now with so many of the rooms open."

"One of the young men mentioned that his parents would not be able to attend his graduation as they could not afford the hotel prices in the city," Marjory said. "The remaining rooms are larger. Perhaps we could convert two of them into rooms with double beds and rent them out on an occasional basis. We would have almost enough materials left from what you brought from Yorkshire, Mrs. Branson. It wouldn't create that much more work, if the rooms were used only occasionally."

"If we finished all of the rooms you could let out two more and let two as guest accommodation." Rose volunteered. "The cooking would be almost no different for another two lodgers. The income would cover the cost of hiring someone to come in through the day to help with the cleaning. Goodness knows there are enough people looking for work. I'm sure someone would jump at the chance to have a steady position."

"Do you think there are enough materials for four rooms?" Tom asked. "I don't want to outlay too much."

"There's certainly enough left from what Mrs. Branson brought from Yorkshire for two more rooms," Marjory said. "We would need two double beds and perhaps some night stands if we set up the rooms for the guest accommodation."

"There was a great deal more things at my parents," Sybil said. "Sir Anthony's attic was packed. I only chose things I knew we could use right away."

"If you ladies feel you can manage then I have no issue with converting the other four rooms," Tom said. "We won't be able to hire a third person until the other rooms are let though."

When Tom and Sybil arrived in Downton to pick up the children for the summer. They couldn't believe how much the boys had grown. Riordan had gained muscle and was starting into puberty. He was starting to resemble his father more and more and had his lips tightly squeezed together.

"How was your summer son?" Tom asked him.

"Fine," he said before he squeezed his lips shut again.

"Riordan, what is the matter with your mouth?" Sybil asked.

"Nothing."

"A little trouble with your voice, son?" his father asked.

The only answer was a nod.

"Riordan sounds funny," Merilee blurted out joyfully.

"That's enough of that," her father admonished. Merilee shrunk a little under her father's displeasure.

"How was your summer?" Sybil asked her.

"I can pour tea perfectly," she informed her mother, "but I liked it when we visited Colleen and Rory better. Colleen let me milk the cow."

"Aunt Mary taught us all to ride at Aunt Edith's," Jay volunteered. "I got to milk the cows but Aunt Edith said Merilee would ruin her hands. Aunt Mary agreed with her."

"The next time we visit Ireland, I'm sure you can milk the cow," Sybil said. "It doesn't hurt to learn how to be a lady. You might have use of it one day."

"I'd rather be a milk maid than a lady," Merilee said with a sigh.

"So you'd like some live stock at home?" her father asked.

"Can we get a cow?" Merilee asked her eyes wide.

"I was thinking of something a little smaller," Tom answered. He went to get a box from the entrance to the Dower House with a kitten mewing madly inside.

"Tom, you've always said we don't need pets," Sybil chided him.

"It will keep down the mice," he said with a shrug and a crooked grin.

By Christmas the lower floor of the house had been completely converted. When Tom had gone down to see the finished product the transformation was nothing short of miraculous. No one would ever guess the rooms had once been the men's servants' quarters. The only thing that remained the same was the kitchen. Even the servants' hall had been spruced up with a fresh paint job, pictures on the walls and a tablecloth.

A letter arrived from Rory saying that Colleen had been feeling poorly and was going to see a specialist in Dublin after the first of the year. He was busy as ever with work. Kathy was growing like a weed and chatting up a storm. They were expecting Tom's mother for Christmas. He had heard from his sister in Limerick. They exchanged a few letters and they were expecting her and her husband for a day visit over the holidays.

"I was thinking of our last trip to Ireland the other day," Sybil said after she had read Rory's letter. "I wish we could go over again."

"Maybe next summer," Tom said. "Once Colleen gets feeling better."

"I have to admit, I like the area where they live much better than Dublin."

"The next thing you'll want a cow in the back yard the same as Merilee," Tom teased her.

Sybil swatted him before she curled up against him on the sofa in the drawing room. The children were all out at friends and the house was quiet.

"I just meant the people are much friendlier and the scenery is quite lovely."

"And what would you have me do there?" Tom continued to tease. "Would you have me become a gentleman farmer?"

"A fitting occupation for an old retired politician sounds about right," Sybil teased him back.

"I thought you said I wasn't old," Tom said as he moved to kiss her.

"I thought you said you were," Sybil replied as she got up and pulled him towards the stairs. "You'll just have to prove to me that you aren't that old yet."

"I'm still young enough to do this," he said scooping her into his arms and carrying her up the stairs.

"I could have sworn you were lighter the last time I did this," Tom said with a twinkle in his eye when they reached the top. "Your age must be catching up to you."

Sybil gave him a good swat before she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him thoroughly.

The house had been busy over the holidays. One of the lodger's parents and two siblings had occupied the guest accommodations for a week. The family from Yorkshire had all made trips to London for shopping, business or visiting and stayed in the upstairs bedrooms. Since the majority of the house was open now and they had plenty of room, Tom and Sybil had thrown a small party for the people from Tom's work and another for Sybil's friends from the hospital. The children had visited back and forth with their friends and at times it had felt as though the house would burst at the seams. Entertaining had taken a much different form than during the 20's. No one arrived without bringing a plate of food or a bottle of wine to contribute to the festivities. Potlucks had become commonplace with simplicity becoming the style.

In April a letter arrived from Tom's mother to say she had decided to rent the house in Dublin and was making a permanent move to Listowel to live with Rory and Colleen. Colleen was still feeling poorly and Rory was terribly worried but hadn't said exactly what was wrong. Tom's mother was finding it harder and harder to manage the house financially. She hoped they would be able to make it over during the summer.

A month or so later a call came through from Ireland. Sybil was out with one of the children and Tom had just gotten home from work.

"Tom," Rory said. "I need your help."

"Whatever you need," Tom replied.

"Colleen's sick, really sick. I need you to go and let her parents know. I don't want to tell them in a letter. She doesn't want to tell them, but they should know their daughter's dying."

"Christ, Rory," Tom said as he found a chair to sit on. "How long has she got?"

"Sometime around the end of the year, maybe a little longer. She has leukemia. There's no cure. Fresh food and air seem to slow the disease in some cases. She's most likely had it for sometime. Our lifestyle has probably slowed it down considerably."

"We were planning to come for a visit in a couple of months. Do you still want us to come?"

"Yes, it will give her something to think about."

"I'll go up and tell her parents in a few days."

"Tom ... thanks."

"I'll let you know soon when were coming."

When Sybil got home late that afternoon, she spotted Tom's hat and coat by the front door but couldn't find him anywhere on the main floor or downstairs. She went out to the garage to find him busy tinkering with one of the cars. Whenever something was bothering him, she knew she would find him in the garage.

"I thought I might find you out here," she said.

"The car needs a little work," he replied.

Sybil had taken the same car out the previous week and knew full well it was running perfectly. She took a seat on her favorite crate and waited for him to tell her what was bothering him. Tom finally set the wrench down. Closed the bonnet and came to lean against the side of the car.

"Rory called."

"From Ireland? What's wrong?"

"Colleen's got leukemia. He wants me to go and tell her parents."

"Oh no," Sybil got up quickly and ran her arms around her husbands waist. He put his arms around her and held her close.

"He says it's moving slow. She has maybe till the end of the year or a little longer. He wants us to come for a visit."

"She's only twenty-five and Kathy is too young to loose her mother."

"I know. I was thinking we could leave the children with your parents and go as soon as they're done school. I'm pretty sure I can get the time."

"I've got time off coming as well. People always want extra hours. It shouldn't be a problem."

"Things were going just too well, weren't they?" Tom questioned.

"I see people die almost every day," Sybil said. "It's different when it's your own."

"I suppose life just happens sometimes. We don't get to pick and choose." Tom took her hand and they started to head back in the house after he closed up and locked the garage.

"I feel older today," Sybil said.

"I do too, Love, I do too."


	9. Tit For Tat

Tit-for-Tat

"Jay, close the door and come inside before you catch your death," Marjorie called.

Jay had been at the back door every few minutes for the last half hour to see if his father and Riordan were back with the car. He had come down with a bad head cold shortly after returning from Aunt Edith's that summer and he was just about better. He shoved his hands in the pockets of his robe and plunked himself on a chair at the kitchen table and sighed.

"They're taking forever," he whined.

"They've only been gone less than an hour. Have some patience," Marjorie replied. "Now wash your hands and peel these apples for me."

Jay did as he was told, the entire time sulking at the apples. He had wanted to go shopping for a radio with Da, but Mum had said no. It was September 1932. His father said the radio would revolutionize politics. Jay didn't care about that. He wanted to listen to the serial stories on the radio. He had been to a friends house last spring who had a radio and he had been wishing they had a radio ever since. Buttons their cat was busy winding himself around Jay's feet under the table. Jay had just finished peeling the apples when he heard the car pull into the yard. He jumped up apples forgotten and ran to the window.

Tom Branson came in carrying a box and headed through to the servant's hall.

"It's awfully small," Jay said hoping from one foot to the other.

"It's not that small when you have to carry it," he father replied. He set the box on the table and unpacked the radio. He placed it on a table that had been cleared off to make room for the new gadget and plugged it in.

"Turn it on, turn it on," Jay said squirming in anticipation.

"The broadcasts aren't on for another two hours," Riordan informed him.

"Oh," Jay said clearly disappointed.

"We'll all come down and try it out later," his father said. "You can have the honor of turning it on for the first time."

Tom headed to the library, took a seat at his desk and opened the packet of pictures he had picked up from the photo laboratory. The children had taken a brownie camera with them to their Aunt's that summer and had presented their father with two rolls of film for developing. The first few pictures were of Merilee with a variety of horses and cows. When Sybil and he had headed to Ireland that summer Merilee had complained bitterly all the way to the station that she wanted to go to Ireland to milk Rory's cow. After the first few miles on the train he had scolded her and she had remained silent and brooding the rest of the way to Downton.

"For heavens sake Edith, let her milk the cows," Sybil had said when she saw her sister. "We've been hearing about it all winter."

The majority of the pictures were of the boys doing chores around the farm or holding up fish they had caught. There were a few of Sybil's family posing by the rose bushes at the Dower House and one of a grimacing Merilee dressed up in a fancy dress, with a hat and lace gloves. Tom couldn't help but laugh. Sybil had told him she was the same way but had changed completely once she turned thirteen.

The trip that summer had been a difficult one. Colleen and Rory had come to terms with her disease and were making every minute count. The permanent black circles under Colleen's eyes and the blue tint to her lips were constant reminders that her time was limited. Colleen had always reminded him of a blue wild flower dancing in the breeze. It was as though she was slowly withering away. Colleen tried but couldn't manage the house on her own anymore. His mother was there keeping house for them. He had noticed as well that she was starting to show her age. Deep down the trip had reminded him of his own mortality and the things he had wanted to do with his life and never done.

Tom sat back in his chair and surveyed the room. His desk, this room, the entire house were symbols of everything he had so vehemently decried when he was young and idealistic. He still remembered the first time he had seen the place and wondered how he would ever pay to heat it. The move to London was originally supposed to be for two or three years. Fourteen years later this was their home with three children, a cat and three employees. He couldn't and wouldn't bring himself to call them servants. "At least the place generates the income to pay them," he consoled himself. "You're not a complete sell out yet." His and Sybil's plans to travel and see more of the world were on hold for at least another ten years until the children were all grown and settled into lives of their own.

When Sybil came into the room he handed her the picture of the grimacing Merilee. Sybil laughed at the image.

"She'll discover boys and it will change," she told him. "Then you'll be worried about her kissing some boy who you think is inappropriate."

"Our daughter will have the good sense not to go kissing some boy I don't approve of," Tom replied with a frown.

"You mean the way I did?" Sybil said with a laugh before she kissed him on the cheek.

Just before it was time for the radio broadcast everyone in the house gathered in the old servants' hall. Most of the lodgers were home and everyone was excited. Jay did the honors of turning the knob for the power and Riordan tuned the dial as the man at the store had demonstrated. Finally the static cleared and they could hear the BBC pre-broadcast signal. Jay was still so excited he couldn't stand still.

"Jay, sit down," Sybil instructed him.

When the broadcast started everyone was transfixed and listened to every word and piece of music with close attention. When the broadcast ended and the radio was turned off the room began to clear.

"My goodness, that could be a time waster," Marjory commented. "I'll have to bring my knitting next time."

Tom had been thinking much the same thing about the waste of time, but one look at the happy expression on his middle child's face put his concerns to rest.

"I have a feeling we won't have any problem getting schoolwork done from now on," Tom told Sybil.

"Or getting their rooms picked up," she replied.

They found Merilee sitting on the stairs as they made their way up. She had been holding Buttons the cat through the entire broadcast so he wouldn't miss it either.

"What do you think of the radio?" Sybil asked her.

"It was kind of boring," Merilee replied. "All the news was about politics. The man in the box didn't say anything about cows or horses or chickens or anything interesting."

Her parents looked at each other and rolled their eyes. They had definitely spoken too soon.

That year on Christmas Day King George V was to address the world over the wireless. Everyone again gather to hear the broadcast. The novelty had worn off a bit with the radio over the last few months, but it was still on every evening with at least three or four people gathered around with Jay front and center as soon as he had finished his daily chores and had his school work checked.

Today Merilee was busy starting a scarf with the wool and knitting needles she had received for Christmas. Marjory and Rose had been teaching her to knit and Merilee had decided it was almost as interesting as the animals at Aunt Edith's but not quite. Buttons had quickly discovered the ball of wool as well and had already managed to get himself tangled in it once today. As soon as Merilee finished two knitting projects she would earn a badge at Brownies.

"Merilee, put your knitting down and listen to the King," her mother scolded.

"Yes, Mum," she said with a sigh. She didn't see what was so _historic_ about listening to the radio. Earning her knitting badge would be a much more historic occasion in her opinion.

Both of her brothers were in the Boy Scouts and were forever talking about camping and the games they played at their meetings. Merilee had pestered her parents until they relented and signed her up for Brownies. It was ever so fun singing songs and earning badges. She could hardly wait until she was old enough to be a Girl Guide and go on camping trips.

Just after the New Year Edith and Mary arrived in London to stay with the children while Tom and Sybil and their parents went to Ireland for Colleen Lester's funeral. Mary was four months pregnant with her first child. Edith and Mary occupied their time receiving guests and paying calls while the children were in school. Mary's desire to be the star of society had cooled over the last few years since her return to her husband's side. Their Aunt Rosamund had sold her London house years earlier and was now occupied with touring the continent. The last letter their father had received, she was planning a trip to America.

"Eeeek," Mary screamed when she opened the dumb waiter to remove the clean dishes she was sending up to the dining room from the kitchen when a cat jumped out.

"Mary. What's wrong?" Edith questioned as she hurried into the pantry off the dining room.

"The cat was in the waiter. It gave me a start," she replied.

It was only a few seconds and they could hear Merilee giggling while calling the cat.

"I've had about enough of her nonsense," Mary told Edith. Merilee was being extremely difficult and had been playing practical jokes on her Aunts non-stop since they had arrived. The boys were occupied with school and their Scouting activities and were no problem at all. "That one needs tit-for-tat. She is entirely too spoiled."

"Mary, what are you going to do?" Edith asked.

"Something she won't soon forget."

Two days later after a trip to the pharmacists, Mary and Edith were ready to spring their trap. The boys had gone to an overnight Scout event and Merilee was sulking around the house.

"Merilee, do go and take a bath. We had planned on taking you to the zoo this afternoon," Mary said over breakfast.

"Mind you brush your teeth well," Edith added.

"Yes, Aunt," Merilee replied. She cleared her dirty dishes from the table and placed them in the dumb waiter before she headed upstairs to do as she was told.

It wasn't a few minutes when they heard a loud gagging sound coming from the upstairs.

"Aunt Mary, come quick. There's something wrong with the tooth paste."

Mary entered the bathroom to see Merilee attempting to wipe a thick gooey substance off of her lips and teeth with a face cloth.

"How can there be something wrong with the toothpaste?" Mary questioned. "The label clearly states what it is."

"It's all sticky and it tastes terrible," Merilee complained.

"I have no idea," Mary said. "Now do get a move on with your bath or we'll never get to the zoo."

Mary exited the room to find Edith in the hall. The two women had to put their hands over their mouths to keep from laughing out loud. They had found a tube of men's hair cream at the pharmacists and carefully switched the paper label on the hair cream with one on a tube of toothpaste that looked exactly the same. A few minutes later they heard a loud splash come from the other side of the door.

"Aunt Edith, Aunt Mary, help!"

Mary and Edith headed into the washroom to see Merilee with her bottom stuck in the toilet bowl. Her feet were off the ground and her arms were flailing trying to pull herself out.

"My goodness, I thought we taught you to be a Lady," Edith said. "How can you be a proper Lady in society or even a future Girl Guide if you can't get yourself ready in the mornings?"

They each had one arm and were pulling her out of the toilet.

"I get myself ready all the time," Merilee replied. "It was all slippery and I fell in."

"Well, do be more careful dear," Mary said.

Mary and Edith had to go down the hall to a bedroom before they broke out in laughter. They opened the door slightly to wait for the next reaction. It wasn't long and a loud scream came from the bathroom. The rushed back to see what was happening. They entered the room to see Merilee sitting in the bathtub in bright blue water that just covered her feet, ankles and bottom. She was holding up her hands that were now bright blue and screaming.

"Whatever is the matter?" Mary said.

"The water. My hands. I'm all blue." Merilee cried.

Edith reached over and shut off the faucet.

"I don't see anything," Mary said innocently.

"Neither do I," Edith said.

"Look!" Merilee cried waving her hands at them.

"You had best come over by the window where I can see with better light," Mary said handing her a towel.

Merilee quickly got out of the tub and went to stand by the window. Her hands feet and bottom were all bright blue. Edith quickly pulled the plug on the tub and unscrewed the head on the faucet tipping the rest of the bluing crystals down the drain. Mary was busy making a great show of inspecting Merilee's hands.

"I'll have to tell your mother to take you to have your eyes tested when they return," Mary said quite seriously.

"I have your bath run," Edith said. She had refilled the tub with clean water.

Mary and Edith made a hasty retreat down the hall to Edith's room before they burst into laughter. They were still laughing and wiping their eyes when the bedroom door opened and Merilee stood in the door wrapped in a towel.

"Aunt Mary, Aunt Edith!" Merilee cried stamping her foot.

"Not so fun when the shoe is on the other foot is it?" Mary asked her still laughing.

"No, not really," Merilee said, looking crestfallen.

"Don't worry the blue will wear off in a few days," Edith said. She was finding it hard not to laugh. "Come along, I'll help you finish your bath and clean up the mess."

An hour and a half later Merilee was waiting for them by the front door with her hat and coat on and her gloves. They had been fighting with her all week to wear her hat and gloves, which she had steadfastly refused to do.

"All ready then?" Edith asked her.

"Yes, Aunt."

"Not feeling too blue?" Mary asked before she and Edith both broke out in yet another fit of giggles.


	10. Change of the Guard

Change of the Guard

"I'm thirteen and I want to learn to drive too."

"You're not old enough. I'll teach you to drive when you turn fifteen the same as your brothers."

"You learned to drive when you were thirteen."

"I did and I was working as a driver on weekends when I was fourteen. I was too young and you're still not old enough."

Tom Branson had had this argument with his daughter at least three times in the last two months. Her obsession with livestock had now been replaced with one for all things mechanical. So far raising their children had not been overly difficult. Other than a few scrapes that had gotten the boys a good talking to and a suspension of their privileges from time to time, things had been rather straightforward. Merilee on the other hand was entirely too much like him with a dose of her mother's stubbornness thrown in.

"If you won't let me drive, at least let me go to the airfield with the Girl Guides. All of the other girls will be earning their Air Mechanic badge," she wasn't about to give up.

"I told you I want to speak to your Girl Guide leader first before I give permission. If I'm satisfied you may go. I don't want you gadding about in an airplane," he replied calmly.

"Why shouldn't I learn to fly an airplane?" Merilee demanded. "Mum says ladies can do anything they put their mind to."

"There is no reason why not, when you're old enough," Tom replied.

Merilee smiled sweetly at her father and kissed him on the cheek. "You are right of course Da." Tom knew when she was trying to turn on the charm to win him over. It was one of his own ruses he used to get around Sybil.

It was the fall of 1936 and Tom was starting to feel the march of time. Riordan had entered Oxford that fall and Jay was just starting his last year of grammar school. The political climate was tense. Mass unemployment in the northern parts of the country had led to a massive protest march of the unemployed workers to London that summer. The king was involved with an American divorcee with strong ties to the ruling Nazis in Germany and it looked like whatever happened with that situation it would shake public confidence further.

Rory had come for a visit that spring and brought his seven-year-old daughter with him. Tom's mother had remained in Ireland. Her eyesight was beginning to fail and she had not felt up to the trip.

"Don't worry about your Ma," Rory told him. "She has a home with me until the end."

"How are things for her otherwise?" Tom asked. "You know she won't let on if she needs money. I've offered often enough."

"She gets a bit of rent from the house in Dublin and we have lots to eat so no worries there. I can't believe the change in the downstairs and you with servants."

"Employees," Tom corrected him quickly. "Without them we'd never afford this place."

"What news from Evelyn and Alana? Has he produced an heir yet?"

"Don't remind me," Tom groaned. "We took the ferry over to see them in Paris last summer. They have all girls. He's the Viscount now. He's appointed Riordan as his heir. It seems when there is a lack of a legitimate male heir, an heir through illegitimate channels can be appointed as long as the father acknowledged the existence of the child. Since our common father supported my Ma and me for all those years. Riordan is it."

"Riordan's got a good head on him. I wouldn't let it worry you too much," Rory told him.

"Twenty years ago if anyone had told you, you would be accepting of a peer and the title and all the rest would you have believed them?" Tom said with a slight laugh.

"I'd have probably punched their lights out," Rory said laughing as well. "As soon as my sister and her husband from Limerick found out my adoptive family had a peer in it, they made themselves scarce. I hear from them once a year at Christmas. It is what it is."

"Poor Evelyn. I still can't believe how you set him up at your wedding."

"It worked didn't it," Rory shrugged. "He met Alana and the rest is history."

"And what about you? Have you used any of your matchmaking techniques on yourself?"

"No. I don't have time and I'll wait until Kathy is older."

"You'll be an old man by then."

"Not that old. Find me one just like Sybil and I'll consider it," Rory replied.

"Can't. She broke the mold."

Sybil had indeed broken the mold with her views on women's rights. It was very uncommon for married women to work and even more so when they had children. By choosing a profession where there were always staffing shortages and specializing in surgical nursing where the shortages were felt the hardest, she was able to get the hospital to hire her on and overcome their resistance to her marital status. With her experience she was now the head surgical matron at the hospital where she worked.

In December the nation was reeling from the shock of Edward VIII's abdication. Sybil's father had been suffering from declining health since the stock market crash in '29. With the abdication the last vestiges of the aristocracy were truly smashed. Robert Crawley suffered a massive coronary a week after the abdication and died. He was sixty-nine years old. His funeral was held at the Downton church. The family, most of the village and numerous old friends and acquaintances were in attendance. Matthew was in shock as he was now Lord Grantham.

"I never thought this day would come," Matthew said once the family had gathered after the guests had left.

"It will come someday for your son as well," Sybil reminded him gently. Mary and Matthew now had two young children, a three-year-old girl and a two-year-old boy.

"Will you take a seat in the House of Lords?" Sir Anthony questioned.

"No, I'll leave the politics up to Tom," Matthew replied. "I'm still satisfied to be a country solicitor."

"Another few years and I'll look for a post teaching journalism and politics," Tom replied. "I'm starting to get tired of the constant wrangling for position."

"I thought you enjoyed the excitement?" Matthew said.

"I do or at least I did," Tom replied with a sigh. "It's difficult to watch the suffering and unemployment when you know there is almost nothing that can be done."

"You're not sitting in your chair, doing nothing," Sir Anthony commented. "Take heart. This mess can't last forever."

Before they left Downton Sybil made her mother promise to come to London for the holidays. Lady Cora was taking the loss of her husband quietly and with dignity as she had handled things all of her life, but Sybil suspected she was grieving heavily in private.

Tom and Sybil returned home with a crate of chickens and a sack of feed from Yorkshire. Food shortages were so severe Tom had built a small chicken run in their back garden last fall with plans to stock it on their next trip to Yorkshire. If it weren't for their regular trips to visit family in the country and the availability of country produce they could bring back, they would have had even more difficulty getting enough together for a meal.

"When is this all going to end?" Sybil said to Tom as they deposited the hens into the pen at the side of the garage.

"I fear when the world has torn itself apart yet again," Tom replied.

"You don't think…war?" Sybil said suddenly looking downcast.

"It's hard to say," Tom replied before they went back into the house. "The Prime Minister wants to avoid it at any cost. There may be a point when that cost becomes too high."

"The boys," Sybil said squeezing Tom's hand.

"It hasn't happened yet. For now they're in school. We'll cross each bridge when we come to it."

"I love you," Sybil said.

"It was twenty years ago last month when I asked you to marry me."

"I remember every word."

"Are you still _terribly flattered_?"

"Very," she said before they entered the house.


	11. On the Eve of War

On the Eve of War

Sybil was starting to get a headache from the tension between her children and her husband. They had been arguing all week. She agreed with Tom but he couldn't make them see sense and she couldn't either.

"Enough," she finally said. "I'm going to call your Uncle Evelyn. I'll ask him to come over. He was an officer in the Great War and now one of the Heads of the Foreign Office. Will you listen to what he has to say?"

"Yes, Mum," they all agreed finally.

It was late August 1939 and the winds of war were blowing through the streets of London and rambling across the countryside. It was almost a foregone conclusion that war would break out any day. For a nation so beleaguered from the last war, there were hopes and prayers in every household that war would be averted at the last moment. The British navy had been running blockades for the last two years. None of the ships had been fired upon but it was only a matter of time. The War Office was ramping up and already young men were signing up.

That summer Merilee had turned sixteen and convinced her parents to allow her to take flying lessons. Sybil had fretted over the danger until Tom reminded her that Merilee was following her lead by putting the adage "women can do anything they put their mind to" she had heard touted by her mother since she was an infant into practice. To put Sybil's mind more at rest Tom had insisted she take the lessons in Yorkshire where there were fewer planes than in the London area.

Tom had spoken to her Girl Guide troop leader years previously when she had been a Girl Guide and wanted to do her Air Mechanic badge. The girl's leader had a no nonsense attitude and had assured him the course was being taught by one of the girl's fathers. The girls would be adequately chaperoned and any young men attempting to bother them would as she put it "receive a stout rap on the knuckles."

"Mr. Branson, I assure you the activity is perfectly safe. If the girls can change the fluid on a machine as large as an aircraft, they will have no issues later in life performing the same tasks on a motor car." She had then proceeded to ask him to arrange a tour of parliament and if possible a brief interview with one of the female MPs for the group. Tom had left the meeting pitying anyone who dared step out of line with the woman.

Evelyn arrived late the next day after Sybil's call to speak with the family. He had strong opinions about the current state of affairs in Europe and was extremely busy. He was thankful his own children were too young to have any thoughts about signing up. From what Sybil had told him Tom's pacifist beliefs were at odds with their children's' patriotic fervor and neither could see the other's point of view.

"Evelyn, thank you for coming," Sybil greeted him when she opened the door.

"I won't be able to stay long," he replied. "I hope I will be able to be of some assistance."

"They'll listen to your opinion. I fear they're ears are closed to mine and their father's opinions at the moment. How are Alana and the girls?"

"Quite well thank you."

They moved into the drawing room where everyone had assembled when they heard the bell ring. Riordan was now twenty and wore spectacles. Physically he resembled his father and had his mother's dark hair. Jay eighteen was the image of his father and Merilee closely resembled Sybil with traces of her father here and there.

"Your mother tells me you all want to join the armed services," Evelyn said once they had greeted him.

"We want to do our bit," Jay said. The other two nodded. "Everyone says there's going to be a war. When do you think it will happen?"

"War is a distinct possibility and I would not advise traveling to Bavaria in the near future. I'm not at liberty to discuss the details," Evelyn replied. "In regards to military service, I suggest you don't do anything until you have thought things through thoroughly."

"We have," Riordan said.

"From where I'm sitting I would disagree," Evelyn replied. All three of the young people were taken aback. "To enter the service as an officer you will need to have completed your university training. Riordan your eyesight is not the best and you maybe disqualified simply on those grounds. The country is going to need men who are educated. You had planned to study law and have another two years?"

"Yes, uncle, but I can't see what use a solicitor will have in a war."

"Quite a few really. In a war there is crime as well as in peace. White-collar crime often runs rampant. It is not uncommon in the military. It is not something one tells the public when one is trying to keep morale high. The Judge Advocate General is one of the busiest offices in the military. I suggest you finish your studies. Once you have passed the bar, I would be happy to see what I can do about getting you assigned to that office."

"Are you satisfied with your Uncle's opinion son?" Tom asked him.

"Yes Da, I will follow his advice," Riordan said. The wind had gone out of his sails and his Uncle did make sense.

Sybil had been holding her breath slightly and breathed a sigh of relief. They still had Jay and Merilee to deal with.

"Jay, my advice to you would be much the same. Finish you studies at Cambridge and then make the decision. One of the difficulties we had in the last war were too many young inexperienced officers. I have the scars to prove it. You would not be able to receive a commission without a degree under the current rules. You will need the ability to lead men if you do decide on a military career. Get involved in activities at the university where you can foster those abilities. The empire will need educated men who can lead. We have enough rabble to fill the ranks. What is it you're studying again?"

Tom grimaced slightly at Evelyn's remark. His heritage as a peer and the concepts of superiority he had been raised with still shone through from time to time, but what he was saying made sense. He just hoped his middle son could see it.

"Engineering, Uncle." Jay's love for the radio had not diminished one bit. It had grown since he was younger into an interest to what made the radio work. His natural aptitude in mathematics had combined with his curiosity about electricity and radio. He had decided to study engineering at Cambridge.

"It's easy to feel the passion and excitement the recruiters promote. It is more difficult to take the more practical road. You would be best served to stay in school as would your country."

"I understand," he said. He was slightly dejected but finally coming around to his parent's viewpoint of finishing his studies.

"Merilee, what were you thinking of?" Evelyn asked her.

"I want to join the RAF," she said. "Mum and Da won't let me."

"I rather agree with them," Evelyn replied.

Merilee had looked hopeful, now she had a defiant look on her face.

"My reasoning is possibly quite different than your parents," Evelyn continued. "Women are quite restricted in the RAF. The best you could hope for is typing documents all day long or driving a motor car and I assume that is not what you had in mind?"

"No, I want to work with airplanes. Hopefully fly them. I have my basic pilot's license."

"That won't happen in the RAF," Evelyn replied. "I suggest you look into other avenues. If you don't plan on attending university." She shook her head. "The Air Transport Authority is open to women as is the Women's Land Army. The Air Transport Authority may be your best option. You are a trifle young. The military regulations stipulate no one under the age of eighteen may participate in active duty and I would assume the same regulations apply. Make some inquiries and find out what your options are. That is my advice."

"Thank you, Uncle I knew you would be on my side," Merilee said beaming.

"I am merely suggesting you get all the facts and make an informed decision," Evelyn replied. "It is no different advice than I've given your brothers."

"Thank you so much for coming and giving us your opinion on the matter," Sybil said. "You've given us all a great deal to think about."

"I hope I was of some assistance. Now I must be off. I have to get back to work to make some phone calls. Time differences you know, they make life in the Foreign Service rather erratic at times."

Everyone thanked Evelyn for coming. Tom walked him to the door.

"I realize my stand is not as anti-military as yours," Evelyn told Tom as he was preparing to leave.

"At least you've given them food for thought and stopped them from running out the door and doing something foolish."

"We both did plenty of foolish things at their age, I'm sure," Evelyn said with a small smile.

"Don't remind me," Tom replied with a groan. "The word at work is they're hoping for a diplomatic solution."

"I have my doubts that is possible. The German high command is driven by fanaticism not logic or diplomacy. I believe they will only respond to force at this point."

"Thank you for coming. I'm sure what you have said will sink in."

The next day both boys had packed to return to university. They had both seen the logic in their uncle's advice. After a night's rest everyone had agreed any decision about signing up would be best left until after they had each graduated. Merilee was quite excited about the prospect of joining the Air Transport Authority and wanted to go to their offices first thing in the morning.

"You will wait until one of us can accompany you," her father informed her.

"Da, you're treating me like a baby," she complained. "I'm finished school. I'm not a child anymore."

"An informed decision means that your parents should be informed as well," Sybil told her quietly. "I can go with you after my shift. You may meet me at the hospital for two."

Sybil was still in her nursing uniform the next day when she and Merilee arrived at the offices of the Air Transport Authority. Merilee had met her with the car and driven them to the airfield where the offices were.

The ATA was not yet recruiting women pilots but would be if war broke out. It turned out Merilee was too young as their minimum age requirement would be eighteen for pilots, but they were prepared to offer her a position at an airfield working in the tower and training towards becoming an air traffic controller. Once she turned eighteen they would reassess the situation.

The two women thanked the man behind the desk for his assistance. Merilee was all for signing up on the spot. Sybil put her foot down and insisted she discuss the offer with her father before she would sign consent for Merilee to enroll in the ATA. The age of consent had been raised in the last few years and Merilee would need her parent's official permission.

That evening Tom gave his permission for Merilee to join the ATA as she would not be leaving the UK or actively involved in any fighting. She was making a career decision that made sense to her parents as well.

"Do you remember the first time we saw the flying machines overhead in the last war?" Sybil asked Tom that night as they were preparing for bed.

"It seems like yesterday," he said.

"I just realized something," Sybil said in surprise. "Our children will all be gone in a few weeks. We'll be on our own."


	12. An Empty Nest

An Empty Nest

By the end of August 1939 Riordan and Jay had left for the fall term at university. Merilee was busy packing to report for her new position with the ATA at Filton just outside of Bristol. Tom and Sybil had some comfort in the fact that she would not be too far from Riordan at Oxford. On August 30 the government announced they would begin the civilian evacuation of London. Residents were being advised to practice restraint in their daily lives and conserve resources. There was a general sense of fear among the general population. It was felt in Sybil's London home as well.

"I can't see the point in keeping all of these rooms open with the children gone," Sybil told Tom while they were laying in bed that night. Her head was on his shoulder and they were both lost in thought. "I think we should close up everything but the library when Merilee leaves next week. We could use one of the guest bedrooms on the lower level ourselves and close the top floor completely."

"I was thinking today how we've always talked of going back to Ireland when the children are grown. There is no way I can leave now. They are talking of making my post and some of the others at parliament an essential service. They need all of the experienced men they can get."

"Tom, I'm frightened," Sybil said finally putting a voice to what she had been feeling all day. "I wish we could go home to Downton."

"I'm frightened too love," he said pulling her closer. "They haven't declared war yet. There's still hope. After Merilee leaves we'll go to Downton for a few days and let ourselves calm down a bit."

"I wonder what Matthew is going to do with the Abbey now that the last tenants have moved out. I need to talk to Marjory and Rose and see what their plans are."

"You can talk to them in the morning. For now try and get some sleep."

The next day Sybil enlisted Merilee's help to start putting the dust covers back on the furniture in the drawing and morning rooms and both of the boy's bedrooms. They put the dining room in order and covered the furniture in there is well.

"It's sad isn't it?" Merilee said. "This is our home and it seems abandoned."

"Children grow up and leave," Sybil replied. "One day you'll all be married with children of your own. You'll come to visit your father and I and the house will be full of life again."

"I think I'm a little home sick already and I haven't left yet."

"I cried all the way to Dublin when I left home. We'll write and you'll be so busy you won't have time to be home sick. I want to know all about your new post and what your doing."

"Mum, I'm frightened," Merilee said wrapping her arms around her mother.

"There, there," her mother soothed. "Where is that stiff Crawley upper lip? You must have inherited something from my side. You can't always be like your father."

Merilee chuckled slightly.

"I love you Mum."

"I love you too," Sybil said dabbing her eyes with a hanky. "Now let's get this dining room finished before your father comes home from work. He'll wonder what we've been doing all day."

That afternoon Sybil sat down with Marjory and Rose to see what their plans were.

"We haven't really made any plans, Mrs. Branson," Rose told her. "You and your husband took us in when we had no where to go. We don't want to leave you out on a limb."

"Don't feel you have to stay," Sybil replied. "Your welcome here as long as you like, but if you find a place away from London it may be safer."

"Our cousin runs a hotel on the south coast," Marjory said. "He wrote asking if we wanted to come and work there. He's worried all of the young men will leave and he'll have no help. With all of the young women heading to factories, he is going to have trouble finding help in the spring when it gets busy."

In fact the girl they had hired to come in and help with the house cleaning had left for a factory job the previous month and they had been unable to find a replacement.

"As soon as Merilee is gone, we'll be moving down to the guest accommodation. We can manage if need be."

"I don't really want to go right now," Rose said. "This has been our home for ten years. Perhaps we could stay until after the first of the year? It would give you time to make some plans as well."

"That would be agreeable," Sybil replied. They had five lodgers at the moment and no one was sure how the impending war would affect the need for housing or the medical schools.

Tom phoned later in the day to say he had to stay at work. Germany had just invaded Poland and the Prime Minister was making a last ditch attempt at appeasement. Sybil relayed the information concerning Marjory and Rose.

"We'll talk more about it tonight when I get home," Tom said. "Keep the home fires burning."

"Tom it's the first of September. It's much too warm for a fire," Sybil said trying to make light of the situation. "I'll see you when you get home."

The next few days were tense. Tom was at work almost non-stop and everyone spent the evenings huddled around the radio listening for the latest news. The atmosphere at the hospital was tense. Those that remembered the horrors of the last war were bracing themselves for what was about to come. Meetings were being held to make plans for the war wounded if it came to that and sand bags were being put in place around the exterior of the building. It did nothing to quell Sybil's feeling of dread.

On September 3 King George VI addressed the nation. In London there was a collective pause as everyone who could find a radio listened to the broadcast. England was now at war with Germany. After the speech Sybil wondered if they had been living with an extended cease-fire rather than in a time of peace for the last twenty-one years. Tom returned home that night exhausted. For the first time she noticed he was showing every day of his forty-nine years.

Merilee left on the train a few days later. When Sybil returned home the vastness of the house and the feeling of emptiness were overwhelming. That evening Tom couldn't find her downstairs or in the library. As he climbed the stairs he could hear faint sounds coming from the bathroom. He opened the door to find Sybil lying in the bathtub with the lights off.

"I was wondering where you had got to," he said quietly. The room was only illuminated by the moonlight coming in the window.

"I didn't want to rush, so I came up here."

Tom knelt by the side of the tub, took the cloth and began washing her back.

"Do you think she'll be alright," he said as he washed. "She's so young."

"She's the same age I was when I met you. Remember the count in Ripon?"

"How could I forget?" He stopped what he was doing and ran a finger along the faint scare along her hairline.

"You were so heroic," Sybil said dreamily.

"And you were so headstrong and foolish."

"Join me?"

Tom nodded before he disposed of his clothes and joined Sybil in the tub. She had let a little water drain out so it wouldn't spill over the top. She leaned back against Tom once he was seated behind her.

"It's almost like when we were first married," Sybil said.

"Except for the grey hair and wrinkles," Tom replied. "Things don't bend quite as easily as they used to."

"You still kiss the same," Sybil said.

"I do, do I?" Tom said as he kissed her. He took his time savoring the feel of her lips. No matter how many times he kissed her, her lips still felt like a pair of satin pillows against his. Her tongue stroked his slowly until he finally broke the kiss. He pulled her hair back into a handful and kissed the side of her neck. Fashion trends had come and gone but Sybil had left her hair long the way he liked it. The odd grey hair dotted the dark waves these days but it still had the feel of silk.

Sybil took the cloth and washed his legs and feet. Then sat on her haunches to wash his torso. She washed his neck and face. His face was still so changeable and showed every emotion. The minute he smiled his serious side was gone and he looked like a young man again. She rinsed him off then leaned forward to place a kiss on his lips.

"You still look the same when you smile," she said once they parted.

She pulled him forward to wash his back. Tom was busy nuzzling her neck and fondling her breasts. Once she had his back rinsed she stood up and stepped out of the tub. She turned back and offered him her hand. Tom stood as well and stepped out. Sybil pulled him slightly towards the chair in the corner of the room where she had left a towel. She put her hands on his shoulders and pushed him down onto the chair, then lowered herself onto his lap straddling him. Tom pulled her close and put his arms around her. Sybil ran kisses down the side of his face and neck until her mouth found his again. Tom ran his hands along her sides cupping her breasts. He held her waist urging her closer until she lowered herself onto his erection.

Tom kissed her neck and breasts kneading the soft flesh with one hand while his other arm circled around her waist guiding her movements. She glanced down between their bodies to see them joined in the faint light. A smile played across her face as she thought how they were not two separate individuals but one in that moment. Tom reached between them and stroked her pushing her towards completion. She groaned and threw back her head as the sensations overtook her and her body spasmed. He groaned and pulled her tight against him as he followed suit.

"The next you'll tell me that's still the same too," he said tenderly once their bodies had stilled. Sybil hadn't moved off his lap yet. She kissed him softly on the lips.

"Some things keep getting better."


	13. Shelter From the Storm

Shelter From the Storm

"My grandmother's rose bushes! What have you done?" Sybil exclaimed when she returned from work two weeks after the war had started to find Tom and two of the lodgers in the back yard digging a massive hole. They had a huge pile of dirt beside the hole and were still digging. There was a large pile of steel sheets some with domed sections sitting on the driveway beside the garage.

"Don't fret," Tom said after he tossed a shovel full of dirt out of the hole. "We dug the bushes up. They're around the side of the house. I'll plant them again later. We have to get this air raid shelter put in. Once it's in you can plant flowers over top next spring to cover it up a bit."

"Where did you get it?" Sybil asked. She still wasn't convinced that Tom hadn't destroyed the back garden for all time.

"It was seven pounds. They're free to people who make under three hundred and fifty a year. Civil defense brings them around if you order one. There's a pamphlet on the table in the dining hall. You might want to get some things together to outfit it once we get it put in. No reason to be uncomfortable if we have to come out here some night."

Sybil headed in the house hung up her coat, hat and gas mask and went to find the pamphlet. There were pamphlets from the civil defense on almost every aspect of life this last while, from how to hang black out curtains to instructions on how to make your rations last the week. She made herself a cup of tea, found the pamphlet and sat down to read it.

The shelter Tom was installing in the backyard was called an Anderson shelter and was large enough for six people. Since they had nine people living in the house it would be a tight fit if they were all there at the same time if the sirens sounded. The interns all worked shifts and were seldom home at the same time. Hopefully they wouldn't all be jammed in there some night together. Buttons jumped on Sybil's lap and began to purr.

"We'll have to put a basket out there for you too," Sybil said to the cat as she stroked his fur. When she finished her tea she went to find Rose and Marjory to help her gather things to put in the shelter to make it more comfortable. The transition to living downstairs hadn't been too drastic. Tom said the dining hall on the lower level reminded him of his working years at Downton when the servants would gather in their dining hall to read or socialize in the evenings. The radio was always on and a few times they had danced to the music when they were alone after everyone had retired for the night. A few times they had spent the evenings in the library but it was easier to heat one level of the house and not have to fiddle with the blackout curtains upstairs.

The women decided to disassemble a bed from the old female servants quarters and bring it down to put in the shelter. It hadn't been used in years but it would be more comfortable than sitting on a hard wooden bench and someone could always lie down for a rest if need be. Sybil headed out to the garage and found a small table and an old bench for the shelter as well. An old kitchen chair rounded out the pile of furniture for the shelter.

"And where do you think you're going to put all that?" Tom asked her when he saw the pile the women had put together.

"It will all fit, trust us. Besides Marjory is a whiz at decorating. She'll have the shelter looking homey in no time," Sybil said with a grin.

Tom just threw up his hands in surrender and went to wash up before teatime.

"We'll get the hole finished up tomorrow," one of the other men said as he came in. "It won't be long and we'll have the garden back to rights."

"I have every confidence," Sybil replied. She made a mental note to check the rose bushes and get them back in the ground that evening before nightfall.

The next afternoon when Sybil got home the men had finished digging and were busy putting together the sheets of steel like some type of oversized building toy. Tom was at work and three of the lodgers were working on the shelter. The children from the neighborhood were all standing around the hole watching, as this was the first air raid shelter in the neighborhood. Sybil went inside to find Marjory and Rose had two large boxes packed with blankets, flashlights and a variety of other items and stored in the corner of the dining hall.

"There's no sense putting it all outside permanently to go musty," Rose said. "We though we could just take them out if the siren sounds when we go."

Rose and Marjory were busy through the days putting up produce Sybil and Tom had brought back from their weekend trip to Downton. Meat was already in short supply in the shops. Sybil had managed to get two dressed pheasants from Edith and Rose was trying to stretch the meat as far as she could with the portions they were allowed with their rations. The tomato vines in the back garden were still producing and the ladies had been canning tomatoes, beans and peas all summer to add to the larder. Sybil checked the bunches of blackberry leaves she had hanging in the kitchen to see if they were dry. The leaves could be crushed and used as tea when they ran out of the real thing. Over the last few years shortages in the stores had forced them to be inventive when they were stocking the larder. She had a feeling some things would be getting even harder to come by over the next while.

Sybil went and changed and then collected the post from the front door. There was a letter from Merilee telling all about her new life and how she was getting on. She seemed happy and enthusiastic and described her three new roommates in detail. There were also letters from Riordan and Jay telling about their classes and the activities they had chosen to be involved in at the universities. There was a fourth letter from Rory. Tom's mother was failing a little more each day. They shouldn't worry as she was not experiencing any pain and was keeping herself busy around the place. Kathy was doing well and was busy riding her pony when she was not in school. So far the Irish Free State was remaining neutral and things in their area were quiet.

Over the next few days the wounded began arriving at the hospital. It was not the onslaught of the major battles of the Great War Sybil remembered but it was still a trying time. The younger nurses who had never dealt with the massive trauma of war injuries were often overwhelmed and had to be reassured or given extra direction with their duties.

"You must remain professional at all times," Sybil had coached one nurse who was a recent graduate of nursing school. She had found her crying behind a linen rack. "Place a cotton swab in your mouth if you have to and bite down on it. The men are depending on you to carry out your duties to the best of your abilities."

"Yes, Matron," was the reply. The girl dried her eyes, did as Sybil had suggested, squared her shoulders and returned to her duties.

Sybil watched her go and thought to herself, "Was I ever that young?"

At Christmas the boys returned for school break. Merilee had to stay at her post. She wrote to say one of the girls in her barracks was originally from Bristol and a bunch of them would be going to her parent's home for the day. Sybil sent Merilee a package with her favorite knitting yarn, a new pair of leather gloves and a bunch of pictures from around the house including shots of the new shelter now installed and covered with dirt in the back garden. Before the boys arrived they decided not to open the upstairs bedrooms and make do with the unoccupied rooms downstairs.

Sybil was exhausted from work. There were more and more casualties and the operating rooms were running at full capacity. As soon as one procedure was finished, and the room sanitized the next was ready to begin. It was taking all she had to ensure correct procedures were followed and her nursing staff was not being overwhelmed.

In April of 1940 a cable arrived from Rory to say Tom's mother had passed away in her sleep at the age of seventy.

"I'll get some time off and go," Tom said. "I don't want to leave everything up to Rory. I want to be there."

Marjory and Rose had left at the beginning of the month and there were still four lodgers at the house. They would all be finishing up their studies in June. Accommodation in the city was not as hard to come by as it once was and with so little of the house open, Sybil was not actively looking for more.

"I wish I could go with you," Sybil replied. "I can't leave work and I don't want to leave the lodgers here alone."

"No, Rory will understand. I'll only be able to stay a few days. Just long enough to get her affairs in order."

"You don't seem too upset with the news."

"We've known this was coming for months now. She didn't suffer and she wasn't alone. She lived a good life."

"I'm glad the bombs haven't materialized. That bomb shelter in the garden really is quite ugly."

"Better safe than sorry. With just the two of us here, we'll have it all to ourselves if we need it. I'll open it up and air it out when I get back."

Tom did a flying trip to Ireland and only stayed two days. His mother had given Rory the funds from her bank account to manage the previous year and had left the house in Dublin to Tom. Before he left he signed the house over to Rory.

"Tom, I can't take your Ma's house," Rory said.

"You can and you will. We have the place in London. If we ever need the house in Dublin I know where I can find you. You took care of her in the end, you deserve it."

"At least let me give you what's left of her funds."

"No. We have more than enough. Keep it and use it towards Kathy's education."

"You're sure about this?"

"I am."

At the end of May the true force of the war hit home with the evacuation of Dunkirk. The hospitals were packed with the wounded and for three days it seemed they would never stop coming. Sybil and all of the student doctors left at the house were so exhausted they would come home to sleep for a few hours, eat, get cleaned up and head back to work. The country was demoralized and those who remembered the slaughter of the Great War couldn't help but ask themselves, "Is it all happening again."


	14. Chaos

Chaos

"Mum, are you out here?" Riordan called.

Sybil straightened from pulling weeds between the flowers on the bomb shelter and called, "I'm here."

She came around the unsightly lump of earth to see Riordan standing just outside the door with a young dark haired woman.

"Hello, darling," she said kissing her son's cheek. "We weren't expecting you till later."

"We caught an earlier train. Mum this is Janine."

"How do you do?" Sybil said. "Riordan has told us quite a bit about you in his letters."

"I'm quite well, Mrs. Branson, thank you," she replied. Her cultured accent rivaled Sybil's own.

"Let's go in," Sybil directed. "I'm afraid I don't have any tea. Blackberry tea is all I have."

"It will do," Riordan replied.

"Your father won't be home for a few hours yet."

"You certainly have a lovely home, Mrs. Branson."

"Thank you, Janine. It's somewhat too large for just the two of us at the moment. It's been in my family for four generations now."

Riordan had written that he wanted them to meet his girlfriend Janine. She was the grandchild of an Earl, the same as himself. He had met her while she was studying at Oxford. He was bringing her with him for a week visit to London in early July 1940.

"I have something to tell you, Mum," Riordan began. "I wanted to tell you first."

"Something you think your father won't like?"

"You know how he feels about the military."

Sybil nodded her head in reply as she took a sip of her blackberry tea. They were seated in the library with Riordan leaning against his father's desk.

"I'm going to interview with the Judge Advocate General's office this week. Uncle Evelyn arranged it. I'm returning to school early. I'll study through until Chirstmas. If everything goes well, I'll take the bar then and receive my commission in January."

"You've thought this through?" Sybil asked slowly.

"I have. I want to serve my country. This is the best I can do to satisfy my own and Da's wishes. I'll be assigned to London if everything works out."

"Then I support your decision," Sybil replied.

"I've made a few other decisions as well," Riordan said with a sigh. "Janine and I are engaged."

"Oh, congratulations," Sybil replied. "When did this all come about?"

"Last month when she graduated," Riordan said smiling at Janine. Janine was looking at him and beaming. "There's something else." Riordan paused. "I've decided to leave the Catholic faith and become a Protestant. As it stands I am Evelyn's heir and a future peer. It will make things easier with Janine's family too."

Sybil had converted years previously in private to overcome the obstacles with her children's baptisms. She understood only two well the difficulty of walking with one foot in two different worlds.

"I understand only too well, Riordan. I have never been fussy about faith. I converted to keep peace. I can't begrudge you doing the same. I will support you when you tell your father."

They visited for a time until Sybil went down to prepare the evening meal. She asked Riordan to remove the dust covers from the furniture in the dining room.

"I think we'll have a proper family meal to celebrate your engagement," Sybil said.

That evening over dinner Riordan told his father of his decisions. Tom had started to protest until Sybil reminded him of the decisions she herself had to make in the early part of their life together.

"They were our decisions Tom. They were the right ones for us. Riordan needs to make his as well," Sybil told him quietly laying her hand over his.

"Your mother is right as always," Tom said taking Sybil's hand in his. "You've obviously thought this through. You do what you think is best."

That summer Jay came home and asked if he could have the use of one of the family cars. He was part of a group of engineering students that had been asked to work on a project in a remote part of Scotland. He and the three other students would be given extra fuel rations by the war department. It would make things easier if they had their own automobile. He was not at liberty to discuss what they were working on.

"You'll keep it in good order?" his father questioned as he handed him the keys to the family car. The other car was a sportster Tom and Sybil had purchased back in the 20's. Tom had chosen top quality cars and obsessively kept them in top running order. Jay had spent many hours in the garage with his father tinkering with the two automobiles. He knowledge of engines rivaled Tom's own.

"Of course, Da," Jay said flashing him a smile so like his own.

"You won't let anyone else drive it?"

"Oh Da, stop worrying."

"You won't get any ideas about joining the military like your brother will you?" Tom asked suddenly. When they were young Jay always followed his brother's lead.

"No, the work I'm involved with now is a lot more important. I can't talk about it. I'm glad now you talked me out of joining up last year, though."

"You're a bit like your mother, stubborn to a fault when you get an idea in your head. Just don't let it push you down the wrong path."

"That's the pot calling the kettle black, isn't it?"

"Just a bit," Tom replied with a chuckle.

In early September Tom developed a case of indigestion that just wouldn't go away.

"It must be the rations," Tom said. "I have the worst case of heart burn." He was rubbing his chest against the pain.

"Did you take a stomach powder?" Sybil asked him.

"I did. It helped a bit. It was hurting yesterday too."

"Go and rest for a bit," Sybil said. "I'll finish the washing up."

Sybil was just hanging up the tea towels when the first wail of the air raid sirens could be heard. She ran to get one of the boxes of supplies that were still sitting in the dining area. Tom came out of the bedroom, grabbed the other box, threw their gas masks on top of the pile and headed out the door to the shelter behind Sybil.

"Oh, the cat," Sybil said. She ran back to the house to get the cat.

"Sybil leave the damn cat," Tom called after her.

He ran after her to find her heading back out with the cat under one arm and a jug of milk in her hand. By the time they were in the shelter they could hear the sounds of the anti-aircraft shells bursting in the air. They had just switched on a flashlight and started to unpack one of the boxes when there was a loud banging on the door to the shelter. Tom opened the door a crack to see the family from next door with their two children huddled by the entrance.

"We didn't know where to go," the grandfather said. He was a retired Lord who had his daughter and two grandchildren staying with him while her husband was serving in France.

A few minutes later there was another knock and two women from down the street with an infant showed up as well. The racket in the shelter was deafening. The children were crying, the baby wailing and all of the adults were talking at once. Buttons let out a loud screech when someone stepped on his tail.

"Stop!" Tom said holding up his hands. "Lord Blackwell, you and your family sit on the bed. Everyone else find somewhere to sit while we get organized."

Everyone shuffled around in the tight space until they were seated. Tom was on the old kitchen chair, the three women were squashed together on the bench and Lord Blackwell and his family were on the bed. The children were still whimpering but things were slowly settling down.

"Now my wife and I were just looking through the supplies. We'll finish doing that and then we can get settled a bit," Tom said. He had no idea how they were going to manage with six adults and three children squashed in a shelter meant for six people, but they were here now so they had to make the best of it.

"Are there any cuts or scraps?" Sybil asked the group when she pulled the first aid kit out of the box. Everyone shook their heads no. She found some tin cups and poured a small cup of milk for each of the children to help calm them down. Once she got the box emptied she put the cat in the box and put him under the bed to stop him from getting stepped on further. She had to bite the insides of her lips to keep them from trembling. The sounds of the flack exploding in the air and the faint sounds of louder explosions that could only be exploding bombs could be heard in the distance.

She handed two of the blankets from the boxes to the group on the bed. Then made a bed of rolled up blankets on the table for the baby. It was cool in the shelter as it was underground so she distributed blankets to the rest.

"We brought the children back to London this summer from my Aunt's," Lady Grace, Lord Blackwell's daughter commented. "It's been quiet. We didn't see the need for them to stay in the country."

"I fear there will be many others in the same situation," Sybil said. "Are you feeling alright Tom?"

Tom was rubbing his chest and wincing slightly.

"Just indigestion. A little too much excitement, I think."

It turned out the other two women had husbands serving together in the navy. They were living together to cut expenses. It wasn't long and the baby fell asleep in its nest of blankets.

"She's sleeping," Sybil said when she looked at the infant. "Perhaps the children should try and do the same.

It was five hours before the all clear sounded and everyone headed back to their homes. Sybil let the cat out of the box before she caught up to Tom. When they got inside she noticed he was sweating and gasping for breath slightly. By the time she got him undressed and into bed she knew it was more than indigestion. She made a few telephone calls until she found one of the surgeons she worked with who was not on duty at the hospital who could come over. Their regular family doctor was busy with the current crisis as were the other three doctors she had called.

After he examined Tom, he asked Sybil to speak with him in the kitchen.

"How long has been complaining of chest pains?"

"Almost a week now," Sybil replied. "We thought it was indigestion."

"He's experiencing angina. His heart rate is irregular and there is a pronounced fluctuation on one of the valves. You would only notice it if you knew exactly what to listen for. My diagnosis is that he's having a mild heart attack. The only treatment is complete bed rest for the next six months, oxygen if the symptoms worsen and sedation. I have some sedatives with me I can leave with you. I'll write out a note for his employer. Your husband is seriously ill. He shouldn't be working."

Sybil slowly sank into a chair in the kitchen. She was shocked that she hadn't realized the situation was a serious as it was. Little was known about heart attacks, except that they were almost always fatal.

"You don't think he's going to die, do you?" Sybil asked the doctor. They had worked together long enough she trusted him to give her the truth.

"No, I don't think the episode is severe enough to be fatal," he replied. "Even if he is feeling well enough in a few days to be up and about, I would caution against over exertion or the next episode will most likely have dire consequences."

The doctor wrote out the letter for Tom's employer and a prescription for more sedatives.

"Good luck, Nurse Branson," he said before he left.

"Good night. Thank you for coming," Sybil replied as she closed the door and leaned against it. She sighed. What was she to do? She felt an overwhelming desire to run home to Downton and cry on her mother's shoulder. She pushed herself away from the door and squared her shoulders.

"We're going home to Downton," she said aloud to the empty hallway, "and Tom is going to get better."


	15. Uses

Uses

The next day Lord Blackwell stopped by to let Sybil know he was closing the London house and taking his daughter and grandchildren to his sister's in the country. He thanked her again for allowing his family to join them in their shelter the previous evening. He only stayed a few minutes, as they were soon to catch the train. The bombs had not targeted their area but the experience had been unsettling enough he did not want to take any chances. Sybil could still see the smoke from the fires in the distance from what she guessed were the docks and the factory districts when she looked out the upstairs windows.

Sybil had given Tom the sedatives and he slept through most of the day. She was busy making phone calls and preparing to close the house. She made a trip out to the shelter and gathered the items from the previous evening, packed them back into the boxes and took them inside. She went to the garage and did a thorough inventory of the amount of petrol they had stored in Gerry cans as well. They had been purchasing their petrol ration every week and storing it in Gerry cans incase they needed to leave the city quickly. The weekly petrol ration was only enough to get them to the outskirts of the city at best.

Tom woke up late that afternoon. Sybil told him the decision she had made while she sat and spooned soup into him.

"We're going to Downton," Sybil said. "I'm not taking no for an answer."

"I'm not that sick," Tom replied.

"Yes, you are. I'm not going to loose you."

"I can't leave work. Neither can you."

"Your work is now a moot point. Dr. Everson gave me a letter stating you require rest and are not fit to work for the next six months. I've already called them."

Tom made a sour face.

"Besides, you know how short staffed the Downton hospital is and Matthew has reopened the house as a convalescent home. Cousin Isobel is trying to manage things, but she's much too old. They're really struggling. I can work at the hospital and I won't be serving hot drinks to any _randy officers_," she teased. Years before Tom had been jealous and referred to the patients at the Downton hospital as a bunch of randy officers. She had never let him forget it.

"When are you planning on this great move?" he said still being grumpy.

"I was thinking the day after tomorrow. I'll put you on the train and I'll drive up with the car."

"What? No, I'll drive."

"No you won't," Sybil said silencing his protests with a spoonful of soup.

"I'm not going on the train like some kind of invalid."

"Fine, we'll drive up to Downton and take our time. I'll drive the car."

"Fine, then. We'll take the car and I'll drive!"

Sybil had about enough of Tom's bad temper. He was always like this when he was sick. She got him another sedative and waited while he took it. Then went to wash up and continue with her packing.

The night before they were set to leave the sirens started to wail yet again in the early evening. Sybil got Tom up and shoved the pillow and comforter under her arm as they headed to the shelter in the garden. She had just enough time to get back to the house, grab their gas masks and one of the cases of blankets before the barrage of anti-aircraft fire started. The cat ran into the shelter and shot under the bed before she closed the door.

"Even the cat has had enough," she said before she made the bed and curled up on the mattress beside Tom to wait out the attack.

The next morning by the time they had the car loaded, the cat in a box with holes cut in it in the back seat, the top up on the car and securely fastened and the extra Gerry cans of petrol strapped to the back of the car Tom was worn out. When Sybil returned from locking the house, she found Tom sitting in the passenger seat waiting for her. She pulled a pillow and blanket from the back seat and gave it to him before they set off. By the time they had cleared the city he was leaning against the pillow fast asleep. The mewing coming from the back seat was starting to get on Sybil's nerves. She stopped for a few minutes and reached in the back to stroke the cat. Buttons had other ideas and hopped out of the box to perch himself in the back window. Half way to Downton it started to rain. Sybil stopped at a fueling station and used their ration cards to get their petrol allotment. They stopped at a teashop for two mugs of tea, then broke out the sandwiches she had packed.

"Are you feeling up to the rest of the trip?" Sybil asked Tom. "We could stop over."

"I'm right enough. Besides I slept through the first half. What would we do with the cat? We can't leave him in the car overnight. Did you pack my typewriter?"

"No, I did not. When we get to my mother's your going to rest, not work."

"I can't sit around and do nothing."

"You can and you will. When you are well enough to tend my mother's rose bushes you can think about work."

"It's fall. They won't need tending until spring."

"Precisely," Sybil replied before she gave him a quick kiss.

They arrived at the Dower House worn out from the drive. The further north they had traveled the more winding the roads had been. The rain had made the drive even more difficult. By the time Sybil had the cat locked in the garden shed with something to eat, the car unloaded and Tom settled in bed she was thinking of the days of living with servants with a nostalgic longing. It would have been so easy to arrive by train and have someone else drive the car and tend to the luggage.

Sybil spent the next few days catching up on the happenings at Downton and talking to Major Beasley who was now running the Downton hospital about coming to work there.

"We can certainly use more nurses," he told her. "What brings you to this area?" He had no idea who she was in relationship to the local nobility.

"My husband was taken ill and requires complete bed rest. We've come to rejoin my family. I worked at this hospital as an auxiliary nurse during the Great War. I've been working as a surgical nurse in London for the last ten years, five of them as head surgical matron."

Just then Isobel Crawley came into the hospital entrance. He hair was completely white and she was leaning heavily on her walking stick.

"Sybil, I was hoping to run into you today," she said.

"How nice to see you Cousin Isobel," Sybil replied.

"Major Beasley, I see you've met Lady Sybil, or I should say Nurse Branson. When I heard she was moving back I was overjoyed. I was hoping you would take over as Chair of the Board, Sybil."

"I will work in whatever position Major Beasley finds most suitable," Sybil said taking a step back from her family history. "I was thinking more along the lines of surgical nursing or managing the nursing staff as that is what my experience would be best suited to."

"I'll leave the Board of Directors to you ladies," Major Beasley said. "I am in desperate need of a head nurse. When will you be able to start, Lady Sybil?"

"Please call me Nurse Branson, Major I would be available the day after tomorrow if that is agreeable to you."

"Yes, perfectly."

Cousin Isobel was beaming at the prospect of having someone of Sybil's experience working at the hospital. She was eager to show Sybil around. By the time Sybil left she had a mental note of areas that could use some modernization and some areas where efficiency could be improved.

The Abbey was different than when her parents had lived there and yet the same. Mary and Matthew were in residence and the lower floor was set up much as it had been during the Great War with a noticeable absence of maids. Military personnel performed all of the tasks and the kitchen had been outfitted with an electric range. The biggest difference of note was to the lands of the estate. The farmland that was left after Lord Grantham had settled his debts was leased to the Women's Land Army. The cottages that had once housed the estate workers served as quarters for the women and the lawns of the Abbey were dotted with sheep.

The Agricultural Authority had been set up to ensure agricultural production was maximized during the war. Edith had more than one run in with the man running the local authority. Sir Anthony was now approaching seventy and slowing down considerably. Edith had been assuming more and more responsibility for the running of his estate and was overseeing the use of Mary and Matthew's rented farmlands as well. At times she wondered if the man from the land authority had ever run a farm in his life, or had any concept of the difficulties of moving time sensitive crops to market. A week after Sybil and Tom arrived back in Downton the annoying man was back on Mary's doorstep and determined to make trouble.

"We've determined by the regulations you have entirely too much pasture land on the estate. I demand you plow the one hundred and twenty acres of pasture on the north side of the estate and put it into crop production by spring," he said. The agricultural authority representative was a middle-aged man with red hair and a ginger mustache. He had a protruding stomach. In Mary's opinion he was one of the rabble who was now in a position of authority due to the war and had developed an inflated importance of his value in life and his own opinions.

"That land has been used as pasture for seven generations of my family," Mary said looking down her nose at the man standing on the stoop. She was not about to let him set foot inside the Abbey. "Under no circumstances will it be plowed under now or at any time in the future."

"I have official documents from the Land Authority Office."

"And I have right of ownership," Mary informed him. "These are not publicly held lands. You have no right to dictate their use to my husband or our tenants."

"I have every right," the annoying man stammered, his face turning bright red.

"I will relay your _documents_ to my husband. I can assure you, we will not be complying with such a clearly ridiculous order," Mary said before she shut the door in his face.

Mary turned fuming from the door. The family may not have been in the exalted position it once was in the county, but the land was their heritage. Her father had always said they were caretakers and now as the Countess Grantham and mother of the next Earl she understood his meaning all too well. The tradition of the land was what gave the family its position not wealth. It was theirs to care for and to provide for the members of the county in good times and bad. During the last war the estate had supported well over one hundred and fifty families. While it no longer provided directly to the inhabitants of the village, the tenants and the local community who worked in the agricultural industry and the support services they required were still tied to the estate as much as they had ever been.

"Legally we can't defy the order," Matthew said during a family get together that weekend at his Mother-in-laws. The family was in an uproar over the Land Authority order and everyone was trying to think of a way around it.

"I can't get anywhere with the annoying little snipe," Edith said. She was clearly irritated.

"Edith! Language," her mother admonished.

"I'm sorry Mama, but that man is absolutely abdominal. He was by our place the other day and informed me I had too many dairy cows. The man is completely ridiculous. We had a very good hay crop this year and have more than enough feed. He has absolutely no idea of what he is talking about."

"Perhaps your argument is political rather than legal," Tom volunteered from the armchair.

"How so?" Matthew questioned.

"You have historical precedent on your side. If you presented a speech in front of the agricultural board pointing out the existence of the pasture through every major conflict in British history back to the 1600's you could easily win the argument."

"Who amongst us could pull that off?" Mary questioned. "I slammed the door in the man's face and Edith has had more than one run in with the man."

"I could," Sybil said. "I haven't been a political wife for all these years without learning a few things and I've never met the man."

"I'll write the speech. I'll have it for you tomorrow," Tom volunteered.

"You will not!" Sybil retorted. "You are to rest, not work. I will write the speech. You may check it over for grammatical errors."

"You're going to kill me with boredom," Tom gripped. His illness had made him irritable and he wasn't used to being still for so long.

"Keep it up and I'll sedate you," Sybil threatened with a sweet smile before she turned back to the rest of the family. "Now tell me any details you can think of that we should present to the Authority."


	16. A Member of the Little People

A Member of the Little People

"I'd swear Buttons is homesick," Tom told Sybil when she got home from her shift at the Downton hospital.

"What makes you say that?" she asked.

"He spends his days sleeping on the running board of the car or staring at me from the end of the bed."

"He slept on the running board of the car at home," Sybil said with a chuckle. "You were always at work, so you didn't notice. Did you have a chance to look over my speech today?"

"I made some changes."

"I hope you didn't over do things."

"I worked on it while laying in bed. Does that satisfy you?"

"Yes," Sybil said leaning over to kiss him.

Lady Cora arrived home a short while later. She was as graceful and calm as ever although from her white hair and the lines on her face it was obvious her age was catching up to her. She was busy with volunteer work in the village.

"Downton will be receiving a group of evacuee children from London in a few days," she told them. "We have to find suitable places for them all. Every home in the village will have at least one or two."

"Are you planning to have any here, Mama?" Sybil asked.

"I was thinking with Tom sick we shouldn't take any."

"Nonsense," Tom chimed in. "Take as many as the house will hold. Keeping an eye on them while you're both out will give me something to do."

"What do you think Sybil?"

"Tom is rather bored and the children will most likely be at school through the day. I don't see why you shouldn't take one or two."

"How are things at the hospital?" Lady Cora inquired.

"Busy but not as frantic as London. I have more direct contact with the patients here which I missed at my last post."

"I hope their behaving themselves," Tom said frowning slightly.

"Tom, I'm old enough to be their mother in most cases," Sybil said when she sensed the direction his thoughts were going.

"You're still the prettiest nurse at the hospital," he said.

"In your eyes," Sybil said with a laugh. "I best go and get changed."

The Agricultural Authority had a monthly meeting of its directors and Sybil was ready to do battle. Tom got ready and accompanied her as did the entire Crawley clan including Mary and Matthew and their two children. Word had spread in the village that the Crawley's planned to defy the Authority's orders and every farmer from the surrounding area was in attendance. They all had about enough of the Authority's interference in their livelihoods. There wasn't a one of them who hadn't had a run in with Mr. Sanders the ginger haired know it all.

Sybil waited for her turn to speak with a straight back. Her chin was up and she was every bit the aristocrat she was born to be. Three of the local farmers got up to complain about the orders they had received and all were quickly dismissed. When it was Sybil's turn to speak she moved to the front of the hall with all the grace she could muster. There was a collective gasp from those who remembered her grandmother as they could have sworn the old lady had risen from the grave and was standing before them.

Sybil's speech took the form of a history lecture, documenting the use of the land on her family's estate since the time of the hundred years war and the reliance of the local population on it's continued existence. When the annoying Mr. Sanders attempted to interrupt her, she silenced him with a steely glance.

"In conclusion, Ladies and Gentlemen of the Authority, I can only surmise that this war will come to pass as every other conflict in the history of this Island has before. Our strength as a nation comes from our land and its traditions. The pastures of the Downton Abbey Estate have served this community and country for as far back as recorded history and beyond and must be allowed to continue for posterity."

As Sybil moved to retake her seat everyone in the audience rose to their feet to give her a standing ovation. Mr. Sanders face looked like a beet that was about to explode and other members of the Committee had the look of total shock on their faces. Finally the head of the Committee spoke, repealing the order.

As they stepped outside after the meeting everyone gathered around to congratulate Sybil and gave her three cheers. Sybil accepted their praise graciously.

"I can't accept all of the accolades," she told them. "My husband helped me a great deal with the speech."

"You should run for the local seat," someone in the crowd told her.

"I couldn't possibly," Sybil replied, "but thank you for the vote of confidence. My husband's health is my priority at the moment."

When the crowd finally broke up, they headed back to the car. Tom wasn't up to the walk yet and they had driven to the meeting.

"You could easily run and take the seat in this area," Tom told her.

"You were certainly a hit," her mother commented.

"I'm happy working at the hospital. I don't have any political aspirations. That has always been Tom's talent. He rewrote my speech. Without him the results might have been quite different."

"It was you not the fancy speech writing that made you a success, love," Tom said. "You need to think about it."

Two days after the Authority meeting the children from London arrived. The city was being bombed with no specific pattern and it was impossible to predict where they would land or when they would fall. Homes, schools and shops had been destroyed as well as factories and the docks. The children were being evacuated to the country and placed with families. Lady Cora showed up with three children and dropped them off with Tom, before she headed out to continue with the placements.

There were two boys aged eight and six and a younger girl aged five. The children were from a poorer family and had only a small bag of cloths with them each that contained a change of underwear and pajamas.

"Are you a leprechaun?" the little girl asked Tom. Her eyes had gone round when she heard his accent. She had never met anyone with an Irish accent before.

"Don't be silly Lilly," John, the eldest boy scolded his sister. "Leprechauns are little people."

"How would you know?" Tom asked him with a twinkle in his eye. "Have you ever seen one?"

"You are one then?" The little girl's eyes got even bigger. Billy, the middle boy gulped.

"Maybe I am," Tom replied. "One who likes to tell fairy stories."

The children were all speechless. He laughed before he showed them where their rooms would be.

It turned out the boys had not been to school that year as their school had been bombed in one of the first raids. They were all apprehensive and quiet from their arrival. Tom went out to the garden shed to see what remained of his children's toys and then sent them outside to play until it was time to eat. The children quickly started to loose their nervousness when they saw the pile of jump ropes, balls and hoops he got out for them to play with.

"Now mind you stay inside the gate," he told them. "And stay out of the rose bushes."

"Yes, Mr. Branson," they all chimed. They were so busy examining the toys they almost forgot he was there.

That night there were tears and multiple trips to the bathroom and requests for glasses of water before the children were finally settled.

"Tom, whatever possessed you to tell the children you were a leprechaun?" Sybil said giving his shoulder a slight punch when she finally got into bed that night.

"It seemed like a good idea at the time," he said with a chuckle, "It got their mind off things.

"The little girl was convinced you were going to come in the night and put a spell on them."

"Just think, Riordan will get married soon and we could be grandparents in a few years. This will be good practice. I almost forgot what it's like to have a little girl in the house."

"Or little boys who get into everything. I'm afraid you're going to have your hands full. Mama had a nanny for us when we were small. She will be lost."

"Give you mother some credit. She'll adapt. She saw ours often enough."

"Only for short visits when they were young. It's different when you have children in the house full time."

"Go to sleep. You worry too much," Tom said pulling her close and placing a kiss on her lips.

The next day Lady Cora and Tom walked the three children to the village school. It was only a short distance from the house. The school was a hive of activity as all of the new children had to be registered and placed in the appropriate classes. After they got the boys registered Lady Cora headed to see Mary to go through her son's out grown clothing and see if there was anything appropriate for the boys. Tom was left on his own with Lilly.

"Now, then," he said. "Let's go for a walk to the village."

Lilly had found herself a stick and was busy waving it around as a fairy wand. They stopped at a general mercantile and went in. He told the lady behind the desk to find a dress for the little girl. He wasn't impressed with the dress Lilly was wearing and it looked entirely too tight to him. The woman behind the desk picked out a dress and had Lilly try it on. When Lilly came out of the change room the dress fit her but Lilly looked downcast.

"Do you have another color?" Tom inquired.

The woman produced two more dresses.

"Which one do you like?" Tom asked Lilly.

She hid behind his legs and shyly pointed to one of the dresses.

"Alright try it on," he said.

Lilly brightened up considerably when she got on the light blue dress. While Tom was waiting to pay for the dress he noticed Lilly looking distractedly at something in the shop.

"What is it you see?" he asked her. She hid behind his legs again.

He went over to the area she had been staring at to find a collection of dolls in frilly dresses on the shelves. He got one down and held it toward Lilly. She hid further behind him.

"Do you think this one might like to come and stay at the house too?"

She nodded while peeking out from behind him.

When Sybil got home from work that day she found Lilly happily wrapping the doll in one of her mother's best dresser scarves in middle of the drawing room floor. Tom was fast asleep in an armchair, with the newspaper open to the cartoon strip.

"Come along Lilly, it's time to get your brothers from school," Sybil said. "Did you have fun today?"

"Tom got me a dress and a doll and we made biscuits," she happily told Sybil. "Tomorrow he's going to show me how to fix the car. Tom doesn't snore half as loud as my Daddy."

"So he went for a nap?"

"He said all leprechauns sleep in the afternoon. I didn't know that."

Sybil just shook her head and laughed. Her husband was as full of the blarney as day she met him.


	17. A Practiced Smile

A Practiced Smile

Lilly was so completely taken with Tom she became his tail. No matter what he said, she was convinced it was written in stone. The boys were a bit behind in their studies as they hadn't been to school all winter. Evenings were taken up with having the boys practice their reading and doing homework. One evening Tom announced the children needed to practice so they could put on a skit for the family at Christmas. They had heard from their own children and all three would be coming to visit for a few days over the holidays. Tom and Sybil had always read to their own children and putting on skits had been a favorite part of their holidays.

"I want the skit to have a leprechaun in it," Lilly announced.

"You'll have to decide among you," Sybil told them. "John can write the skit down and you can all practice."

They hadn't seen Merilee for over a year. When she arrived at her Grandmother's they were all shocked. The impetuous teenager that had left London a year and a half ago was gone. Merilee now had her father's determination and a presence when she entered a room that rivaled Sybil's own.

"I'm booked for flight school for February when I turn eighteen," she told Tom and Sybil one evening after the young children had been sent to bed. "I don't know where I will be going afterwards."

"Try and get somewhere safe," Tom said.

"There isn't anywhere safe, Da. They've bombed the airfield three times already where I'm at."

One look at Tom's face told Sybil he was already starting to get upset over Merilee's statement.

"Any young men on the horizon, yet?" Sybil inquired to change the subject.

"I hope you're not cavorting around with the flyers. I remember what they were like in the last war," Tom said.

"Honestly, where would I find a flyer my own age in the ATA," Merilee replied. "They're all positively ancient. Most of them flew in the Great War. One of them at the field has one permanently crossed eye. He always lands on one wheel. Why don't you ask Jay what he's been up to in Scotland?"

Jay would be finishing up his studies in Electrical Engineering in the spring. He had already been offered a post working for the War Department at a remote research facility in Scotland doing top-secret work.

"Why are you pointing the finger at me?" he said a trifle too quickly.

"Because of the way you flush when you look at that picture you keep in your wallet," Merilee taunted. The two of them had always teased each other relentlessly.

"Maybe I was just too warm."

"Too warm, thinking about how you're going to teach her to speak Gaeilge."

"She speaks Gaelic and there's nothing official yet." Jay realized too late that his sister had taunted him into blurting out the truth and blushed profusely.

"Merilee stop pestering your brother," Tom said. "He'll tell the family about his girl friend when he's good and ready."

"She's not my girl friend yet," Jay said still blushing.

"Just don't wait too long to ask her," Sybil said. "It took your father two years to get up the nerve to ask me. He should have asked me a lot sooner."

"Would you have said yes any sooner?" Tom replied cocking an eyebrow at her.

"Perhaps," Sybil said with a grin.

With the extra children at each house and everyone home for Christmas the holiday was hectic.

"Are you a leprechaun too?" Lilly had asked Jay when she first saw him.

"What has my Da been telling you?" Jay asked her with a wide grin.

"He said leprechauns could charm cats."

Jay always been Button's favorite human and was busy winding himself around Jay's legs from the second Jay had arrived.

"Well now, maybe they can," Jay said winking at his father.

Sybil had to remind Tom more than once not to overdo things. Riordan asked to speak to his parents privately before he left. He was heading out for basic officer training right after the holidays.

"Mum, Da, I was wondering if Janine and I could live at the house in London after we are married?"

"You may live at the house under one condition," Sybil said. "You will need to assume the expense of running the house yourself. It is the same condition your father and I had when we took the house over from your grandfather. I don't think we'll be moving back to London in the near future."

"Are you sure you want to take your bride to London, son? The reports of the air raids are not good."

"There hasn't been much in the way of damage in the old neighborhood. The house is already set up. I was thinking of maybe having another couple live with us. That is as long as you don't have any objections. It's not like the house doesn't have the room."

"Just as long as you're careful who you have in the house, you can please yourself," Tom replied. "Your mother left some supplies in the pantry incase we decided to go back. Right now we're happy to stay here."

Over the rest of the winter Tom's health seemed to improved slightly. He was able to walk around the village and kept busy puttering around the house and keeping an eye on Lilly when he wasn't resting. Easter fell in April of 1941. Sybil and Lady Cora had the children dye Easter eggs. They them took to Edith and Sir Anthony's on Easter Sunday for an egg hunt in their garden. On Easter Tuesday the bombs fell on Belfast. For Tom it was the most devastating blow of the war as reports of the casualties and evacuees flooding over the border into the Irish Free State came in. The same day the Germans bombed northern Dublin killing ninety.

"Tom, you have to stop listening to the radio. You're getting much too upset. You're not doing yourself any good," Sybil scolded him while they were laying in bed.

"I hate those damn nazis," he said. "The Republic is neutral and they still bombed them."

"No one likes the war," Sybil said stroking the side of his face with the back of her fingers.

"I want to go home."

"We can't go back to London. It isn't safe."

"I don't mean London. I mean Ireland. I want to go back to Ireland."

"You're in no condition to make that kind of move," Sybil said rolling on her back and staring at the ceiling.

"I know that. When I'm better and this damn war is done. We're going home."

"We've talked about going back since the children were little. We've always said when they were grown and on their own. It seems like there is always something in the way. We can't leave Mama alone with the evacuee children."

"No, we can't," Tom said. He took her hand and held it against his chest. "We will go though when it's time."

The bombs stopped falling on London as quickly as they had started at the end of May as the German war effort shifted its focus to the Russian front. The end of the school year came, as did the children's mother. She had found a post in a small village where they had relatives who ran a hotel. There was room for her and the children.

"Goodbye Tom," Lilly said throwing her arms around his legs and hugging him. "If you ever want to share your pot of gold you could come and find me."

"I'll remember that," he said as he hugged her back.

The three children all leaned out of the windows of the third class coach and waved as the train pulled away from the station.

"You'll be bored now with nothing to do all day," Sybil said to Tom as they walked back to the Dower House.

"Actually, it's a relief to see them back with their mother. I'm a little tired."

"Tom. Are you feeling all right? Have you been overdoing it?"

"Maybe just a little. I think I need to rest."

He hadn't mentioned anything to Sybil. He didn't want her to worry. Ever since the bombing of Belfast from mid-April to the beginning part of May, he was feeling the odd twinge in his chest. When they got back to the house he changed into his pajamas, took a sedative and went to bed.

"Is Tom feeling under the weather?" her mother asked. "He hasn't gone to bed in the daytime since before Christmas."

"I think he's worn out," Sybil said. "He needs quiet. I was thinking we should keep the papers away from him. He frets over the news. It's not doing him any good."

"Isn't there anymore we can do for him?"

"I'm afraid we have very few options. We wouldn't have gotten a diagnosis if Dr. Everson hadn't known exactly what to look for. Heart conditions are extremely hard to diagnose. We could try oxygen. I'll ask Major Beasley to stop by tomorrow."

The next morning Tom got up and had breakfast with Lady Cora then headed straight back to bed. Major Beasley stopped by and examined him later that morning. The doctor stayed in the room with Tom for sometime before he came out and made his excuses to Lady Cora.

"What did he have to say?" Lady Cora asked Tom. He was lying in bed looking even more tired than he had at breakfast.

"He says I need rest," Tom replied. "Maybe some oxygen to perk me up. He'll arrange it with Sybil. I'll be right as rain in no time."

"I'll let you rest," Lady Cora said. She knew Tom well enough to know he was not telling her something.

Major Beasley called Sybil into his office when he returned to the hospital and closed the door behind her.

"Mrs. Branson," he began. "There is no easy way to say this. Your husband's heart is failing. With the severity of his arrhythmia I'm surprised he has lived this long."

Sybil felt herself go stone cold. She didn't know whether to stay and talk to the doctor or run home this instant. She took a deep breath to steady herself.

"Your husband doesn't want anyone told. I felt it would be unkind to you to withhold the information. Due to our professional relationship you can understand the position he has put me in."

Sybil nodded her head. She had been present when numerous families were told their loved one wasn't going to make it. She had a new appreciation of the devastation the news was having on her heart.

"How long?" she asked.

"With oxygen therapy and rest I would say the end of the year. He will have to avoid stress and be careful not to over exert himself. I wish there was something else I could tell you."

"Thank you for your candor, Doctor."

"Take the rest of the day off and tomorrow as well. You'll need time to let this sink in."

Sybil rose to go and headed out onto the wards in a fog. She collected an oxygen kit and cylinder to take home with her. As she was passing through the hospital she stopped at the door to the morgue and looked at the sheet draped bodies. She had faced death so many times since she began her career in nursing over twenty years ago. She had held their hands as they died and comforted their families. She had worried herself almost sick during the first war that Tom would be called up and killed. Now it had come full circle. It wasn't the enemy at the gates that was going to take him from her. It was the enemy within.

When she got back to the Dower House she squared her shoulders and plastered a smile on her face as she had done so many times in drawing rooms, ball rooms and political parties over the years. She reached for the doorknob to the bedroom.

"I'm home early, darling and I've brought you a present," she said. "How are you feeling this afternoon?"

"I'm feeling a lot better," Tom said. "I'll be back up by tomorrow. The doctor said it was nothing to worry about."

"I have tomorrow off. The shifts had to be changed at the last minute."

"Let's take the car and visit some of our old haunts. It will be like when we were first engaged."

"I'd like that," Sybil said while she set up the oxygen. From here on she was going to make every second count.


	18. A Summer's Day

A Summer's Day

"Don't you have to get up to go to work?" Tom asked Sybil one morning about a week after Major Beasley had been to see him. He woke up to find her still in bed long after the time she usually left in the mornings.

"I'm not going to work. I've taken a leave of absence. It's been so hectic these last few years. I wanted some time for just us."

"Sybil." Tom said in an irritated voice, "They need you."

"There is always going to be someone who needs nursing. It isn't going to change whether I am there or not. I need some time off. It's a moot point. It's already arranged."

"Well this is a fine how do you do. With neither of us working, what are you planning to do for money?"

"There's a small matter of my settlement. After twenty years it's time to use it," Sybil rolled out of bed and got her housecoat. She turned the oxygen on and handed Tom the mask. "You stay here and take your oxygen. I'll go make some breakfast. I was just thinking how breakfast in bed would be nice for a change."

"I don't want you using your settlement. You need to save it."

"For what? A rainy day? You're forgetting I'm a well off woman who always gets her own way. Now stop arguing and put the mask on."

Tom sighed and put the mask on his face. Sybil returned with their breakfast on a tray and sat crossed legged on the bed while she ate.

"This reminds me of when Rory got shot back in Dublin and you were shoveling the food into him. He kept trying to protest and you kept pushing it in his mouth," Tom commented.

"That was a long time ago. It seems like another lifetime."

"He's a good man. You can count on him."

"I know. He's practically our son." Sbyil reached out with a napkin to wipe some crumbs from the side of Tom's face. He reached up and stilled her hand.

"He's not our son, you know. He's forty years old. Almost the same age as you."

"Tom, what have you got into your head?" Sybil said with a slight laugh while shaking her head.

"Nothing. It's just a thought," he said. "What are you planning to do today?"

"I was going to check if there are any strawberries ready. Maybe work around the garden."

"I'll come out with you." Tom raised a hand to stop her protests. "I'll sit on a chair and watch you if I get tired."

The summer went by quickly, too quickly for Sybil. They spent their days going for picnics and visiting places that held special memories for them. The made love as often as Tom's failing health would allow. Neither wanted to voice the fact that they knew each time could be their last. Sybil was storing away the memory of each day like a precious gift.

Letters were opened and read aloud with Sybil sitting on the side of the bed while Tom rested and took his oxygen. Rory wrote to say he had been busy most of the spring and summer with the evacuees from Belfast. The northern hospitals had been overwhelmed. The local hospital had opened its doors to the casualties. Things were starting to calm down. Mrs. Shay from Ballybunion had moved in as his housekeeper after her husband died. He was busy with the place and keeping the boys away from the door who had developed an eye for his twelve-year-old daughter Kathy.

Merilee and Jay both wrote regularly. Merilee was stationed near Sheffield and now had the job of flying the transatlantic route ferrying planes from Newfoundland. Jay was happy enough in Scotland and was putting in long hours at work. He didn't mention his girlfriend but did comment on the local dances he had attended.

Riordan and Janine had been down once to visit for a few days. Things in London were quiet. The city was busy digging out from the bombings. They had decided to reopen part of the upstairs. There were a number of people staying on the lower floor that Jay knew through his work, as housing was at a premium in London. Janine was busy managing the house and volunteering at the Red Cross. She was not eager to take on a full time job as they were hoping for children right away.

"Da is not going to get better, is he?" Riordan asked his mother when he got her alone outside.

"No, he's not," Sybil answered. "He doesn't want a fuss."

Riordan let out the breath he had been holding.

"Have you told the others?"

"Not yet."

"Do you know how long he's got?"

"The doctor thinks it could be sometime around the end of the year. Your father is putting on a brave face. I haven't let on I know yet."

"Is there anything that can be done?"

"Nothing. His heart was never strong. It kept him out of the first war. We were married before his conscription notice arrived, but it wouldn't have made any difference. His heart was bad enough to keep him from military duty."

"Do you need me to do anything, Mum?"

"Can you take Buttons home with you? Your father is convinced the cat is homesick. He keeps mentioning it."

"I can do that," Riordan said. He gave his mother a hug.

Sybil dabbed her eyes before they headed back in.

"Remember, not a word," she cautioned Riordan before they went back inside the house.

"I wondered where you two had gotten off to," Tom said. He was almost always in the armchair in the drawing room these days when he wasn't lying down.

"Riordan has decided to take Buttons back to London with him," Sybil said kissing Tom's cheek.

"Good that cat keeps looking at me asking to go home."

"Are you sure he's not just looking for something to eat," Sybil said.

"Positive," Tom replied. "He keeps trying to lead me to the car. He wants to leave."

"The next thing you'll be telling me he can spell out words in the sand with his paw," Sybil said with a laugh.

As the summer faded into fall, Tom's health faded with it. One day at the end of September Sybil was sitting by the side of the bed reading letters while Tom was taking his oxygen. Tom took the mask off slowly and suddenly spoke.

"It's been a grand adventure hasn't it? Our time together."

"Tom don't talk like that. You're going to pull through."

"We both know that's not going to happen. It's time to stop pretending."

"Alright. I'll write to the children."

"No. I want them to remember me like I was. Not like this."

"Tom…"

"No, listen to me Sybil." He had to pause to catch his breath. "I don't want you to grieve for too long. Find someone who loves you and you can love in return. You're still a young woman."

"I can't. Tom, don't talk like that. You're the only man for me. You always have been" the tears were starting to stream down Sybil's cheeks.

"If we had given in to society's pressure all those years ago, we wouldn't be here now. I've tried to make you happy."

"You have. I wouldn't trade a second of our life together."

"Going back to Ireland was a nice dream. Wasn't it?"

"It was."

"Maybe you'll make it happen," he said barely above a whisper. "Tell the children I love them." He paused. "Tell them to live their lives to the fullest."

"I will," Sybil said nodding her head.

Tom reached his hand up weakly to draw Sybil down to lie across him.

"I love you, my darling," he rasped out.

"I love you with all my heart," Sybil replied.

She lay across her husband's chest for a long time with his still arm draped across her back. When the tears finally stopped she got up, turned off the oxygen and covered the mirror with a throw. She looked back at his silent form once more before she went to tell her mother the news.

The next week passed in a haze for Sybil. People came and went. Funeral arrangements were made with the priest from York coming to Downton to perform the service. They were all vague shadows in the fog of her grief. Her heart was broken. At times it felt as though the blood would flow out of her body through her feet and into the ground. Her responses and actions were automatic with no conscious thought to what she was doing. She held her daughter while she wept and consoled her sons but her own tears didn't come.

Riordan being the stoic practical one of her children managed to get a few days leave to put his father's affairs in order. He went through his father's will and started the process of transferring his father's accounts to Sybil's name. While he was packing up the oxygen cylinder to return it to the hospital, he opened the drawer of the nightstand to see if the tool he needed to loosen the regulator was in the drawer. In the drawer were two letters in his father's hand. One addressed to Sybil and the other Rory. Underneath them was an old copy of Peter and Wendy by J.M. Barrie.

He took the letters and book and went to find his mother.

"I found these in the bedroom," he said as he handed them to his mother.

"Rory sent word he can't get away right now. He is going to come later for a visit," Lady Cora said. She was sitting with Sybil in the drawing room trying to get her to eat something.

"I wish he was here," Sybil said quietly. She handed the envelope for Rory back to Riordan. "Could you take care of this?"

"Certainly Mum. I'll send it in the afternoon post."

"I wanted to give you something," Sybil said. She went to get the keys for the car and placed them in Riordan's hand.

"I'm not going to take your car Mum."

"I can't maintain it. It was your father's pride and joy. You and Janine can use it. Do as you wish with it. I have no more use for it. There are too many memories."

"The pain will fade in time, dear," her mother said quietly.

"I know that, Mama," Sybil replied. "I want Riordan to have the car. He knows how to take care of it."

Riordan sighed and took the keys from her.

"Have you given any thought to what you might do with yourself now?" he asked her.

"I'll go back to work here at the hospital in another week until I decide," Sybil said. She was running her finger along the edge of the letter Tom had left her. She placed it inside the book and set it to the side.

"Riordan, let's go for a drive over to the estate. There is an old orchard, I suddenly have an overwhelming desire to see," Sybil said to her son.

He nodded and went to get his hat.

Standing inside the gate of the orchard with her oldest child, Sybil surveyed the scene before her. The leaves had fallen from the trees and covered the ground in a carpet of yellow and brown. The bare branches of the trees reached up towards the sky. Birds hopped among the branches tweeting and pecking at the odd left over insect.

"Your father always loved it here," she said. "He said it was like a secret garden. If you listened carefully enough you could hear the fairies dancing in the trees."

"He would say something fanciful like that," Riordan replied.

"One of the last things he said was to tell you to live your life to the fullest. Don't let the house and responsibility tie you down. Do what's in your heart."

"I will Mum."

"He'll never be dead as long as you and your brother are alive. He loved you."

"He love you too, Mum."

"He did. He still does," Sybil replied. "Wherever his is now, he still does."


	19. Forever

Forever

Work became Sybil's salvation. She went to work in the mornings and stayed long after her shift was done. She fell into bed exhausted every night to get up and repeat it again the next day. Her appetite had faded to almost nothing and she answered inquiries about her health with a routine. "I'm doing well. It's very busy at work."

"She can't keep up like this," Lady Cora told Mary and Edith one day just before Christmas. "She is going to harm herself."

"She is grieving, Mama. In time she will settle down," Mary replied.

"You understand her situation better than either of us," Edith added. "Neither of us has lost a husband."

"My husband was not a young man when he died," Lady Cora replied. "He lived a full life. He lived to see his grandchildren. I have no regrets."

"She chose him against everyone's wishes," Mary said. "Even though we did accept him later, it couldn't have been easy for her all those years loving him enough to defy her family."

"He was a good husband and father," Lady Cora agreed. "She's missing him so much. It's as though part of her has died with him."

"I think she'll come out of it eventually," Edith said. "Although I doubt she'll ever be the same."

"No one is ever the same after something like this," Lady Cora said softly.

The Americans entered the war at the beginning of December. As the war effort increased the extreme stress was taken off the smaller rural hospitals. In early January Major Beasley insisted Sybil take a week off.

"You are clearly exhausted, Nurse Branson. You need to take time off. You haven't given yourself time to recover from your loss."

"I need to work, Major," Sybil replied.

"No, you need to rest. Give yourself some time to process things. You won't be of any use if you collapse. Go home and get some sleep."

Sybil walked the short way back to the Dower House after her shift. She arrived to find the house deserted. She went to her room and got changed. She had changed bedrooms after Tom's death and hadn't been back to the room they had shared since her son's had packed up his clothes and personal items. She leaned her head against the door and took a few breaths before she turned the nob and went in.

The bed was made and the curtains stood open. There was no trace of the time they had spent there together except for the framed picture of Sybil and her family on the dresser. Sybil looked at the image of her husband staring back at her. The unfairness of loosing him when he was only fifty-one felt like a boulder pressing on her. This wasn't supposed to be how it worked. He should have lived till they were old and dangled their grandchildren on his knee. She ran a hand across the now cool pillow where he had slept before she turned off the light and left the room.

She went to her own room and curled up on the bed. She opened the drawer of the nightstand and regarded the book and letter that lay there. She hadn't opened his letter to her. By putting off reading his last words, it seemed as though she was keeping the last goodbye at bay. "Perhaps it is time," Sybil thought. Her mother and sisters where worried about her. She hadn't responded to the cards she had received at Christmas. Her hand passed over the letter and reached for the book instead.

Inside the front cover was a note in Tom's handwriting. She ran her fingers over the script before she read it.

_He wrote this when the woman he loved was dying. I read this to Jay when he was young. It has new meaning now. Living with you has been an awfully big adventure. The next adventure is just beginning._

_Tom_

Sybil got her hanky and dabbed her eyes before she turned to the first page and started to read. Tom had marked passages in the book. As she read she realized there was another meaning to the story than she remembered as a little girl. She heard her mother enter the house but continued to read. She only stopped when her mother called her for their evening meal.

"Dr. Beasley insisted I take a week off," Sybil told her mother.

"What were you doing?"

"Just catching up on some reading."

"There are a few letters. I think there is one from Rory."

"I'll look at them later," Sybil said. "Just leave them on the side board."

She returned to her room and continued reading until she had turned the last page. When she was finished it was past midnight. She laid the book down slowly and turned out the light.

The next morning Sybil got up, washed and dressed and went through the mail. Rory would be attending a medical conference in Dublin in March and was planning to take the ferry over for a short visit. Kathy would be staying home with Mrs. Shay. He didn't want her to miss school. The rest of his letter was general chitchat about the people Sybil had met on her trips over the years.

Merilee had written to say she had met an American air traffic controller. She would bring him to meet the family when they could both arrange leave at the same time. Sybil's hands dropped to her lap when she read the news. Her youngest child was truly growing up. It wouldn't be long before she was married with a family of her own.

Sybil put away the letters then got ready to accompany her mother to the village. Lady Cora was working on a fundraiser for the local hospital. Sybil though she might as well go along and see if there were envelopes she could stuff or ribbons to tie. It was better than sitting around the house doing nothing.

That evening when she returned to her room, she looked at the book Tom had left for her.

"It was a great adventure wasn't it, my love? Now you're on an entirely new one. It will be a long while before I can join you." She said into the room. She reached for the envelope and broke the seal. She sat and looked at it for a long while before she pulled the sheet of paper from inside.

_My Darling Sybil_

_I have loved you everyday since the one when I first set eyes on you. I have thanked my lucky stars everyday of my life since we were wed. We talked so often of our dreams and of where we would like to go. You and the children were my dream. The where didn't matter. _

_Love is such a precious gift. Cease it where you can and hold on to it. Rory loves you. Not as a mother or sister, but as a man loves a woman. I've known since his last visit to London. If you find yourself returning his feelings don't let anything stand in your way. He's a good man and will treat you as you deserve. Society almost tore us apart when we were young. Let your heart guide you as it did then and be happy, my love._

_Words cannot express the depth of my feelings for you. I will love you throughout eternity. God willing we will meet again in whatever awaits us on the other side._

_Yours now and forever,_

_Tom _

"Oh, Tom you silly romantic fool," Sybil said with tears streaming down her cheeks. She curled into a ball as the sobs tore through her and cried herself into an exhausted sleep.

A few mornings later the sun seemed to shine a little brighter for Sybil as accompanied her mother again to the village hall to help out with the decorating. Mr. Wetherby an older man from one of the local farms pulled up in front with a load of greenery to be used as hall decorations. Sybil went outside with a group of other women to help bring the branches in and begin weaving them into garlands.

"Lady Sybil," Mr. Wetherby said tipping his hat. "I've been hoping to run into you. The local by-elections are coming up for the Town Council. A group of us have been looking for candidates to fill the vacant seats. Everyone still talks about how you put the Agricultural Authority on their ear. They've been a lot quieter since you gave them what for. Have you given any thought to getting involved in the local scene?"

"How very kind of you to think of me," Sybil replied. "I'm afraid with the events of the last year, I haven't given it any thought. I have no political aspirations of my own. I was just defending my family's property."

"Perhaps you could give it some thought. We are having an organizational meeting in a few days to discuss potential candidates. Might you be able to attend?"

"I'll certainly give it some thought," Sybil replied.

Before he left Mr. Wetherby gave Sybil the place and time for the meeting.

"I saw you speaking to Mr. Wetherby," Lady Cora mentioned while they were walking home. "What did he have to say?"

"He wanted to talk to me about running for Alderwoman," Sybil said slowly.

"Are you considering it?"

"Perhaps. It was always Tom who wanted to be actively involved in politics. I was interested in the issues and involved when I was younger, but in truth I was just window dressing for his career. My real interest lies in nursing."

"Whatever you decide dear, the family will support you. You will do well, no matter what direction you decide on."

"Thank you, Mama."

Sybil attended the organizational meeting later that week and listened politely to what the group had to say. Politics had played such a large part of her life in the twenty-three years of her marriage they now seemed to lack the luster they once had. She left the meeting promising to think over what the group had said but not convinced it was the right decision for her. She returned home feeling somewhat more lost than when she had headed out the door.

Sybil found her mind turning yet again to Rory's impending visit. 'Why in the world would Tom get it in his head there was anything beyond friendship between her and Rory?' she thought. She and Rory had always been close in a way that was stronger than friendship. Sybil remembered when he was young. He had cried against Tom's chest and fretted over the decisions he needed to make. He had needed both of their guidance so desperately. When Sybil closed her eyes she could still see him imitating every action when he was in her father's presence. He wasn't that lost young boy any longer. He hadn't been for a very long time.

The last time she had seen him, Sybil had asked him if he had met anyone new yet. He had smiled slowly in his own way and replied that he hadn't met anyone to hold a candle to his favorite girl. She had thought he was talking about his late wife Colleen, now she wasn't so sure. He had loved Colleen deeply, of that she was certain. "Drat you Tom," she said when she stopped by the graveyard on the way home. "Why did you have to put these thoughts in my head?"

As she turned to leave the graveyard and walked towards the road, she could have sworn she heard someone whisper, "Forever."


	20. A Door Opens

A Door Opens

In the end Sybil decided not to put her name forward as a candidate for the local elections. Instead she volunteered for canvasing and became more involved in the Board of Directors at the hospital. She needed to get out and meet new people and focus her attention away from herself. It was enough to keep her out two to three nights a week. Her mother still worried but was happy to see Sybil starting the first steps to recovering from her grief.

"Sybil is worrying about Rory's visit," Lady Cora told Mary and Matthew one evening when she was at the Abbey for dinner. Sybil had gone to one of her committee meetings.

"What makes you say that?" Mary asked.

"She gets an odd look on her face every time his name is mentioned and changes the subject."

"I wouldn't worry about it too much," Matthew commented. "She has known him for a long time. He lived with them for a time. Most likely there are some personal details about Tom's estate she wants to discuss with him."

"I hope you're right," Lady Cora replied. "She almost made herself sick before. I hate to see her like this."

"Sybil is better than she was Mama," Mary said. "Her grief needs to run its course."

"I can't help but worry. It's a mother's prerogative."

"And a child's," Mary said. "Stop worrying or you will be the one taking ill."

In the third week of March 1942 Rory was expected on a late train. Arrangements had been made for Edith and Sir Anthony to meet him with the car. Sybil was on the late afternoon shift at the hospital and would not have enough time to get home, changed and go to the station in time to meet the train. She had rearranged her shifts so she had the next four days off for his visit.

When she arrived home, she could hear voices coming from the drawing room. She hung up her coat and went through to see who was there. When she saw who was there she stopped in her tracks, her polite inquiry frozen on her lips. Rory rose to greet her. His blonde hair was slightly darker than the last time she had seen him. The lines around his eyes and mouth were deeper. She was hit by his height. It had never occurred before that he was the same height as Matthew. He hadn't put on an ounce since he was twenty-five. Other than the obvious signs of age he looked much the same as he had at his graduation from medical school.

"Sybil, how have you been?" he said with a smile. "The ferry arrived ahead of schedule so I caught an earlier train."

"Rory," she managed to choke out before she dashed across the room and into his arms. "Rory." Sybil was sobbing wildly into his chest. His arms went around her to hold her and he rested his cheek on the top of her head. Neither of them noticed Lady Cora leave the room and quietly close the door behind her.

He held and rocked her in his arms while her grief poured out. Sybil knotted his shirt into her hands and clung to him while he stroked her hair.

"There, there my dear one, don't cry," he crooned. "You're not alone. I'm here now. All will be right."

"It feels like nothing will ever be right again," she sobbed into his chest.

"It will. He's resting with the angels now. He wouldn't want you to be like this."

"I don't understand why. Why did he have to go?"

"Why do any of them have to go?" Rory said softly. "It's not for us to question. Colleen was still a girl. I don't know why. He loved you. Take heart in it."

"Oh Rory, what am I going to do?" Sybil sighed against him as her sobs started to subside.

"You're going to dry your eyes and talk to me," he said gently. He pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and wiped the tears from her face then handed it to her to blow her nose while he kept one arm around her. They moved to sit on the settee with Rory holding her hands.

"I've been so lost," Sybil told him.

"Of course you have. No one says the vows on their wedding day thinking till death us do part will come sooner than later."

"How do I go on? How did you ever do it?" Sybil asked looking at their hands.

"You just do and then one day you wake up and the pain is gone. All that is left is the love. Tom loved you so very much."

"He loved you too."

"It's different for us. We loved him by choice not because he was family. We made the choice to include him in our lives. Now that he is gone we have to pick up the pieces and move on."

"How did you get so old and wise, all of a sudden?" Sybil said leaning her forehead against his.

"I had a good teacher," Rory said with a sad smile.

The next day they headed into the village. Sybil wanted to show Rory around the hospital. He was now the chief surgeon for two hospitals in his local area. Surgeons were in short supply in Ireland with the war on. It was hard to keep them in a rural hospital like Listowel when they could make a vast amount more working in a city or across the sea in England. He had been attending a conference to keep abreast of the changes in medicine as a result of the war. New surgical techniques were being published so fast, he was having a hard time keeping up with them.

"Major Beasley I'd like to introduce you to a relative of my late husband's from Ireland. This is Dr. Lester," Sybil said.

"How do you do?" Major Beasley said. "May I inquire what type of practice you are in?"

"Chief Surgeon at Tralee General Hospital and Listowel Community. I was in Dublin for a surgical conference and decided to come over for a visit for a few days."

"A surgeon? This is fortuitous. I have been going over some of the latest journals and have a number of questions. Perhaps they were covered at your conference. Nurse Branson, would you mind if I drag Dr. Lester off to talk shop for a bit?"

"I don't feel I should leave Sybil to her own devices. I'm only here for a few days," Rory said. "She was just showing me about. I'm always interested in how other hospitals are set up. You never know where you will find ideas for improvement in your own set up."

"Don't worry about me, Rory. I'll go speak to Cousin Isobel for a bit. I don't mind."

"If you're sure then," Rory said looking directly at Sybil and waiting for her nod. "I'd be happy to discuss the conference with you, Major Beasley. You may have some information I've been looking for as well."

Sybil went to find Cousin Isobel while Rory was off talking to Major Beasley.

"Sybil, you're looking much better today than you have in some time," Isobel commented.

"I'm feeling better," Sybil replied. "Rory's presence has a calming effect on me."

"He certainly has always been a big part of your life," Isobel replied giving Sybil an appraising look. "It's too bad he lives so far away."

"I wish he was closer. I would like to see him more often."

"Sybil, forgive me for saying so and please don't take this the wrong way," Isobel paused slightly. "You're still a young woman. Take what life has to offer and run with it. I didn't when Matthew's father died. By the time I realized what was right in front of me, I was an old woman and it was too late. It is one of my biggest regrets."

"Thank you for telling me," Sybil replied covering Isobel's hand with hers. "Right now I don't know what I want. Everything is still too fresh."

"Just don't wait too long," Isobel said with a small smile of regret.

"I won't."

After the hospital Sybil and Rory wandered around the village then headed for the graveyard. Sybil let Rory go to the grave on his own to say his goodbyes in private. His eyes were red with unshed tears and his jaw was set from the effort of holding them back when he rejoined her.

"It isn't right. He should be buried in Ireland," Rory said.

"We couldn't get the permits. Riordan tried but with the war on there are restrictions on transporting the deceased. We'll try again when the war is over."

Rory only nodded. Sybil took his arm as they started to walk back towards the Dower House.

"Rory, can I ask you something?" Sybil questioned.

"What is it?"

Sybil stopped walking and turned towards him.

"Do you love me?"

"What kind of a question is that? Of course I love you. You and Tom were the only family I had for years."

"I'm not talking about that. It was something Tom mentioned."

Rory looked up at the clouds blowing overhead in the sky, before he looked back at Sybil.

"I always thought the man was touched by the fairies. He had a way of figuring out exactly what I was thinking no matter how much I tried to hide it."

"You were too much alike."

"We weren't that much alike."

"You haven't answered my question."

Rory sighed.

"Why do you want to know?" he asked evading her question.

"I just do," Sybil said her brow taking on a frown.

Rory thought it over for a minute. They began walking again.

"Yes," he said finally. "I wasn't going to tell you. At least not like this."

"When did you realize things had changed?"

"About six years ago. After Colleen died I had offers. You know," he said flushing slightly. "They either didn't appeal or didn't work out or both. Besides I had a young child to think about. Then I came to London for a visit and I just knew. I tried to ignore it. There I was in love with the wife of my best friend. The man who was practically my father."

"I'm glad I didn't know. It would have made things strange."

"And now?" he said stopping and looking into her face.

"I'm not sure. I'm going to have to think about it."

"Just don't think too long."

"I won't," Sybil replied.


	21. Beginner's Luck

Beginner's Luck

"Let's go fishing," Rory said to Sybil the next morning at breakfast.

"Rory, it's March. It's too cold to go fishing," Sybil replied.

"No it's not. We'll take a pack with some blankets and a flask of coffee. You can wrap up and stay warm. Have you ever caught a fish before?"

"No, I never wanted to put the worm on the hook."

"We'll use some left over bits of ham for bait. Then you won't have to worry about the poor worm. Come on. It will be fun. I'm sure your father's old rods are out in the shed. I thought I saw them yesterday."

"Alright, you asked for it," Sybil said with a smile. "I'll have you know I'll be a terrible fisherman. I have no patience."

"You just haven't used the right bait before."

"I've never used any bait. I didn't have to. Someone else always caught the fish for me."

"This time you can catch it and clean it yourself."

"Eew."

"I'll make you a wager. Whoever catches the most fish, doesn't have to clean them."

"You're on," said Sybil with a laugh before she went to change into heavier clothes.

It was the happiest Sybil had felt in months. They walked across the countryside to a stream that was shaded by a stand of oaks. Rory showed her how to tie a hook on her line and gave her a choice of ham or worms to put on the hook.

"Fish are too intelligent to eat worms," Sybil informed him with her nose in the air and huge smile on her face. She took a tiny piece of ham, placed it on the hook and dipped her hook in the stream.

"Not like that. You have to cast it."

"If I was a fish, I would stay here in the shade near the side," Sybil said laughing happily. "You can waste your time fiddling with the rod and line all you like. I'm going to sit here in a blanket and keep warm."

"We'll see who winds up cleaning the fish," Rory shot back with a smile.

It wasn't too long and Sybil's line started to bob.

"Oh, what do I do?" she called in excitement, her eyes going round. She hadn't actually thought she would catch anything.

"Reel it in," Rory said coming over to guide her actions, then scooping the fish into a net when it got close enough.

"Now who's going to be cleaning fish for supper?" Sybil said with a huge smile. She couldn't resist teasing him.

"Beginner's luck. We'll see who has the most at the end of the day."

Sybil got a cup of coffee from the flask before she baited her hook again. She went over and offered Rory a drink from her cup before she went back and put her line in the water again. It wasn't long and Sybil got another bite.

"I got another one," she called excitedly. She fumbled with the reel until she managed to get the fish up onto the bank. Rory grabbed it and put it in the creel.

He retrieved the cup Sybil had been using for her coffee and poured himself a drink. He set the cup down by the rucksack before he looked at her with a devilish gleam in his eye.

"I need a kiss for luck," he said before he dropped a kiss on her forehead.

"No, you don't," Sybil said laughing while pushing him back with one hand on his shoulder. "I need all the luck for myself. You're going to be cleaning fish tonight."

He stood up laughing and cast his line again.

"Are you going to keep all the luck for yourself?" he asked with a grin.

"Yes," Sybil replied. "I need to win the bet."

"Never," he replied laughing.

They had been fishing for twenty minutes or so in silence with neither of them catching anything.

"Do you remember the picnic, just after Riordan was born when your father taught me how to fish?" Rory asked her.

"I remember that you fell in," Sybil said with a smile.

"I never."

"Yes, you did. You got so excited when you caught your first fish. You were holding it in the air and standing in the middle of the stream. You lost your footing and fell over backwards."

"It was a big fish. It gave a jerk and knocked me in."

"It was a little minnow."

"I think you're loosing your memory in your old age."

"I'm only three and a half years older than you. I think it's you who is loosing their memory, Dr. Lester."

Sybil had set aside her rod and come over to stand beside him.

"You couldn't stop yourself from falling in then and you can't now," she said as she gave him a push.

"Hey," Rory called as he stumbled sideways. He caught himself just before he fell in the stream. Sybil had run behind a large oak laughing.

"I'll get you for that," he called.

"You have to catch me first," Sybil called back.

Rory started chasing her through the trees. The two of them were laughing like children in their game of one up man ship. Every time Rory almost caught her Sybil would dash off between another pair of trees.

"You're getting old and slow," Sybil taunted him.

"When I catch you I'll show you how slow I am," he taunted back.

Sybil was peeking around the trunk of a large oak when Rory sneaked up behind her and caught her. He started tickling her like mad, making her squirm before he grabbed her and threw her over his shoulder. He started walking towards the stream.

"Rory, put me down," Sybil shrieked kicking her feet.

"Nope."

He stopped by the side of the stream and made as if he was going to drop her in.

"Don't you dare!" Sybil squealed grabbing his belt and holding on for dear life.

"I'll reconsider on one condition," he said bouncing her up and down on his shoulder.

"What?" Sybil said kicking her feet and trying to get loose.

He spun around and took a step away from the water.

"You clean the fish."

"Never," Sybil said with a laugh.

"Then I'll get my revenge another way," he said sliding her to the ground and trapping her against a tree and tickling her.

"Eeee," Sybil squealed laughing and ducking under his arm to take off through the trees again.

"Come back here," Rory called running after her laughing. By the time he caught her they were both out of breath. Sybil was panting from the exertion and still smiling from their silly game. Rory took a small step closer to her where she was leaning back against a tree. The smile suddenly faded from his face as his gaze went to her mouth. His hand moved to cup the side of her face as his lips met hers.

Sybil didn't know whether to kiss him back or push him away. She had only kissed one man in her life before. She had no idea what to expect. As his lips touched hers she forgot to question the right or wrong of the situation as she lost herself in the sensation of their first kiss.

His lips were hesitant against hers as though he was waiting for her to push him away. When she didn't rebuff him he slid his arms around her and kissed her with a little more force but still softly enough she could break free at any point. Sybil had never experienced anything like it. Tom had always taken the lead and let her know in no uncertain terms he desired her.

When the kiss ended Rory pulled back slightly and blushed. Sybil was blushing furiously and looking anywhere but him. He was so tongue-tied he didn't know what to say. He hadn't intended to actually kiss her. He had only been teasing.

"Let's go catch some more fish," she finally said.

"I'm going to win the bet," he said with a smile. "You're just having beginner's luck."

"If I didn't know better I would say you're the beginner," Sybil said.

Sybil tried casting her line a few times to no avail. Rory changed his bait, cast his line a few times and had another fish in a few minutes.

"You see, I told you I needed a kiss for luck," he said with an embarrassed flush.

"You're so full of yourself," Sybil teased him. "If you're such a great fisherman how come I won the bet?"

"You won because I don't want you getting your hands smelling like fish," Rory said while he rinsed the gutted fish in the stream.

They walked back to the house reminiscing about the times Sybil and Tom had visited Rory in Ireland and the fishing trips they had taken the boys on.

"Do you still have so many animals?" Sybil asked him.

"Not so many as I used to," Rory replied. "I haven't had a milk cow in years. It was really for Colleen. She was never comfortable around the other doctors or any of my well to do friends when they stopped by when they were in the area for vacations. She was happy when she was working with the animals or growing things."

"No marriage is ever totally perfect, is it?" Sybil said thoughtfully.

"No, I don't think that exists."

"I was very happy with Tom but he always worked too much," Sybil said sadly. "It stopped us from doing things we wanted. He was always trying to prove to my family that he was good enough for me. Sometimes I think he was trying to prove it to himself."

Rory moved closer to her and put his arm around her pulling her closer for a hug. He didn't take his arm away.

"He wouldn't have been happy any other way. He loved what he did."

Sybil nodded and slipped her arm around his waist.

"I'm glad you fell into my mother-in-law's garden all those years ago."

"I'm grateful you picked me up and put me back together, in more ways than one. I don't know if I've ever told you that."

"You have. It's in everything you do. Every time I see you I still know it was the right thing to do."

They walked on in silence until they were almost back to the house.

"It's been a good day hasn't it, Sybil?"

"It has," she replied.


	22. Memories

Memories

"You two look happy," Lady Cora commented when Sybil and Rory returned. "Did you have a good time?"

"I had a lovely time," Sybil replied. "We were just talking about the fishing trips Tom and Rory used to take the boys on."

"We caught three fish," Rory said. "I'll do the honors for dinner tonight. I'll make poached trout. My housekeeper always fries them. I get a little tired of it."

"How is Mrs. Shay?" Lady Cora inquired. I believe I met her at your wedding.

"She's fine. She is not as gossipy as she used to be. When her husband died she didn't want to burden her son, so I invited her to keep house for me. She keeps a sharp eye on Kathy."

"I've always liked Mrs. Shay," Sybil commented.

"How is your daughter keeping? You haven't mentioned her," Lady Cora inquired.

"Fine. She is the image of her mother. The boys keep following her about but she doesn't seem to notice."

"Mary noticed right away," Lady Cora commented. "Edith was hopeless and Sybil never seemed to notice at all."

"It was different, Mama. I had a governess. I wasn't out in society until I was sixteen. I noticed one boy right away. After that I didn't care about the rest."

"Tom?" Rory questioned.

Sybil nodded.

"We wasted a lot of years worrying about what other people would think. I would never do that again," she said.

"It's a good thing your father didn't know. He would have sent him away," Lady Cora replied. "What are your plans for the afternoon?"

"I was thinking of going over and visiting my in-laws," Rory replied. "Would you like to come Sybil?"

"No, you go. I'll stay here. I have some things around the house to catch up."

In truth Sybil wanted some time to think over the events of the morning. She was feeling confused about her feelings concerning Rory's unexpected kiss. She pushed the washing machine into the middle of the floor in the porch and set about collecting the laundry from around the house. They had a housekeeper two days a week, but the house was large enough her mother and her still needed to do a great deal of the chores themselves. Sybil turned the handle to the room Rory was staying in and stopped in her tracks when she entered.

"He hasn't changed one bit," she said with a laugh while she collected his shirts.

The room looked like his case had exploded and shot cloths everywhere. The bedclothes were pulled up hastily in lumpy disarray. She straightened the bed before she left with the pile of shirts. When Rory had lived with them in London, Tom had been constantly telling him to clean his room. Sybil paused for a second as she headed back to the porch. Today was the first day she had thought about Tom and their life together that her heart didn't feel like it was being ripped from her chest. She got the load of whites loaded into the barrel of the wringer washer, that she had filled with hot water, soap and bluing and switched it on. One nice thing about having money at her disposal was that she had been able to afford a motorized machine instead of having to hand crank the laundry as she had done when the children were little.

What was she going to do about Rory, Sybil wondered. She had felt something when he kissed her. She knew she loved Rory, but was she falling in love with him? She had always loved him as part of the family, her wounded bird. Now she wasn't sure. His presence gave her comfort in a way no else's had. He was a joy to spend time with. There was nothing they couldn't discuss. She trusted him implicitly. Was there something to build a relationship on? She didn't even know if he wanted a relationship with her or she with him. She had always been so cautious and thought over every decision. It had almost cost her her life with Tom. She was sick of being cautious. She decided to let things take their course and see where they might lead.

The next day it was raining. Letters arrived from Riordan and Jay. Sybil read them aloud at breakfast.

"I'm going to be a grandma," she gasped when she read Riordan's letter. She put the letter on the table with a shocked expression. "What am I going to do? I don't know how to knit."

Rory began laughing till the tears rolled down his face. Lady Cora was snickering behind her napkin.

"It isn't that funny," Sybil said punching Rory in the shoulder. "I never learned. Tom's mother did all that."

"I'm sure Janine will take care of it," Lady Cora commented.

"I'll have to remind him about the postman when I write next time," Rory said.

"That was terribly funny," Sybil replied. She told her mother about Riordan's early belief of where babies come from.

"Read us Jay's letter," Lady Cora said after they had stopped laughing.

Jay had finally gotten up the nerve to propose to the girl he liked. Her family was having serious reservations about his Irish Catholic heritage.

"I'd like to go up there and give them a piece of my mind," Sybil said with a frown. "Can't they see what a good person he is?"

"If they love each other enough, they'll work it out," Rory commented. "He's a big boy. He can stand on his own two feet."

"What are your plans today?" Lady Cora asked.

"We haven't got any. I was thinking we'd stay in and go through the old photo albums."

"You just want to torture me with pictures of how awkward I used to be," Rory teased her.

"Who said anything about used to be?" Sybil teased back.

"Well, I must go. I have committee meetings all day. I won't be back until late. Don't wait dinner for me," Lady Cora said.

"Have a nice day, Mama," Sybil said before she left.

They got the breakfast dishes cleaned up and built a fire in the drawing room grate to dispel the chill before they curled up on the settee with the albums. They laughed over some of the pictures and caught up on news about people they both new.

"I'm glad you're here," Sybil told him as they closed one of the albums. "I haven't been this relaxed in a long time."

"It's my boyish charm," Rory teased her. "It makes all the old ladies love me."

"Maybe they just love you because you're old," Sybil jibbed him back.

"I'm not that old," he replied quietly. "Neither are you."

Sybil sighed. The more time she spent with him the more her feelings towards him were changing. Was it because Tom had told her to accept Rory in his letter as something more or was what she was feeling real? It had only been six months and only a few days since the pain of her loss had started to fade. Sybil looked at her hands then back at Rory.

"Rory, did Tom ask you to take care of me?"

"No. What makes you ask that?"

"He left you a letter. He left one for me as well."

"He didn't mention you in the letter. He talked about the things we felt and never put a voice to. I think you should read it."

"Rory, I shouldn't. It was meant for you."

"Sybil I want you to read it. I have it with me."

Rory went to his room and returned with the envelope Tom had left for him.

"I'll read it now then, if you insist," she said.

She sat on a chair by the window and took the folded sheet from the envelope.

_Rory_

_I've told you many times how proud I am of everything you have achieved. I am so proud of the man you've become. You took everything I tried to tell you and put it into practice. I couldn't love you more if you were my flesh and blood son. You are the son of my heart if not my body._

_I can't tell you how grateful I am for the care you took of my mother in her last years. It was a comfort to me to know she was cared for until her last breath by someone who cared for her as much as I did._

_Don't spend your life waiting for life to come to you. Go out and have an adventure or two. Find someone you love and loves you in return and hold onto them. I wasted four years of my life not speaking up because society dictated it was wrong. I can never get them back. Don't leave things until you are an old man and it is too late_

_I'll be waiting for you on the other side. We'll go catch a fish or two and tell a few yarns. Goodbye my son._

_Your loving father,_

_Tom_

Sybil quietly folded the paper and put it back in the envelope. Rory went to stand beside her and rubbed her shoulders.

"He said much the same thing to me. He didn't want me to waste my life in grief," she said.

"He was a good man, Sybil, the best. No one will ever replace him in your heart."

Sybil placed her hand on his and thought for a moment. She stood and slid her arms around his waist and laid her head on his shoulder.

Rory held her lost in his own thoughts for a few minutes.

"Sybil. I'm sorry I kissed you yesterday. I got carried away. It was presumptuous of me."

"Don't be sorry. My feelings concerning you are mixed up right now. I'm not sure what I feel."

"Take some time and think about it. Just don't take three years. I'm not that young anymore."

"You're one of the most patient people I know."

"Not really."

"You put up with that ridiculous horse of yours. Anyone else would have sent him to the glue factory," Sybil laughed slightly as she pulled back and retook her seat.

"He got loose a few weeks back and headed into town straight to the bakeshop. They called me from the hospital. He was running all over town terrorizing the shops and eating everything in sight. He cost me a pretty penny, but I just can't bring myself to part with him."

Sybil laughed at the picture he painted.

"How do you feel about going for a walk in the rain?" she asked.

"We'll get all wet."

"We'll take an umbrella. I think I'd like to take a look at the world while it's being washed clean," she replied.

"And here I always thought it was Tom who had flights of fancy. You're just as bad."

"Everyone needs a little whimsy in their lives. Mine has been lost this last while. I've missed it."

"Alright," he groaned. "We'll go out in the rain, just don't complain when you get wet feet."

"I won't complain."

"I bet you will."

"What do you want to bet?" Sybil asked.

"Whoever complains first has to do the washing up tonight."

"You're on. You are going to loose again."

"Never," he said with a twinkle in his eye.

The last day of Rory's visit Sybil walked him to the train. She hated to see him go. She hadn't felt this alive in months. In his presence the loneliness was gone. It was being replaced by something new that she wasn't ready to put a label on.

"Any plans for the summer?" Rory asked her as they neared the station.

"I was thinking of going to visit each of the boys for a few days," she replied.

"It might do you good to get away."

"I've been thinking the same thing. It's been like a breath of fresh air having you here. I wish you didn't have to go."

"I have to get back. You could come to Ireland for a visit if you like," Rory said. "When you're ready."

"You could always come back. Just don't leave it five years next time."

"I won't," he said. They were standing by the train. He had to board soon or miss the train entirely.

He hugged her tight. She was holding him tight not wanting to let him go.

"Goodbye Sybil. I really have to go," he said before he placed a quick kiss on her lips.

"Goodbye Rory," she said. "Don't be a stranger."

She stood on the platform and waved as the train pulled out. Life had just gotten a whole lot more confusing.


	23. Getting Advice

Getting Advice

Sybil was feeling restless when she returned to work. Her life at Downton was feeling more monotonous by the day. The wounded came and left much as they had done in the previous war. She still enjoyed her work but it felt like something was lacking in her life. She still missed Tom terribly. She caught herself more than once thinking of Rory's visit or smiling over some silly joke he had made.

A few months after Rory's visit she took the train to Scotland to visit Jay. She was putting off returning to the London home she had shared with Tom for as long as possible. Jay was glad to see her looking so much better.

"You're looking better Mum," he said.

"I've been doing much better since Rory's visit. He was like a breath of fresh air," she replied.

"He's always such a character. I never know whether he's teasing or he's serious."

"He's usually being serious. He hides it behind the humor."

"You know him well. I've never really understood your relationship. The three of you were always so close."

"What would you say if I told you I think my feeling towards him are changing?" Sybil said.

"For better or worse?"

"It would depend on how you look at it, I suppose," his mother replied quietly. "When your father was alive I always thought of him as someone we adopted into the family. Since I saw him again, I think there might be something more."

"At least you know what you would be getting into," Jay said despondently. "Just make sure you consider your options carefully."

"What's the matter, Jay?" Sybil asked her son. She could tell something was bothering him.

"June and I have called things off. Her family just couldn't get around the differences in our religion and backgrounds."

"Did she feel the same way as her family?" Sybil asked.

Jay nodded.

"At first I didn't want to believe she did, but it became obvious," he said with a sigh.

"You're so very like your father. He was idealistic to a fault. He always wanted to believe the best about people until he was proven wrong. He wore his heart on his sleeve just like you. In time you will find someone who deserves you."

"It doesn't feel that way right now, but I know you're right."

"How much longer do you have in Scotland?"

"This project should be wrapping up in a few months. Then it will be back to Cambridge."

"Life has a funny way of closing one door and opening another," Sybil said.

"It does at that," Jay said truly smiling for the first time since his mother had arrived.

The trip to London to visit Riordan was a hard one for Sybil. Every room in the house held so many memories. "They are happy memories," Sybil tried to tell herself but it didn't stop the tears from coming to her eyes at the sight of the desk where Tom had worked or walking into the bedroom they had shared. Riordan was happy to see her looking so much better as well. He regarded her thoughtfully when the topic of Rory's visit came up.

"You two have always been as thick as thieves," he said. "What did the two of you get up to?"

"Not much. We talked and went fishing. We made silly bets to see who could get the best of each other. I felt young again and free."

"You're not that old, Mum."

"Everyone keeps telling me that."

"You sound like you're in love."

"Riordan! How could you say such a thing?"

"Because it's true. Da was a good man, but you need to move on. It will be a year next month. Rory would be a good choice."

"You sound like your father," Sybil said toying with the hem of her dress then folding her hands in her lap. "Do you have any names picked out for the baby?"

"Evan for a boy, Clarissa for a girl and don't try to change the subject. Did Da say something to you before he died?"

"He said a lot of things. He wanted me to move on with my life."

"What else?"

"Are you cross examining me counselor?"

"Maybe I am. You're obviously not saying something."

"He told me that if I found myself having feelings for Rory I should accept him," Sybil said slowly.

"And are you?"

"I'm not sure. Something's changed, but I'm not sure what."

"Just don't leave things too long, Mum. Life's too short. Over half the lads from my class at Oxford are dead already. It makes you think. I don't see the point in waiting around. Just get on with it."

"You're a good son, Riordan," Sybil said squeezing his arm. "A little too serious most of the time. Try to follow some of your own advice and have some fun."

"Did I tell you I got a letter from Rory the other day? He told me to have sufficient funds on hand when the postman comes. He said he was pretty sure babies arrived C. O. D." Riordan laughed and shook his head. "He is never going to let me live that down."

"That was such a good visit. It was one of the happiest times of my life."

"There will be more happy times Mum," Riordan told her. "Just let them happen."

Sybil left the house in London with a feeling of contentment. The house was full of people once again and full of life. Janine had made a few changes but the house was essentially the same as ever. The roses planted by her grandmother would soon be flowering for a fifth generation in the house. Life did move on and she could feel hers starting to move on as well.

Merilee had come to visit over the summer but Sybil hadn't broached the topic of the decisions she was considering with her. She had always been the most difficult of the three children. She had an impetuous nature that caused her to speak without thinking. More than once her father had to put his foot down when she had taken a notion to go off on a tangent. In some ways Sybil envied her daughter's ability to follow her heart on a moments notice. Sybil's early life with all its restrictions had made her cautious. Almost too cautious and she still felt the its constraints even though that old life was long since gone.

When she returned from London she sat down and wrote Rory a letter inviting him for a return visit. She would put the ball in his court. If he truly had feelings for her as he claimed he would accept the invitation. She needed to see him again and find out if what she was feeling was real or a figment of her imagination colored by her grief. Once she had sealed the letter she drew the framed picture of her and Tom from its hiding place in her top drawer and set it on the dresser. For the first time it felt right to have it in the room. Rory had been right. The pain did fade and all that was left was the love.

"Aunty Sybil!" Kathy called to her as Rory and his daughter stepped down from the train a week before Christmas 1942. Rory had accepted Sybil's invitation and decided to bring Kathy to Downton so she could spend the holidays with her grandparents. Colleen's brother now ran the farm with his parents staying on to help out.

"Hello Kathy, I'm so glad you could come," Sybil said hugging her close. She was the picture of her mother and full of stories about the trip.

"We saw three American truck convoys from the train," Kathy told her. She was bursting with excitement. "There were some soldiers from America on the train, too. They sounded so funny."

"You don't think we sounded funny to them?" her father asked her.

"Maybe," Kathy said wrinkling her nose. "Granny is going to show me how to make cheese like my mother used to do. Da let me pick out the presents. I got everyone honey."

Too late Kathy realized she had blurted out the secret and her hand went to her mouth.

"I'm sure everyone will love it," Sybil said. "It's very hard for us to get sweets. I hope you won't be disappointed with your Christmas here."

Sybil had borrowed the car from Mary and Matthew to pick them up. It was cold and snowy. The walk from the station was rather uncomfortable at this time of year. She had been avoiding looking directly at Rory. Other than the quick peck on the cheek they had exchanged when he first arrived, she hadn't looked at him.

"Do you mind if we stop by the Drake's first?" Rory asked her. "Kathy wants to see her grandparents right away."

"That's fine," Sybil replied heading in the direction of the Drake farm.

Kathy was so excited to see her grandparents and they were so taken with her, they all decided Kathy would stay with them rather than at the Dower House. The Drakes didn't get many opportunities to spend time with her and they didn't want to waste a minute.

"How have you been?" Rory asked Sybil once they were back in the car and headed to the Dower House.

"I've been well. I went to see both of the boys over the summer. Jay is back in Cambridge now. His girlfriend didn't work out."

"I'm sorry to hear that."

"Don't be. She couldn't accept his Irish heritage. It's better that he move on and find someone who can."

"You've always been accepting of people regardless of what they've done or where they come from. It's not everyone who can be," he said quietly.

"Rory I've told you many times, your past is just that. Your past." They had stopped in front of the Dower House. Rory was getting his cases from the back. When he turned around Sybil looked directly into his eyes. She thought she saw his old fear of rejection there for a fleeting second before it was gone.

"I know that. I was just saying I hope Jay finds someone who can accept him for who he is," he said quietly. Just as quickly he grinned, then broke out into a smile. "I bet you I can make a bigger snow ball than you."

"What do you want to bet this time?" Sybil said laughing.

"I don't know, you decide," he said grinning widely.

"I know. Whoever wins gets to decide what the prize will be."

"You're on," he said. "No cheating this time."

"Who says I cheat," Sybil said mischievously.

"Anyone who's ever played a game with you."

"I don't cheat. I just get you to let me win."

"It's the same thing isn't it?" he quipped.

"You're too soft hearted," Sybil said laughing. They were in the entrance and hanging up their coats. "It's what makes you so loveable." Too late she realized she had voiced the thoughts in her head. The smile faded from her face and she looked away.

"I'm glad you think so," he said quietly. His face had gone dead serious. When he saw her discomfort his countenance changed back to one of teasing. "You're still too bossy."

"I wouldn't be if you didn't need it," her spirits lifted as they went back to their usual banter.

"Maybe I do. More than you know," he said so quietly she almost didn't hear him. "Now I'll get these cases stowed and you can tell me all about what you got up to after I left," he said in a normal voice.

Sybil looked at him and smiled. She was glad he was here. Her heart was doing flip-flops inside her chest. It wasn't the wild crazy feelings she had felt for Tom, but it felt nice to have someone who was here for her for a change.


	24. Decorating

Decorating

Sybil was enjoying herself in Rory's company. They had rolled giant snowballs in the lane in front of the house and gone for walks in the snow. When Sybil was working Rory headed over to his in-laws to spend time with his daughter and the other side of his family. She found herself laughing and smiling constantly. When she thought of the holidays past the memories brought her joy rather than the pain she had felt the previous year.

"I thought we would go and cut a tree for the house today," Sybil said over breakfast. "I have the day off and the children should start arriving tomorrow."

"You just wanted me here for a slave," Rory teased. "I remember when we lived in London. Tom was working and you had me decorating the house endlessly."

"I was pregnant with Merilee. Would you have had me standing on a ladder?" Sybil said smiling at the memory.

"I must get going," Lady Cora said. "My charity committee is delivering Christmas hampers today. I don't expect to be back until after tea."

"Have a nice day, Mama," Sybil said before she left.

They took a sled to haul the tree back and headed into the forest on the grounds of the Abbey. Sybil kept changing her mind as to which tree she wanted until Rory started getting annoyed.

"Enough! I'll sit here on the sled until you decide. You're driving me crazy," he griped.

By the time she picked one and he got it cut down and tied to the sled he was visibly irritated.

"You still have a temper," Sybil said.

"Not as bad as it used to be and I hide it well these days. I do my best to keep it under control," he replied. "I haven't had a really bad session where I had to get away from everyone and everything for about seven years."

His mood was starting to lighten as he got his emotions under control. They both grabbed the rope for the sled and started to drag it through the snow back to the house.

"Why did I pick such a large one," Sybil groaned as they finally neared the house.

They had lunch before they got the tree in the house. Sybil had Rory move the tree from side to side and turn it so many times he lost patience with her.

"That's it. You're driving me mad. It stays right there."

"It's perfect," Sybil decreed happily.

Her mood was infectious and he found himself smiling as she stuffed a box of decorations into his hands. Rory was watching her as she hung the decorations on the tree. He thought she looked like a young girl as she placed the bright glass balls. Sybil stopped what she was doing to see him standing there staring at her. The smile slowly faded from her face.

"You haven't chosen your prize from the other day," he said as he quickly resumed hanging decorations. "I should get the ladder."

"I have chosen. I was waiting for the right moment to claim it," Sybil said.

"What have you chosen? Not something too difficult I hope. I'm not as young as I used to be. I don't think my body could stand up to chopping wood all day anymore."

"Not chopping wood," Sybil replied. "I'll tell you after you bring the ladder in."

Rory returned with the ladder. Sybil had him put it in the front entrance to hang the mistletoe. Once the mistletoe was hung she turned to him.

"This is what I chose," she said.

"What? Me hanging mistletoe? That isn't much of a prize after making such a large snowball."

"No, that wasn't what I chose," she said. She glanced up at the mistletoe that was right over her head.

"Oh," he said when he finally caught her meaning. He flushed slightly. He stepped towards her, and kissed her. His one hand cupped her cheek while other his arm went around her to pull her close. This time there was none of the hesitation of the last time he had kissed her nine months previously. Sybil's arms went around him to draw him closer. She had almost forgotten what it felt like to be kissed by a man. She felt herself kissing him back.

The kiss finally ended. He stepped back and blushed slightly. She noted he was still as bashful as ever.

"Will that do?" he asked.

"Yes, that will do quite nicely," she replied with a small smile.

"What do you want to bet next?" he asked in an attempt to break the tension.

"I bet you can't put the star on the tree straight the first try," she said laughing when he cocked an eyebrow at her.

"What are we playing for this time?"

"I'll let you know when I win," Sybil replied with a smile.

"I'm going to win this time," he replied with a laugh.

They went back to decorating the tree with Rory standing on the ladder and Sybil handing him the decorations. When she finally handed him the star for the top of the tree, he reached over and place it on top perfectly straight.

"You were supposed to let me win," Sybil said.

"Not this time," he replied.

"But you always let me win."

"Not always. Just most of the time."

Sybil started putting the gifts under the tree. When Rory returned from putting the ladder away he was dusting the snow from his hair.

"So what do you want for a prize?" Sybil asked him as she finished placing the last gift under the tree.

"This," he said taking her hand and placing his lips against hers. Her arms slowly wound themselves around his neck as he pulled her closer. They smiled slightly at each other before their lips met for the second time. They finally broke the embrace when they became conscious of knocking at the front door. They went to open the front door together with Rory still holding her hand. Kathy was there with her Grandmother Eliza Drake.

"We came into the village to do some visiting," Kathy said as they came in.

"Happy Christmas, Mrs. Drake," Sybil said as they came into the entrance.

"Happy Christmas, Lady Sybil. I was hoping to leave Kathy with her father while I pay my calls. It's rather boring for a young person listening to older folk talk."

"Da why are you blushing?" Kathy asked her father.

"Oh, no reason," he said and blushed even more.

"Are you sure we aren't intruding?" Mrs. Drake asked looking between Sybil and Rory. Sybil was now starting to blush as well.

"We're just warm from putting up the tree," Sybil said quickly. "It's a trifle warm in here.

Mrs. Drake left with a promise to retrieve Kathy after teatime. Kathy was enchanted with the tree and was busy examining every decoration.

"The star at the top looks a little crooked," Kathy said.

"Does it? I hadn't noticed," Sybil said her cheeks pink.

"Did you really know my Da before he was a doctor, Aunty Sybil?"

"Yes, I did."

"What was he like?"

"It's hard to say," Sybil said. She didn't know how much Rory had told his daughter about his early life.

"He said he learned his manners from an Earl, but I didn't believe him."

"That's quite true," Sybil replied. "He used to watch my father and imitate his manners. I notice it when he straightens his tie, and holds his fork. His manners are exactly like my father's. Would you like to see some pictures?"

Sybil glanced at Rory to see he was looking relieved. They exchanged a quick smile before Sybil pulled out an old photo album. She kept Kathy amused with stories of her father while he was in medical school. There were a number of group pictures with Rory looking awkward and out of place at garden parties and shoots when he was younger.

"You didn't smile much then Da," Kathy said.

"I had a lot of things to learn," he replied quietly. "Uncle Tom had to teach me how."

"How can you need to learn how to smile?" Kathy asked him quizzically. "Everyone knows that. You say the oddest things."

Sybil and Rory exchanged a look over her head.

It wasn't long after tea when Mrs. Drake returned to collect Kathy. After they had left Rory closed the door and turned to Sybil.

"What did you see when you first met me?" he asked suddenly solemn.

"Do you really want to know?" Sybil said as they moved to take a seat in the drawing room.

He nodded.

"I saw a boy who was so full of fear, he didn't know where to turn. You drank in every touch, every gesture like you were starving. You couldn't get enough."

He rose and went to stand by the fireplace and stared into the flames.

"And what do you see now?" he asked her quietly.

"A very kind man who reminds me a great deal of my father and my husband."

"Sybil, is that why you want me here, because I remind you of Tom?"

"No." Sybil rose to stand beside him and laid a hand on his arm. "That's not why. I needed to now if what I was feeling was real or if I had imagined it. You are like him in many ways but you're very different in others."

"Have you decided if your feelings are real or imagined," his face was turned away from her. The muscles in his arm were tight where she had her hand.

"They're real enough," she said quietly.

He let out the breath he had been holding.

"Thank god," he muttered under his breath. He turned and pulled her into an embrace.

"Where do we go from here?" Sybil asked. Her face was in the crock of his neck as she held him.

"I have no idea," he replied. "We'll just take things as they come I guess."

"Rory."

"Yes."

"Don't wait too long before you ask me."

"I won't," he said with a slow smile before he kissed her.


	25. Daughters

Daughters

"What is going on with our mother and Rory?" Merilee demanded on Christmas Eve when she got her brother's alone in the kitchen. Riordan and Janine had arrived on a late train from London. Riordan had to be back for the afternoon of Boxing Day for a duty watch. Merilee had managed to get a pass for four days and would be leaving on Boxing Day as well. Jay had arrived earlier in the day and was off for a week.

"Why don't you ask her that," Jay replied. He knew his sister well enough not to get involved. He had advised his mother to think things over. If things with Rory were progressing, Jay had no issue with it as long as his mother was treated with respect and well taken care of.

"You two don't even seem to care," Merilee retorted. Her and Jay had always rubbed each other the wrong way. She had teased him mercilessly and played endless practical jokes on him when she was younger. At twenty-one he had about enough of her nonsense and couldn't see why she couldn't grow up and stop trying to interfere in everyone else's lives.

Merilee found Jay rather annoying as well. When they were young he had always been front and center for every new gadget in the house to the point where she couldn't get near it. He had usually managed to disassemble things and put them back together in a different way before she had even a chance to get near it. At one point he had made a listening device out of an old telephone and put it under her bed. She had caught him and his friends snickering over a conversation she and a friend were having about one of the boys. She had been mortified and hadn't spoken to him for weeks.

Riordan frowned at Merilee in his overly serious way.

"They're obviously interested in each other. He's a good choice. I have no issue with it," Riordan said. He had enough on his plate at the moment not to be worrying about his mother's personal life. Foreign Secretary Eden had announced the mass executions of Jews by the Nazis in parliament a week before. His office now had the task of preparing charges against any prisoners of war believed to be involved. It was a massive legal headache that was going to take years to straighten out.

"They're disrespecting our father's memory and flaunting it in our faces. How can you two sit there and not say anything?" Merilee complained.

"They're not flaunting anything," Jay said calmly. "If you weren't so narrow minded you might realize holding hands isn't a crime." He was busy pouring drinks to take back into the other room.

"Merilee, if you want to know something talk to her in private. If you can't be civil keep your mouth shut," Riordan said. "She's not disrespecting our father. She's getting on with things."

Merilee snapped her mouth shut and followed her brothers back into the other room. Rory's daughter was there as was Cousin Isobel, her Aunt Mary and Uncle Matthew with their son and daughter. Aunt Edith and her husband had gone to visit his sister for the week. There was a board game going on a table at one side of the room and the rest of the family were visiting and catching up on news.

Merilee retook her seat beside her fiancée, John Andrews. She had brought him with her to meet the family and get away from the air base where he was stationed. She kept glancing at her mother. The small smiles her mother and Rory were exchanging were more than enough to tell her something was going on. Her mother was acting like a girl of half her age and Merilee didn't approve one bit.

"How long are you staying Rory?" Merilee asked him.

"We have to leave on Boxing Day in the evening."

"Isn't it rather unusual for you to come and visit the family at Christmas. You've never come twice in one year before?"

"Your mother invited me and I decided to accept her invitation," he replied calmly. He had a feeling Merilee was up to no good. Tom had a blind spot when it came to his daughter. Rory had caught her more than once when she was young pulling tricks on her brothers. Tom had brushed it off but Rory hadn't been impressed.

"Don't you usually spend the holidays with family in Ireland?" Merilee asked. She wasn't about to let up.

"I don't have any family in Ireland other than Kathy," Rory replied.

Merilee arched an eyebrow at him.

"If you're our father's cousin how can you not have family in Ireland? We have scads of relations on our Da's side over there?" she asked.

Kathy had been listening to the conversation and was waiting for her father's answer. Sybil's smile had faded from her face as had Lady Cora's. Rory's face had gone as white as a sheet. He glanced at Sybil and held her gaze for a minute before he turned back to Merilee. None of Sybil's children knew about his back story and neither did his daughter. It was something he wasn't planning on telling her until she was old enough to understand.

"Why don't we have any relations in Ireland Da? I only remember Gran and she lived with us."

Rory opened his mouth to respond and nothing came out. He looked at his glass and back up. Mary and Matthew knew the truth as well as Lady Cora. He felt like a caged animal with nowhere left to turn.

"Kathy," Sybil began. Her voice was very quiet. "Your father is adopted."

"But…how can that be," Kathy said. She was almost in tears. "You're my aunty and I had a Gran."

The tears were starting to form in the corner of Rory's eyes. He couldn't look at Sybil's children. He didn't know how to answer his daughter. He got up quickly and headed out the back door.

Sybil went and took Kathy by the hand and took her into the kitchen.

"I hope you're proud of yourself," Riordan said to Merilee.

"I was just asking a simple question," Merilee defended. She had always known there was something odd about Rory's family connection. She didn't like the idea of her mother with another man and she was going to do everything in her power to put a stop to it.

"We all know you were trying to cause trouble," Jay said.

"That's enough," Lady Cora spoke up sharply. "The topic is no longer open for discussion."

Riordan got up and went to find Rory and their mother, Jay was right behind him. He shot his sister a parting glare.

Sybil was in the kitchen trying to console Kathy.

"We don't love you or your Da any less," Sybil said. "We love him more because we chose to love him. Uncle Tom was his Da because he wanted to be. We just told everyone he was Uncle Tom's cousin. Gran loved you and your Da too."

"Why didn't Da tell me?"

"It's hard for him to talk about. He'll be back in a minute."

"Am I adopted too?"

"No of course not," Sybil said brushing the hair back from Kathy's face. "I remember when your mother was pregnant with you. She was so excited. You can ask Riordan and Jay they remember too."

Jay knelt down beside his mother and Kathy. Riordan had gone outside to look for Rory.

"I remember just after you were born," he said. "Your mom had blonde hair and blue eyes like you. Your Da took us fishing and we drank fresh milk every day when we came to your house."

Kathy was still looking sad but her tears had stopped.

"I remember when I was really little and your Da lived with us in London," Jay continued. "He took care of me when I had chicken pox. He would carry me down the street piggyback in the summers. I thought he was the best big cousin in the world. I didn't know he was adopted either. It doesn't make any difference to me."

Kathy put her arms around Jay's neck. He hugged her back.

"Let's go back and do a skit for the others. We'll have to think of something good," Jay said. He nodded to his mother.

Sybil went to the door, grabbed a coat off the peg and stepped out into the garden. She could just make out the two men standing by the carriage house. She went to Rory and put her arms around him. He put an arm around her and hugged her.

"Jay's taking care of Kathy," Sybil said. "I think she'll be ok, but I believe you will have more explaining to do."

"I'm glad she's alright. It's pushed a difficult conversation earlier than I would have liked it," Rory said giving Sybil another hug.

"Mum, you can't let Merilee get away with this, neither of you can. She did it deliberately. She was pestering me and Jay with questions about your two's relationship earlier."

"I don't intend to let her get away with it," Sybil replied. "I'd like to wring her neck."

"Well, I for one couldn't care less whether you're adopted or not," Riordan said. "It doesn't make any difference to me."

"Let's go back in where it's warm," Sybil said.

"Your mother and I need to have a word," Rory said when they got back in the house. "We'll be back in in a few minutes."

"I'm sorry she did that," Sybil said.

"Don't apologize for her. It wasn't your fault. I should have told Kathy a long time ago. I just didn't know how to tell a child about the whole ugly mess."

"It won't be easy but she'll understand."

"Your probably right."

"Part of this is my fault too," Sybil said. "I should have told Merilee I was considering a relationship with you. I told the boys last summer. They were both supportive of whatever decision I made. I didn't tell her because she can be difficult."

"Sybil, I don't want to come between you and your daughter," he said. "Maybe we should call everything off right now. I'll go back to Ireland and that will be that."

"You're not getting off that easy," Sybil said. She slid her arms around his waist and pulled him close. "My family almost drove Tom and I apart. We had a terrible row when we told them we were married. We had another one when I told them you had been a rebel. I didn't give in to family pressure then and I won't now."

"She's your daughter. It's different."

"She's selfish and stubborn. She always has been. This isn't the first trouble she's caused and I'm sure it won't be the last. Tom always gave her the benefit of the doubt. Don't you want to be with me?"

"I do but not if it's going to cause you trouble and cause a rift between you and your daughter."

"Don't you care for me enough to weather the storm with me?" Sybil asked him.

"I do care for you. I love you," he said.

"I love you too. I would have like to have told you under better circumstances."

"It doesn't matter."

"I'm going to have a talk with Merilee, tonight," Sybil said.

"Kiss me first for luck?"

"Of course, I may need it," she replied.


	26. Crossing the Sea

Crossing the Sea

"Merilee, I'd like a word with you," Sybil said when she and Rory went back to the drawing room.

"Can't it wait, Mum?" Merilee said. From the looks she had gotten her brothers she knew she was in for a battle with her mother.

"No, I'd like to speak to you now, alone," she said.

Rory had gone over to his daughter and was talking to her quietly. Sybil saw Kathy put her arms around her father's neck for a contented hug before she went back to her game with Jay.

Sybil took Merilee to her bedroom and closed the door behind them.

"You owe Rory an apology," Sybil said before Merilee had a chance to speak.

"I just asked a simple question," Merilee sniffed.

"We both know it was more than that. You hurt him and you hurt Kathy. It was completely uncalled for."

"Your behavior with him is uncalled for," Merilee shot back. "Da has only been dead a year and a half and your making eyes with another man."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I was avoiding telling you because I knew you would be upset. It's time for me to move on with my life Merilee. We aren't doing anything disrespectful to your father's memory. I care for Rory and I am pursuing a relationship with him. It doesn't change the fact that you owe him an apology."

"How could you? You're with Rory, of all people? Are you sleeping with him?"

"No, I am not sleeping with him. Why wouldn't I be interested in Rory? We have common interests and I've known him for years. He delivered you for goodness sake."

"He's younger than you."

"Only by three years. Stop evading the topic of your behavior. You were being deliberately cruel. You will go and apologize immediately."

"I will not."

"You most certainly will."

"If Da was here things would be different."

"If your father was here things most certainly would be different. I would still be married to the man I love and he would tell you the same thing I am. You owe Rory an apology. Your father would have been ashamed of your behavior."

Merilee looked like she had been slapped. She was embarrassed. Her father would have been ashamed of her.

"Fine, I'll apologize before he leaves."

"No. You will apologize tonight. You don't have to like my choices in my personal life, but you do need to respect them. I am interested in Rory and I will not tolerate any more interference."

"Alright you win. I will apologize tonight and I will be civil."

"That is all I ask."

"Mum," Merilee said as they headed back to the drawing room. "Janine had the baby last month. Are you ever going to learn to knit?"

"Don't remind me," Sybil said with a groan. "I'm a grandmother who can't knit. What kind of grandmother is that?"

"One that makes a pretty good mother," Merilee replied.

Early Boxing Day Riordan and his wife left for London. Merilee and her fiancée were off on another train a few minutes later. Jay and Kathy had become quite taken with each other over the holiday. She was fascinated by his explanations of how electrical things worked and he was only too happy to have a willing audience for his technical explanations. After seeing the others off the two of them had gone off to explore some of Jay's old summer haunts.

"They remind me of Tom and I when he first came to Downton," Sybil told Rory as they headed back to the house. "He was so quiet until he started talking about politics and then he never stopped."

"She's still a little girl," Rory said stiffening a bit.

"I didn't mean that. I just meant they get on so well. He never got along with Merilee like that."

"So you think we should make them officially brother and sister?" he asked.

"Are you asking for my opinion or something else?

"I'm asking if you'll marry me?"

Sybil was quiet and didn't answer right away.

"I have to admit the thought has crossed my mind, but I have a few concerns. I had a very happy marriage with Tom but we made some mistakes. I've been thinking about them these last few months and I don't want to repeat them. I want you to promise me you'll take at least a two week vacation every year and we'll go and visit family or go somewhere new."

"I work long hours Sybil, but I do take time off. You know what medicine is. If I didn't I would never stand up to it all. If you want to travel outside of Ireland or England then that is what we'll do when the war is over."

"There's something else," Sybil paused before she continued. "I'm quite well off. I want to use my money to make our life easier. Tom was too proud to accept my money. We could have travelled and done everything we dreamed about. Instead he worked and worked. By the time the children had grown up it was too late."

"How much are we talking about?"

Sybil named a sum that made Rory's face pale slightly.

"I had no idea," he said. "You've always lived such a no nonsense life despite the big house and family connections. I always though you were the poor relations with a well paying job."

"No, I've had the money since before Riordan was born."

Rory thought it over for a few minutes.

"Alright," he finally said. "If you want to go on a trip or something big comes up that you want to buy you can pay for it. I don't want a maid or a butler. My housekeeper is quite enough."

"I don't want extra servants either. A housekeeper suites me perfectly well."

"Are those your only conditions?" Rory asked her. He stopped walking and turned towards her.

"I have one more. It's more of a request really," Sybil said looking down. She didn't know how he was going to take it. "When I die, I want to buried next to Tom."

"That's a long ways off, Sybil," Rory said with a sigh.

"We both know there is no way to predict the future," Sybil replied. "We could have a few months or we could have another forty years. It's how I feel."

"I would like to see him moved back to Ireland to the same graveyard as his mother," he said. They started walking again. Rory had his hands in his pockets. Sybil was reminded of the many times she had seen Tom do the same thing when he was wrestling with a decision. After a few minutes he spoke.

"I'll agree to that on one condition. You will be buried between us, one on either side. If you wind up with a third husband he will have to take your feet," he said trying to make light of the situation.

"You're a good man, Rory Lester," Sybil said hugging his arm tight against her.

"I try to be," he said.

They had reached the house but continued on towards the estate to give themselves time to discuss things.

"What about you? You must have some concerns," Sybil said.

"A few. For one thing I don't want to live in the big house in London. Listowel and County Kerry are my home. I don't want to leave it."

"Tom was the city boy. I'm from Yorkshire. I went where it made him happy to be, but I like the country. Listowel is beautiful. I could easily call it home. Anything else?"

"If we do travel over the next few years, we take Kathy with us. I want her treated as part of the family."

"I already think of her as part of the family. I don't know if she'll accept me as a second mother, but I can try."

He got down on one knee in the snow and took her hand.

"Then you'll accept me?" Rory asked.

"I will," she said a smile. He stood up and pulled her into an embrace.

"You won't regret this," he said as he swung her around.

"You will if you don't stop swinging me in circles," Sybil said laughing. "I'm getting dizzy."

He set her on her feet and kissed her.

"Who should we tell first?" he asked with a wide grin.

"Kathy and Jay. My mother wasn't at my last wedding. I'd like her to be at this one."

"Very well. Our train isn't till six. We have until then to tell the whole world. I wish we didn't have to go so soon, but I really do have to get back."

"I'll get things taken care of here and come over after the New Year. Does that suite you?" Sybil asked.

"Quite well," he said before he kissed her deeply.

That evening when the house was quiet and Sybil had gone to her bedroom she sat for a long time at the vanity and stared at her wedding ring on her finger that had rested there for over twenty-four years. At long last she slid it off and put it in her jewelry box. It was time to move on with her life and look towards the future instead of the past.

In mid January Sybil's bags were packed and she was ready to leave. She had gone to see her daughter and had a long talk with her. Merilee hadn't taken the news of Sybil's engagement well, but she had finally come to understand that her mother needed to move forward.

"It doesn't mean I love your father any less," Sybil told her. "I'll love him till the day I die, but I love Rory as well. He makes me happy."

"I don't want to loose you Mom," Merilee said tearfully.

"You aren't loosing me. I'll be just over the sea. You can visit anytime you want. You and John are talking of going to America when the war is over. It will be further to visit but we'll still do it."

Before she left Downton Sybil stopped by Tom's grave. She stayed until she had to leave to catch her train.

"I'm going to Ireland now, my love. I'm starting a new adventure. I'll bring you to join me when I can."

Six months after Sybil and Rory were married, Sybil was surprised one morning to find herself feeling sick.

"I haven't felt like this since I was…oh no," she groaned before she dashed to the washroom and lost her breakfast.

She had been working as a nurse at the local hospital where three local doctors had their offices. There were a few more doctors now in the area than there had been twenty years ago, the odd car dotted the streets and there were a few more houses than the first time Sybil had visited Listowel, but the town and the surrounding area remained much as it had always been.

"You're suspicions are confirmed, Mrs. Lester," Dr. Nolan told her the next day. "You are in fact pregnant."

"But how did this happen doctor?" Sybil said in shock.

"I would assume in the usual way."

"I meant I haven't had my monthly cycle in at least eight months. I thought I was done with all that."

"You've had a great many changes in your life. It isn't uncommon for a woman of forty-five to experience an erratic cycle as you start into mid-life. In many cases women experience a period of heightened fertility. Things may very well go back to normal after you deliver."

"Oh my," Sybil replied. "I'm not as old as I thought I was."

That evening when Rory got off the train from Tralee where he worked three days a week as Chief Surgeon at the General Hospital, Sybil was standing at the platform to meet him.

"I'm surprised to see you down here today," he said as he gave her a quick kiss. "What's the occasion?"

"I wanted to ask you what you thought of Collin for a name for a baby," Sybil replied.

"It's a fine name. Who's having a baby?"

"We are."

"But we're too old," Rory blurted out in shock then immediately blushed crimson when he thought about what they had done to conceive a child in the first place.

"Apparently not," Sybil said laughing at his shocked expression. "You had best close your mouth before you catch a bug."

Rory closed his mouth and began to smile.

"The next time you write to Riordan tell him I best be having a word with the postman."

"Rory are you ever going to let him live that down?" Sybil said with a laugh.

"Never," Rory said laughing.

In 1984 Collin Lester stood by his father Rory's grave while the casket was lowered into the ground beside his mother's. His mother, Sybil had died four years earlier and been laid to rest beside her first husband in the small cemetery in Listowel, Ireland. He had been just a young boy, when her first husband's body had been returned to Ireland but he had always remembered the grief his parents and older brothers had shared as his body was laid to rest for the final time in the simple ceremony.

His older brother Jay had returned for a visit a few months later and again soon after. When his sister Kathy turned eighteen they were wed. There had been some disagreements in the family about the union until it had been pointed out by both of them that they technically had no blood relationship. Collin had just been a little boy but he clearly remembered his mother forgetting his brother's name and calling him Tom.

Today his eldest brother Riordan was there, his hair now almost completely white with his wife, children and some of their grandchildren. Merilee and her husband had come from America, her dark hair was now streaked with white. Jay and Kathy were there as well with their children who all so strongly resembled their now passed on relatives.

He would miss his father. He had always had a ready smile, a soft heart and yarn to spin no matter how grey the day had seemed. Collin squeezed his wife's hand and glanced at his mother's final resting place.

The epitaph on her tombstone read:

Lady Sybil Crawley Branson Lester

1897 - 1980

Wife of Tom 23 years

Wife of Rory 37 years

She Was Loved

The End


	27. Kathy and Jay Part I

The Romance of Kathy and Jay

Chapter One

The train pulled out of the Downton station late in the day Boxing Day 1942. Jay Branson stood on the platform beside his mother and watched until the train was out of site. He hadn't been surprised earlier in the day when his mother Sybil Branson had announced her engagement to Rory Lester. The writing had been on the wall. Only a fool wouldn't have been able to see it coming.

Jay had always liked the man. He was almost a second father to him. His own father Tom Branson had been dead now a year and a half. Jay missed his father. He had always been the one to listen to what Jay had to say. When he had been younger his father had shown him how to fix cars and never gotten annoyed when Jay took a notion to dismantle things to see how they worked. A few times his father had patiently sat with him and helped him put something back together when Jay couldn't figure things out for himself. He hadn't felt that kind of connection with anyone else until two days ago.

Rory Lester's daughter Kathy was only thirteen years old, but he had found a stronger connection with her than he ever had with another person besides his father. She had listened to what he told her. Really listened, not the polite nods and agreements most people made when his explanations got too technical. She had asked questions that proved she was listening. When he had gotten overly technical she had asked him to explain things again in a way she could understand. She was like a breath of fresh air. He would be happy to have her as a stepsister.

As he walked back to the house with his mother his thoughts turned to his one and only foray into the world of romance. That had been a disaster from the start. June had somehow found out his brother was heir to Viscount Branksome. She had nodded and cooed politely when he talked about technical matters. She really hadn't been listening. Jay suspected she had been bored stiff behind her fluttering eyelashes and pretty smile. Her ardor had cooled considerably when she found out he would not be inheriting a family fortune, and further still when he had told her he was Catholic and had no desire to convert. The final nail in the coffin had come when he had addressed the maid in her family's home in Irish. The same day she had given him his ring back and that was the last he had seen of her.

"You and Kathy certainly seemed to hit it off," his mother commented.

"She's a nice girl, with something between the ears. I enjoy her company," Jay replied.

"She'll be your step sister in a few months. It will nice for you to have a sister you get along with."

Sybil had been concerned about Jay since his father's death. They had been so close. Their looks were almost identical. They shared similar personalities as well. Both had difficulty relating to people who could not keep up with their quick minds. Jay and Riordan his older brother had always been the best of friends, but now with both of them grown men and pursuing separate careers, they had few chances to get together. Jay had mentioned that he had made some friends among his co-workers. He was not anti-social by any means. He loved to dance and his looks attracted girls by the drove. As soon as he started to speak their attention waned, as they could not keep up. He had shown some interest in a few girls over the years, but his interest quickly shifted as he found out they had nothing to talk about.

"It will certainly be a change," Jay replied. "You seem happy with how things are going."

"I am," she replied. "It will be a good match I think. We have a lot in common and he's a good person. He's certainly easy to get along with."

"Just be happy, Mum."

Jay hadn't been able to get away from work for his mother's wedding. He worked for the War Department designing electrical systems. His work was highly classified and his time off was dependent on the demands of the project he was working on. The end of the war couldn't come soon enough for Jay. Some day he would design systems that would improve lives instead of take them. For now there was little choice.

It was late summer by the time Jay got time off to travel to Ireland to visit his mother and her new husband. He and Kathy had rekindled their friendship from Christmas and they had been almost inseparable during his five-day visit. When their parents were working Jay and Kathy had taken picnic lunches and traveled by horseback to the beach were they had jumped in the waves. She had shown him her sketches of flowers and scenes around the area. He had been impressed by the complexity of her drawing. They walked along the old monorail and through the hills talking of everything and nothing. His mother was happy and had told him he would have a new sibling early in the New Year. The entire family had gone fishing and much to Jay's surprise his mother had actually caught one. It had been a good time and he had been sorry to leave.

Over the next few years, his trips to visit the family had been much the same. Every time he saw Kathy they fell back into a pattern of easy camaraderie. After one trip he had spotted a set of watercolors in a shop window and sent her a package of painting supplies. She had written back to thank him and they had started corresponding outside of the letters he exchanged with his mother. Just after Kathy had turned sixteen she had asked his advice about dating. A boy in the village had asked her out to a dance, but her father had refused permission for her to go, saying the boy wasn't the kind of young man she should be associating with. Jay had written back advising her to accept her father's judgment in this instance. Her father was a good man. If he had reservations about a boy, it was most likely with good reason.

A few months later Kathy had written the same boy had been caught trying to break into the local pub. Jay was right about her father's judgment and she would listen to him from now on.

In 1946 it was a year since the war was over and the permits were finally in place to return his father's body to Ireland. He and his brother Riordan accompanied the body on the trip to his father's final resting place. When Jay stepped off the train, Kathy had been there to greet him. Her eyes were as blue as the sky and her hair had darkened slightly from the last time he'd seen her to the color of wildflower honey. She was by far one of the prettiest girls he'd ever seen. He had greeted his mother first and then Rory. When he turned to Kathy she had given him a quick hug and kiss on the cheek. He had kissed her back and looked into her eyes as he slowly released her. He was lost. A slow smile had crept across his face, if it hadn't been for his brother addressing a question to him, he would have pulled her into his arms and kissed her right then and there. As it was he straightened up and carried on with the business at hand lifting his little brother Collin into his arms to carry him back to the house.

"How old are you now, Kathy?" Riordan asked her that evening at dinner.

"Seventeen," Kathy replied.

"Any idea what you want to do now that you have finished school?" Riordan asked.

"I'm not sure. I was going to take the winter and think about it. I'm very interested in plants. I was thinking of maybe studying botany or horticulture. I like to draw and paint pictures of different plants around the area. Would you like to see some of them? Jay sent me some paints years ago. It got me started with painting."

"Since when did you become a patron of the arts?" Riordan asked him.

"Sending our youngest sister some paints is hardly being a patron of the arts," Jay replied.

"You certainly hit on something she's fond of," Rory said. "She's done some lovely scenery pieces as well."

"Whatever you decide to do with your life, Kathy, we'll support you," Sybil chimed in. "As long as you think things through. Have Riordan tell you about the argument he had with his father over his career. You wouldn't believe how pig headed he was when he was young."

"Oh mother," Riordan said in exasperation. "I was only twenty then."

"And you're such an old man now at twenty-seven," his mother retorted.

"What I was originally try to say was that I wanted to invite Kathy to come back to England with us for a visit for a few weeks. Janine would love to see her," Riordan said. He turned to Rory. "With your permission of course."

"Oh Da, could I?" Kathy said excitedly.

"I don't like the idea of you traveling back alone," Rory said.

"I'd see her back," Jay volunteered. "I'm working in Chelmsford now, just north of London. It wouldn't be any trouble. Riordan and I have been talking about trading cars. He needs a family car and the sportster needs constant maintenance. I'm a better mechanic than he is. She could drive back to Chelmsford with me. It would give me a chance to show Kathy where I work so I won't have to answer her mountain of questions."

"Jay, I don't ask that many questions," Kathy shot back with a smile. She knew he enjoyed her questions. That was why she asked them. Jay was smiling at her with one of his wide grins.

"I'll make sure you get home safe," Jay said.

"Alright, as long as your mother has no objections, you can go," Rory said.

"I'm sure Riordan and Jay will take very good care of her," Sybil reassured her husband.

"Oh how delightful," Kathy exclaimed. Jay was grinning at Kathy like a fool.

It was a look that made his mother take pause. Jay and his late father were identical in looks. She would have sworn it was Tom across the table from her, not Jay if she didn't know better. She had seen that look on her late husband's face more than once when he had gotten his own way about something. She shook her head. It was Riordan who had done the inviting not Jay.

The next day they went to the cemetery for the burial ceremony. As the priest read the words over Tom's coffin and it was lowered into the ground for the last time, the tears ran down Sybil's cheeks. Her husband was no less affected and her two eldest sons' faces were solemn. Kathy was standing beside Jay holding their youngest brother Collin by the hand. She looked up at Jay to see a deep look of sadness on his face. She slipped her free hand into his. His fingers closed around hers. He turned his head to look down at her and she could have sworn she saw tears forming in the corners of his eyes. He held her hand until the ceremony was finished only letting go slowly once she needed to see to Collin.

Back at the house, her father brought out a bottle of whiskey and they proceeded to have a wake among the family. They told stories of Tom's life and the misadventures they had all gotten into. Through the exchange Kathy had been watching Jay. She hadn't managed to kiss a boy yet. Her father was much too strict to let any of the boys from the local village anywhere near her. She had been wondering what it would feel like to kiss Jay since his visit last year. He was so terribly handsome a thrill went up her spine just thinking about it. Everyone called him her brother although they technically had no blood relationship. She wondered if Jay thought of her as a sister or had the same awareness of her. Somehow she would get him to kiss her. She just didn't know how yet.

"Do you still like to dance?" Kathy asked Jay abruptly.

"Of course I do," he replied.

"There's a dance tomorrow. Would you like to go?" Kathy said suddenly feeling shy. It wasn't like she hadn't gone to dances in town with Jay before when he was visiting.

"We'll all go," her father said. "Collin can stay with Mrs. Shay."

Kathy smiled and chewed her lip a bit. It wasn't quite what she had in mind. She still had a few tricks up her sleeve to get Jay alone.

Jay's heart had sunk a little at Rory's statement. He would have liked to have Kathy all to himself for an evening. His plan to get Riordan to invite her to England had worked. He may have mentioned on the trip over that he thought Kathy would like to get away for a few weeks now that she was finished school. His older brother had taken the bait, hook line and sinker. Jay had been having feelings for Kathy since the previous year. He wasn't sure if they were out of his own loneliness or if it was something more. When he had stepped off the train and looked into her eyes. He knew his feelings were real. She was the girl for him, but he had no idea how he was going to convince her of that or their family.

Before they went to bed that night, the men decided to go on a fishing expedition the next day. Kathy scuffed her shoe on the floor as they made their plans. There was no way she was going to be able to get Jay alone unless she did something drastic. If she got caught that would be the end of the trip to London or anywhere else until she was at least twenty-one.

It had been a hot day and the house was still warm. There was no way Kathy would ever be able sleep thinking about Jay and the way he had held her hand at the graveside. She just had to know if he liked her back. It was driving her crazy. She went up to her room, put on her bathing costume with a summer dress over top. She opened the door to her room a crack to see if she could spot him heading to the washroom downstairs. It was an old fashioned house and the washroom facilities had been added at the back of the house on the lower level around ten years ago. After a few minutes, she was rewarded as she saw him heading down the stairs.

She went down to the kitchen to wait until he was done. When he came back into the kitchen he paused.

"Kathy what are you doing down here?" Jay asked.

"It's so warm. I was wondering if you might like to go swimming," she said shyly. She suddenly felt so shy in his presence. She never had before. "I found a new spot, I wanted to share with you."

"I don't think it's such a good idea," he said suddenly serious. "It's late. It might not look good. You're not a little girl anymore."

"I just thought you might like to go with me," she said suddenly downcast.

"I didn't say that. Of course I want to go with you. I didn't bring swim trunks. I didn't think we'd have time to go to the beach since we're leaving the day after tomorrow."

"You can wear your underclothes. It's late. No one ever goes out to this spot. No one will see."

"You'll see," he said quietly. He couldn't stop staring into her eyes.

"I promise not to look."

Jay nodded finally. He knew there would be hell to pay if anyone realized they were gone, but he wanted to spend some time with her without the rest of the family tagging along.

Kathy got a bridle from the barn and put it on one of the horses.

"Oh no you don't Realta," she said to her father's horse. "He's liable to steal our cloths and leave us to walk back," she said to Jay. "He's getting older but he can still find mischief wherever he goes."

Kathy mounted bareback and waited for Jay to mount behind her before they set off. She walked the horse away from the house so as not to make too much noise. She could feel Jay's breath on the back of her neck and his hands on her waist where he held her.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked him.

"You," he said with a soft chuckle.

"What about me?" Kathy asked him.

"I was thinking that other than our parents being married and sharing a half sibling, we're not actually related."

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" she asked. The same thought had occurred to her more than once. She directed the horse onto a lane away from the main road.

"I guess it depends how you look at it," he said then fell silent.

Kathy directed the horse into a meadow. They were following a faint trail in the moonlight. She could feel something pressing against the cheek of her bum, but wasn't sure what it was. What ever he had in his pocket was as hard as a rock. They rode for about fifteen minutes when they finally rounded a small hill to discover the sound of running water. Kathy halted the horse. Jay dismounted first and reached up to help her down. She slid off into his arms. Her body brushed his on the way down. They stood staring at each other for a few seconds until she said, "It's over here." She tethered the horse to a bush and then took Jay's hand to lead him through some bushes. They passed through the bushes to find themselves at the base of a small waterfall as it dropped over an embankment with a shallow pool at the bottom. The area was surrounded by small bushes and not visible unless you were standing almost on top of it.

"It's a lovely spot," Jay said quietly.

"It gets better," Kathy said with excitement. She took off her dress to reveal her swimsuit underneath. Jay had gone stock still when she started to take her dress off until he realized she was wearing something underneath.

"Are you going to get undressed or not?" she asked. He nodded and took off his shirt, then stripped down to his drawers. He was a bit embarrassed by his erection protruding out but it was so dark he was pretty sure she wouldn't notice. At least he hoped she wouldn't.

"This will be tricky in the dark," Kathy told him. "Stay close to the wall and follow me." She took his hand and lead him along the side of the waterfall until they passed through the spray and were in a small washed out area behind the fall. It was cold compared to the heat of the air outside and made goose bumps form on their skin. There was just enough room for them to stand.

"What do you think?" Kathy asked him. The moonlight was playing on the water and reflecting like a million diamonds on the cascading falls.

"It's beautiful," Jay said. He was feeling suddenly tongue-tied in her presence. He looked at her smiling face and swallowed. "Like you," he whispered.

With the noise of the water Kathy wasn't sure she'd heard him correctly. She looked at him the smile slowly fading from her face.

"Do you think us not being related by blood is a good thing?" she asked.

"It's definitely a good thing," Jay replied quietly. He moved closer to her and pulled her towards him until she was facing him.

"I was thinking the same thing," she breathed. Her lips were parted and her eyes half closed waiting for his kiss.

He slowly lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her. Her arms snaked their way up to his shoulders as she kissed him back. He took his time, tasting every inch of her lips and relishing the feel of her skin against his. When the kiss finally ended, she pulled back slightly.

"I'm very glad indeed," she said with a sigh.

He was ready for another kiss, but Kathy had other ideas and walked through the wall of water and into the pool. Jay had no choice but to follow her. The water roared against him pummeling his body for an instant as he stepped through into the pool. He slipped on a rock and fell into the deeper water with a splash.

"Oh Jay, are you all right?" she cried rushing to him.

He stood up in the waist deep water.

"I will be if you kiss me again," he said as he reached for her and pulled her into his arms. He kissed her again as slowly as he had the first time. Kathy's head was swimming. It felt wonderful to finally kiss him. The real thing had been better than all of her dreams and fantasies. The chill of the water finally drove them to sit on a rock further from the water. The rock had not fully cooled from the heat of the afternoon and it warmed their bodies slightly as they sat together. Sometime during one of the kisses they exchanged Kathy had felt his tongue slid along her lips then into her mouth when she parted her lips slightly. The sensation made her groan. It was everything and more she had dreamed of. She didn't know how they would ever stop.

"We've got to go back," Jay said finally. He stood up and pulled her up beside him. He pulled her into her arms again only to have Kathy step back suddenly.

"What is that?" she asked suddenly alarmed.

"What is what?" he said quizzically.

"That," she said indicating his erection.

Jay blushed every color or red possible. He was glad it was dark.

"It's me," he said quietly. "That's what happens to men when they like someone."

"I…I didn't know," Kathy said embarrassed.

"I didn't expect you would," Jay said pulling her against him and placing a kiss on her forehead.

Kathy put her arms around his waist and leaned her head on his chest.

"I feel a bit silly. You must think me a naive little girl."

"No. I think you're a very beautiful young woman, who has lead a very sheltered life. I wouldn't want it any other way," he said quietly.

"Jay, have you kissed many girls?" Kathy asked him shyly. "You do it awfully well."

"A few," he said. "Most find me boring once they get past how I look."

"I don't find you boring. I like what you have to say and I like how you kiss."

"We'll have to do it again sometime," he said.

"Promise?"

"I promise I will never get tired of kissing you," he said.

Kathy went to get her dress while Jay pulled his clothes back on. He didn't bother to button his shirt. On the way back he rode in front with Kathy behind him. Her arms were around him. Her hands stroked the hair on his chest as they road and her cheek rested against his back.

Once they had dismounted and turned the horse back into the paddock. Jay pulled her into his embrace for a last kiss before they turned in. He undressed as quietly as he could before he slipped into bed beside Riordan.

"Where have you been?" Riordan mumbled.

"We went swimming," Jay replied quietly.

"You better not get caught. Rory will kill you if he finds you sniffing around his daughter."

"Nothing happened," Jay lied. "We just went swimming to get cooled off."

"The next thing you're going to tell me it was my idea to have Kathy come to England for a visit with us."

"Oh shut up and go to sleep," Jay grumbled.

"You brother are in for a heap of trouble," Riordan said before he rolled on his stomach and went back to sleep.

* * *

Chapter Two

The next morning Kathy stayed home to pack for her trip to London while her father and the men went fishing. They took Collin along much to Kathy's relief. Her little brother loved nothing more than to investigate everything she did. It made getting things done take twice as long. When she finally had two cases stuffed with her things she was ready. She had her sketchbook and watercolors packed as well incase she had a chance to draw. She hadn't been to London since she was seven and didn't remember much about it.

Her stepmother was home this morning as was Mrs. Shay their housekeeper. Kathy had never stopped calling Sybil, "Auntie." She was young when her mother died but out of respect for her it didn't feel right calling another woman Mummy. They weren't mother and daughter but they were close. Sybil had noticed Kathy twisting the ends of her hair. It was a sure sign something was on her mind.

"Kathy would you like to go for a walk with me into town?" Sybil asked her.

"Yes, Auntie I would," Kathy said. She wanted to ask Sybil about what happened between a man and woman. She couldn't ask her father. He blushed if he left the buttons on his shirt open.

They set off into town a few minutes later. Kathy wanted to ask Sybil but she didn't know how to broach the topic.

"Are you excited about your trip?" Sybil asked her.

"Yes, I am. I feel so grown up, even though I'll be with Riordan or Jay the entire time. It's not like much can happen."

"Is something bothering you about the trip?"

"Not about the trip. I wanted to ask. Well, I don't know quite how to ask you. I couldn't ask Da. He gets too embarrassed…I wondered if you could tell me…What happens when people get married...You know on their wedding night?"

Sybil sighed. Kathy was a bit old to be asking these questions, then again Sybil's own mother hadn't told her a thing. She had found out all kinds of things when she went to nurse's training. If it hadn't been for that she would have been exactly the same way.

"What has your father told you?" Sybil asked.

"Not much. He said boys want more than kissing and that I should wait until I was married."

"Well, he was right about boys wanting more and you should wait. It can be difficult at times but waiting for the right person is worth it in the end. I assume you want to know the mechanics of what happens?"

"I'm not planning on it or anything," she said in alarm. "I just want to know. Other people talk and I feel so stupid."

"I know that feeling well," Sybil said. "Well, you know how men and women are different. When boys grow up into men that part grows too." Sybil indicated a bench along the lane where they could sit while they talked. "Kissing is part of it and touching. You touch each other there and then when things are ready, the mans' part gets harder and he puts it inside the woman."

Kathy had a shocked look on her face.

"Doesn't it hurt?" she gasped.

"The first time it hurts a bit. The more relaxed you are the less it hurts. The touching helps with that. You have to really trust the person and love them for things to work right. If you love them then it starts to feel lovely."

"I don't know if I'd like to do that," Kathy said her brow wrinkling.

"If you love the other person enough you'll want to do that and more," Sybil reassured her laying her hand over her stepdaughter's.

"I guess you're right," Kathy replied. She was thinking about the previous evening and kissing Jay. She hadn't wanted to stop. She'd wanted to keep going and going testing out every new sensation. His body part certainly had been hard enough to do exactly what Sybil described. "I'll have to think it over."

"There's no rush to find the right boy," Sybil reassured her. "One day he'll just show up and you'll know."

"Did you know right away with Uncle Tom?" Kathy asked.

"It took me a long time to admit how I felt," Sybil said. "He was so terribly handsome. Riordan is very like him, but Jay is exactly the same. I had a terrible crush on Uncle Tom at first or at least that's what I thought it was. Then he kissed me and I knew without a doubt that I had loved him from the first time I ever saw him. Your father was different. I first met him when he was young. I loved him because he needed me to and I was already married. Later after Uncle Tom had died I realized I had loved him more and more over the years until I couldn't deny just how much. He makes me laugh. He always makes the day brighter and he is very handsome."

"I can see why you loved Uncle Tom right away if he looked like Jay. He is terribly handsome. I think he is the most handsome boy I've ever seen," Kathy said with a small smile.

"You'll be the envy of every girl at the dance with your two brothers to dance with," Sybil said. She hadn't been looking at Kathy when she had declared how handsome Jay was. If she had she would have seen the look of a girl who was quickly falling for someone if she hadn't already.

After tea when everyone was back at the house Jay quickly declared he and Kathy would do the washing up. No one thought it was unusual as two of them often did chores together when he was visiting.

"I'm going to be very jealous tonight and not let anyone else dance with you," he said while he was washing the dishes.

"Not even Riordan or Da?" Kathy teased him. She was standing beside him drying dishes. His arm kept bumping into her. She wasn't sure if it was by accident or on purpose but she didn't mind one bit.

"They can dance with Mum," he declared. "You're all mine."

"Are you jealous?" Kathy said flirting with him a little.

"Profusely," Jay said looking around to see if anyone was about before he dropped a quick kiss on her mouth.

"You know if my Da catches us, he'll throw you in the street," Kathy said with a small laugh.

"Well, we'll just have to make sure he doesn't catch on until we're good and ready," Jay said.

Kathy laughed a little at the look on his face.

"You look like you're ready to do battle," she said.

"For you I would joust windmills."

Kathy headed off to get ready for the dance once they had finished up. She definitely had a crush on Jay. She felt a rush of excitement whenever he was around. Her lips tingled and a knot formed in her stomach at thought of kissing him again. Was this what it was to fall in love? If it was it felt awfully nice.

Kathy danced the first two dances with Jay. Riordan got fed up with being a wallflower and snatched her away from his brother. Then she danced with her father. Across the room Kathy spotted Jay surrounded by a flock of the local girls. A strong jab of jealousy shot through her at the sight. They had always gone to dances on their own before and the issue of dancing with someone else had never come up. She managed to keep her face impassive and smiled at her father even though she was watching for Jay out of the corner of her eye. As soon as the dance was finished Jay was back at her side handing her a glass of punch. The flock of girls was still following him. Riordan had shushed the few that had approached him away quickly with a flash of his wedding ring. At the sound of his Oxford accent the few that hadn't been dissuaded quickly dispersed.

"They're like hounds after a fox," Riordan said to Rory when he went to stand with him during a break with a nod at Jay.

"Your brother is young, attractive and single. Why wouldn't they be?"

"Wait until he opens his mouth. Everyone thinks I'm the dull one. I've got nothing on him."

"Kathy doesn't find him dull."

"Your daughter is unusually clever. She can keep up with him and then some. I hope she's thinking about school."

Rory sighed.

"I don't know. She doesn't know what she wants. This trip to London with you will do her some good. Maybe it will help her make up her mind. She definitely isn't interested in medicine."

"I'll keep an eye on her."

"I know you will. You're brother on the other hand spoils her rotten."

"And would protect her with his life," Riordan said.

"What makes you say that?" Rory asked.

Riordan had been watching Jay and Kathy while he was speaking to Rory. A young man had approached the two of them and asked Kathy to dance. It looked like she had declined his request and he wasn't about to take no for an answer. Jay had quickly stepped between the two. It looked like a fight was brewing. Riordan headed over to his brother's side with Rory only a few steps behind.

"What makes you think you can come in here and take our girls you limey prick," the local man challenged Jay.

"I'm here with Kathy. She has declined your offer, now I suggest you move on," Jay said. He looked like a thundercloud. His mother had just come back from the ladies room to see what looked like her son getting into a fight with another man.

"What's going on here?" Rory demanded. At the sight of Kathy's father the other man took a step back. Riordan had put a protective arm around Kathy and was shielding her with his body.

"Not much Dr. Lester. I was just asking Kathy to dance when her toff English boyfriend got in the way."

"This is not her boyfriend. He is my stepson and Kathy's brother. You owe my daughter an apology. In the future when a girl says no, I suggest you accept it."

"Sorry, miss," the man said. He shot Jay a dirty parting look.

Sybil arrived to see what was going on. Kathy was looking at Jay like he was a knight in shining armor with Riordan on the other side of her rolling his eyes slightly.

"Now what did those two get into," Sybil asked her husband.

"They were just defending Kathy. She'll be fine with them. They take care of her like she was a baby chick."

Sybil looked at them to see Jay with an arm around Kathy and Riordan looking exasperated. Some things never changed with her sons.

That evening when they were getting into bed, Riordan was folding his cloths over a chair in the room he was sharing with Jay.

"You had best keep you hands off her while she's in England," Riordan warned Jay. "Promise me, or I will call the whole thing off."

"I promise I won't do anything with Kathy I haven't already done," Jay said seriously.

"Jay, you're headed for trouble. You better not have been lying with her."

"I haven't. Christ Riordan what do you take me for? I haven't done anything other than kiss her."

"You had best keep it at that. I remember what you were like when you first went to Cambridge."

"Were you any better?"

"I married the one I was sleeping with."

"You were just lucky. I found out those girls were after someone with an education that would make a lot of money and family connections. I realized pretty quickly they weren't really interested in me. I always used protection. I haven't been with anyone else since I broke up with June. She was as bad as the rest of them, worse even. I started hanging out with Kathy soon afterwards. That was four years ago."

Jay was lying on his back staring at the ceiling.

"You know she had no idea the kind of money I'm making," Jay said. "She likes me for me."

"You've got it bad. You know Rory is going to have a fit when he finds out."

"I haven't asked her to marry me yet. She might say no."

Riordan just snorted.

"You're as bad as our father. It took him years to get Mum," Riordan said. "I don't know why I'm helping you."

"Because you know underneath it all, I'm just a lonely pathetic dolt with no prospect of ever finding a woman my own age."

"Just mind your manners," Riordan said squashing his pillow up under his head. "She is our sister after all."

"No, actually she isn't." Jay replied as he turned out the light.

* * *

Chapter Three

"I'm home and I've brought company," Riordan called when he and Kathy got in the front door of the house in London he shared with his wife and two children.

Janine came up the stairs to welcome him home and stopped in surprise.

"Kathy, I wasn't expecting you. Welcome to London. You could have sent a cable," she chided Riordan.

"We got a bright idea to bring Kathy back with us on the ferry over," Riordan said. "I didn't think you'd mind."

"I don't mind at all," Janine said with a smile. "How long are you planning to stay, Kathy? Did you have a good trip?"

"The trip was fine," Kathy replied. "We had no delays. I thought I'd stay maybe two weeks. Jay is supposed to drive down and pick up a car then. I thought I'd go back with him to Chelmsford for a week or so."

Janine looked at Riordan questioningly.

"There's a women's boarding house connected with the facility Jay works at. Kathy can stay there. She'll be well chaperoned."

"Oh, then you'll have a lovely time," Janine said. "Do you have any idea of what you'd like to see while you're here in London?"

"Perhaps some of the formal gardens, art galleries and maybe the natural history museum, mostly standard tourist fare and I wanted to visit with you of course," Kathy said. She was smiling in excitement of being in London with Riordan and Janine.

"You're so different than Riordan's other sister," Janine said. "He didn't stop gripping for a week after she left last time."

"She's a damn pest," Riordan said.

"Riordan, language! Let's go up and get you settled," Janine said. "Then I can show you around. Where you ever here before?"

"When I was seven," Kathy replied. "I barely remember being here. I do remember Riordan had an old soapbox car and him pushing me around in it though."

"I wasn't here. I was already at Oxford or up at Downton. It must have been Jay or Da."

"That's funny," Kathy said. "I always thought it was you. I remember this older boy kissing me on the cheek and telling me he would buy me a real car when I grew up. It must have been your father. It was silly really."

"If it had to do with cars it was probably their father," Janine said. "The one we have now is frivolous in the extreme. I'll be quite happy if Jay comes and gets it and drops off one of his that is more practical."

They had entered a bedroom with a huge double bed. The furnishing hadn't changed since Riordan's great grandmother's time.

"Oh my," Kathy said when she saw the bedroom. "It's so big."

"The house can be a bit much until you get used to it," Janine said. "Now let's go for a tour and find you a cup of tea."

Kathy had a good time with Janine and Riordan. London was in the process of reconstruction after the war and there was a great deal going on. Riordan had dug the bomb shelter out of the yard. The steel from the shelters was being collected for recycling. There were still a great deal of rationing going on and Janine needed the garden put to rights as soon as possible so it would be ready for next summer's garden.

"Just look at the mess in the back garden," she told Kathy. "Riordan took out the bomb shelter, now it looks like a bomb actually landed in the yard."

"You still have some nice plants. They just need a bit of tending and perhaps replanting," Kathy said. "Would you like me to do some sketches? I could do a few designs for the garden. You might like one of them."

"That would be very helpful," Janine replied. "If you could come up with some ideas. I'm afraid I'm a bit of a dunce at it and so is Riordan. The downstairs lodgers used to like to come out here, but no one does really now that it is such a mess."

Kathy had gotten out her art supplies and borrowed a measuring tape from Riordan. Within a few days she had three sketches for them to pick from. Some of the designs incorporated rubble from the demolished buildings to be used as planters.

"If you can't get rubble, you could use stone," Kathy explained. "At home you can pick it up by the cart load. I don't know here. I thought you could substitute old rubble or brick."

Riordan and Janine had finally picked one of the designs Kathy had created and set about making plans to put it into reality.

"You're incredibly talented," Riordan told Kathy. "You really should think about going to university."

"I just don't know, Riordan," Kathy told him. "I like drawing, but I like plants too and I like design and some mathematics. I'd like to do something that incorporates it all, but I don't know what that is."

"I wish I had the time to take you up to Oxford and show you around," Riordan said. "You might get some ideas. My work is just too hectic. I have trouble getting the time off that I do. Another year and I'll have a promotion. Hopefully things will slow down a bit once that happens. I'll talk to Jay about taking you when he comes down on the weekend."

"I didn't know Jay was coming," Kathy replied happily.

"He telephoned today. His cricket team has a match in London on Sunday. He'll be down Saturday. What are you planning to do tomorrow?"

"I was going to take Kathy around to Kew Garden," Janine said. "Then we'll go shopping for a few things we need for the new garden."

Kathy was having a marvelous time with Janine. She was free to explore her own interests and she was getting more and more ideas from the gardens and art galleries she was visiting. There was an article in the paper on the return of a large art collection to one of the London galleries and Kathy was dying to see it. When she went to the art gallery, she was surprised by the large collection of nudes on display. It had never occurred to her to draw the human form. She purchased a book from the shop on drawing nudes to add to her collection on art.

When Jay showed up on Saturday he was very impressed with the work that had been done already on the back garden and Kathy's design. She was beaming as she showed him the sketches and explained her plan for the garden.

"I'd like Kathy to visit Oxford and get some ideas for her future education," Riordan told Jay. "I just don't have time to take her. I was wondering if you could do it."

"What's wrong with Cambridge?" Jay retorted. It was an ongoing good-natured rivalry between the two of them.

"Nothing. Take her to both if you like. She has talent. It's as plain as the nose on your face. She needs to find a venue for it," Riordan replied.

"I would like to see both universities," Kathy said. "Only if you have time to take me though. I don't want to be a bother."

"It's no bother," Jay replied. "One of the best things about my line of work is I have a much higher fuel ration. We can go by car. It's a nice drive to both places. There is a lot to see along the way. I'll make some arrangements and let you know."

"Are we going in your father's car?" Kathy asked. She didn't know much about cars but even to her it looked terribly old and out of date.

"No," Jay laughed. "I'm keeping it because it was my father's. It's almost twenty years old. I have a newer one at my place. I just brought this one down for Janine and Riordan. It's larger for the family."

"How many cars do you have?" Kathy asked him quizzically.

"A couple. It's a passion I inherited from my father," Jay replied.

Sunday morning Jay and Kathy headed off to mass together. The family went to watch his match in the afternoon. Kathy was entranced with Jay. He was in some ways so totally Irish and in others the perfect English gentlemen.

"Would you like to go out with me tonight?" he asked her. "I can leave early in the morning."

"It's Sunday. I didn't think many places would be open," Kathy replied.

"I have something special in mind," Jay said. "Wear something warm."

Jay drove them across the city as it was getting dark and parked near the waterfront.

"Jay, where are we going?" Kathy said. It was cool and a little scary being at the docks in the dark. She had heard all sorts of stories about nefarious characters hanging around the docks after dark."

"I trusted you in Ireland. Now you have to trust me," Jay said. He took her hand and lead her to a small boat. He paid the boat handler and took her to sit near the front of the boat.

"Everyone should see London by the Thames at night at least once in their life," he said. He put his arm around her and pulled her close. As the boat traveled along the Thames, he pointed out the historic landmarks. Kathy had to admit it was a beautiful trip along the river. His explanations added to the experience and she loved to listen to his rich voice. He kissed he as they passed under every bridge. There were a great many bridges and Kathy suspected it was more of a ploy to get a kiss than any real tradition, but she didn't mind one bit. The boat returned to the dock an hour and a half later. Kathy was happy to get back inside the car. The boat ride had been beautiful but she was freezing. They went to a pub for a late meal, before they returned to the house. Riordan and Janine were still up when they got back.

"Where did you go?" Janine asked.

"Jay took me for a boat ride on the Thames," Kathy said. "It was beautiful, but a bit cold. We went out for something to eat afterwards."

"That sounds rather romantic," Janine said. "It wouldn't hurt you to get a romantic notion once in a while, Riordan."

"I'm perfectly romantic. Besides I haven't got my inheritance yet. Once I do I'll take you on all the boat rides you like," Riordan replied.

"I'll be an old lady by then," Janine said.

"I could watch the children while I'm here," Kathy volunteered. "You two could go out in the evenings. I don't mind at all."

"We can't ask you to do that," Riordan said.

"Why not? I watch Collin all the time for Auntie and Da. Besides I like to work on my drawings in the evenings once the children are in bed," Kathy said.

"We'll have to take you up on that," Riordan replied. "As long as you're sure we're not imposing."

"You're not imposing and I don't mind one bit. Oh, Jay, I got a new art book I wanted to show you this week. I'll go get it."

By the time Kathy returned with her book Janine and Riordan were heading to bed.

"Goodnight you two, don't stay up too long," Riordan said.

"Yes, Da," Jay quipped.

"Goodnight," Kathy said.

She showed Jay the book she had purchased.

"I've never thought of drawing people," she said.

"I thought you liked flowers and gardens."

"I do. It's just something different. You see at first you start with body parts and then you work up to doing the entire body. The book says it's best with a model. I have no idea where I'll get one. Da gets flustered even if he forgets to do up his buttons. He even wears an undershirt to go swimming."

Jay laughed.

"You have a predicament there. I'll tell you what. You can draw all of my body parts you like as long as it's not the full deal. All right? Maybe you can sucker Riordan into an arm or leg."

Kathy laughed. "You make it sound like an ordeal."

"It looks like it would be as bad as posing for a picture only worse. You know how much I dislike having my picture taken."

"You know the drawings might not look anything like you at first. I've never drawn a person before."

"When I take you up to Oxford, we'll make a weekend of it. You can sketch me all you like then. Does that work?"

"You are the best," Kathy said wrapping her arms around him and hugging him.

"Don't forget it," Jay said with a smile before he kissed her.

Kathy was having such a good time in London she wrote to her father to say she had decided to extend her visit another two weeks with Riordan and Janine to see the garden design through. She worked on the yard a few hours every day as did Janine. Some evenings the lodgers would lend a hand. Riordan did most of the heavy work if he was home early enough and not exhausted from the day. By the end of the third week the garden was starting to take shape nicely.

"It looks so much better already," Janine said.

Kathy had created a geometric garden shape the surrounded vegetable plots with flowers. The roses had been replanted to create a focal point around a statue in the middle. There was even a trellised area where people could sit. The following summer grapes would be planted to create shade and provide another food source at the same time. The most unique feature was a rain water system that diverted water from the gutters into a system of small waterfalls that would run when it was raining and provide water to different areas of the garden.

"It's absolutely lovely, Kathy," Riordan assured her.

"I'm glad you're happy with it," Kathy said. "I've enjoyed working on it so much."

Kathy had been working on her figure drawing. She had done multiple drawings of hands, arms and legs enlisting anyone in the house who would sit long enough for her to draw an appendage. Once she had one body part perfected she moved on to another. She had pages and pages of noses, eyes, ears and mouths. She did a drawing of each of Riordan and Janine's children. Janine declared they were good enough for framing and put them up in their bedroom.

Kathy was quite pleased with the relationship that had formed between herself and Riordan. They had never spent a great deal of time together before. He was easy to get along with like Jay, but more formal. They were the most brother and sister of all her siblings. He looked out for her and she in turn did things for him. By the end of her time in London she was missing him already.

"Come back anytime you like," Riordan told her as he hugged her goodbye. "You have to come and check on your garden."

"You aren't going to call me a pest when I leave are you?" Kathy teased him.

"You're no pest," Riordan said laughing. "Just don't let that brother of mine lead you astray."

"Me? We have an entire weekend of visiting your old Alma Matte. How is that leading her astray?" Jay asked.

"You'll sabotage me and talk her into Cambridge," Riordan jibbed him back.

"Never mind them," Janine said. "Come back soon."

Jay and Kathy piled into his sportster and headed towards Oxford. Jay stopped along the way so Kathy could photograph different churches, castles and gardens and make sketches if she liked. She sat on a blanket and sketched one particularly elaborate church. Jay was lying on the blanket next to her watching her.

"I haven't forgot your promise to let me sketch you," she said. "I'm getting good at the bits and pieces, I need to work on drawing larger body parts now."

"So you're going to turn me into a live model? That will be one for the history books. World's crabbiest model, or maybe world's most disproportionate model," Jay teased.

"More like the world's handsomest," Kathy said as she leaned over and kissed him before she went back to her sketch.

"How long are you going to stay with me?" Jay asked her.

"First I'm not staying with you. I'm staying at a ladies rooming house in Chelmsford. I assume you booked us separate rooms for the weekend."

"Yes, besides all that. How long are you going to stay? Or do you want to go back to Ireland soon?"

"I'll stay until you run out of money or get fed up with me, whichever comes first."

"Then you'll be here all winter," he said.

"Jay, don't be ridiculous. I can't stay that long. I should go back in three weeks at the most. Da is already asking when I'm coming back. I'm hoping I'll get some ideas from these visits to the universities."

"If you stayed, I'd buy a house with a big yard and let you plant all the flowers you like."

"Jay, you're being silly. Stop teasing me."

He had a piece of grass and was brushing her neck with it. She swatted him away. "Maybe buying a big house with a yard was something he should do," he thought to himself. "Then again maybe he would go back to university and get a doctorate. Stop evading the topic," he scolded himself. "You've got a maximum of three weeks to get a proposal out. You better think of a good one."

He laid back and stared at the sky. He could design a tracking system for radar, but the one thing he couldn't do was think of a thing to say when he proposed. He looked a Kathy sitting on the grass beside him. She wasn't a thing like June. June had done the asking and he had just gone along with it. This time he wasn't getting off that easy.

* * *

Chapter Four

By the time they got to Oxford it was late afternoon. Jay checked them into their hotel before they went to dinner.

"Are you having a nice time?" he asked.

"Yes, but I'm worn out," Kathy said.

"Do you want to go to church in the morning. They have a chapel at Black Friar's Hall or do you want to sleep in?" Jay asked.

"We can go to church. I would like to see the Hall. I wish we were here longer, I would like to explore more and get some information on different courses," Kathy said.

"We can stay until Tuesday afternoon. I've been working late so I could get two days off. I should go back for Tuesday, but I can push it to Wednesday."

"I don't want you to jeopardize your work," Kathy said.

"You're not. We'll go to church in the morning and then we'll do whatever you like for Sunday. We can just relax, if that's what you want to do," Jay said.

"Can we decide tomorrow? I'm too tired to think about it," Kathy said.

"Fair enough," Jay replied. He left her at her door after he kissed her goodnight. He was a little tired himself after driving most of the day. He went to bed and tossed and turned. He had been watching Kathy all day. Her presence in the next room was all he could think about. He got up and took a cold shower before he went back to bed. The next three weeks he had a feeling it would be a cold shower on a daily basis, maybe two or three a day if he was going to keep his promise to Riordan. He went to sleep with his fingers crossed that she would forget his promise to let her sketch him. He was going to have to think about shoveling cow pies to keep from embarrassing himself. He groaned before he rolled on his stomach and bent his erection painfully. He pulled the pillow over his head. If this was being in love and honorable at the same time, it was for the birds.

The next day after church and lunch they walked around the town a bit and got themselves oriented.

"What do you want to do today?" Jay asked. They had already determined two of the universities at Oxford to visit and talk to the registrars about courses.

"I want to sketch you," Kathy said. "I'll photograph all the buildings I want to do water colors of. Once I'm back in Ireland I won't have a chance to sketch a live model."

"Oh, Kathy," Jay groaned. "Are you really going to make me do this?"

"Yes, it's not personal. It's art. Besides you can wear a sheet like they do in the book."

"What? I told you not all the way stripped down," Jay squeaked suddenly realizing what he'd opened his mouth and gotten himself into.

"What is the difference? We've been swimming so many times I can't even count. Did you bring your swim trunks? You could pose in them, I suppose."

"No, I didn't. Alright I give in."

"Good, I've been studying the book and I have a few ideas for poses. Let's go get started. We should buy some meat pies so we don't have to go out. I don't like to be disturbed once I start a sketch."

Jay groaned and went to a shop for two meat pies and a couple bottles of ale and cider. If he had to lie there or sit all afternoon he might as well relax.

Kathy showed him the pose she wanted to try first. She went into the washroom so he wouldn't be so embarrassed while he arranged a sheet over his lap. When she got back a few minutes later, she looked at him critically then readjusted the pose slightly.

"You do realize how embarrassing this is?" Jay said.

"I told you it's art," she said. "Try not to think about it."

She sat down and started to sketch. After half an hour she flipped the sheet of paper and started another one.

"I'm starting to cramp up," Jay complained a while later.

"Not too much longer and we'll try another," she said. When she was finally finished with her first sketches she closed her book. "You can move now. We'll take a break then try a few lying down. That might be easier."

Jay tried to move and found he had stiffened up from sitting in one place not moving for so long. He grabbed the sheet and pulled it around himself tight before he stood up.

"I think I need a drink," he said. He couldn't believe he had let himself get sucked into this. He got one of the bottles of ale and drank some before he let Kathy arrange his pose on the bed. "Come and join me," he said reaching up to pull her down onto the bed.

"Jay, stop it. It's all in the name of art."

"You don't think I'm interesting enough to lay on the bed with?" he asked. Trying to cover how exposed he was feeling. He felt ridiculous posing for sketches in the nude like some ancient Greek.

"You're more than interesting enough," Kathy replied. "I told you I don't like to be disturbed once I start to draw."

Jay was lying on the bed so long while she was drawing he fell asleep. He didn't wake up fully when he felt her push on him and reposition the sheet a bit. He flopped a different way and went right back to sleep. It was dark out when he felt Kathy shake his shoulder to wake him. He was lying on her bed with the sheet pulled up over him. At first he was a bit disoriented until he came fully awake.

"Did you finish the sketches?" he asked pushing himself up to sitting on his hands.

"Yes and you were the perfect model once you went to sleep," she said laughing softly.

"Are you going to show me them?" he asked.

"I'm a bit embarrassed," she said with a faint blush.

"You think, I'm not?" he said. "You can compare this to swim trunks all you like but I'm definitely not wearing any."

"We'll have something to eat first, then you can see them," Kathy said.

These were the most personal sketches she had ever done and she wasn't ready to share them with world. "It's Jay, not the world," she had to remind herself. She went and got the meat pies and the cider and brought them back to the bed.

"You're not going to let me get up are you?" Jay said.

"No, I quite like how you looked when you were asleep. I'm not ready to let go of the image yet," Kathy said looking down at the food in her hand where she was sitting cross-legged on the bed beside Jay. "It's the artistic temperament. It makes me want to savor an image. I know it's not how nice young ladies talk."

"You're the nicest girl I know," Jay said reaching over to run a finger along her jaw line. They stared into each other's eyes for a few seconds before he reached for his meat pie. It would be so easy to seduce her right then and there. At least he thought it would. He was wrestling with his conscience. This was his Kathy. He would kill any man who laid a finger on her. He had to treat her with respect and honor the promises he had made.

When they finished their makeshift meal she washed her hands then brought her sketchbook for him to see the images. He was surprised how intimate it felt to see her interpretation of his body. Some were of him from the waist up. Others she had gone back to while he was asleep and added watercolor to. He thought they were all very, very good. No one would ever know they were all a first attempt.

"You did a lovely job," he said as he handed the book back to her.

"Thank you," she said hugging the book to her. "I'll never forget today. You and Riordan have been so supportive of my interests."

"I don't think Riordan would have gone to this extreme," Jay said.

"No, you're very special," Kathy said as she leaned over and kissed him.

Jay reached up and ran a hand into her hair. His other arm went around her. He felt her put her sketchbook to the side as she let her weight drop onto him a bit. He was resting against the headboard of the bed and she was lying slightly across his chest. He looked at her and smiled for a moment before he went back to kissing her. He ran his lips down her throat to the v of her blouse. He kissed his way back up to her mouth. He trailed the fingers of the one hand that wasn't wrapped around her along the neckline of her blouse, sliding his fingers under the edge to caress her flesh. He slid the buttons of her blouse open then reached around her back to undo her bra, all the while plundering her mouth with his.

Kathy was lost in the sensation of his kiss. She had wanted to touch him multiple times that afternoon while she sketched him. When he was sleeping it was all she could do not to pull the sheet back and peek at what was lying underneath. She couldn't believe his kindness in allowing her to draw him. No other man she knew would have allowed her that kind of liberty. When he touched the flesh of her chest and slid his fingers along the tops of her breasts she felt herself yearning for more. She suddenly became aware of the sensation of her bra coming undone. Her eyes flew open and she sat up suddenly bonking Jay in the nose with her head.

"Ouch," he said, holding his nose.

"Jay what do you think you're doing," she said pulling her blouse shut in front.

"It's alright. I wasn't going to do anything more than kiss you."

"Taking my top off is a little more than kissing," she said.

"It's just a little more advanced type of kissing is all," he said. "I thought you liked kissing me."

"I do. I adore it. It's just…Anything more is wrong unless it's the man your going to marry," Kathy finally said. She was trying to button up her blouse and failing miserably with her bra all crooked.

"What if I am the man you're going to marry?" he said suddenly serious.

"You always talk in riddles, when I'm being serious," Kathy said.

"Go get dressed in the bathroom and give me a minute to get my cloths on," Jay said with a sigh. "We need to talk things out a bit."

Kathy nodded and headed for the washroom. Jay got up once the door closed and got dressed. He needed to propose to her. He best do it tonight, but he wasn't going to do it in a hotel room. He had to think of something quick.

He held Kathy's coat for her when she came out of the bathroom. He took her hand and locked the door to the room as they left handing her the key. He hadn't said a word. Kathy was looking at him hoping against hope he wasn't angry with her. He led her out of the hotel to a large green across the street. The street was quiet at this hour of the evening. It was a pretty scene with the square surrounded by old buildings and the street lights illuminating the square with soft light.

When he got to the square, he turned to her and knelt down on one knee.

"Kathy, we've known each other for a long time now. I care for you more than as a sister, more than as a friend. I love you and want to ask you to be my wife." Jay had planned something else to say but it was eluding him at the moment. He opened his mouth to say something else, then closed it again. "I…I…I haven't looked at another girl since you were thirteen years old," he finally blurted. "I'll stay true to you to my dying day. I'll do everything in my power to make you happy. Please say you'll have me."

Kathy was so shocked she was speechless for a moment.

"I didn't mean for you to propose to me so you could kiss me," she finally said.

"Is this what you think this is about?" Jay said standing up quickly. His feelings were smarting. He knew he hadn't said things as elegantly as he would have liked but had thought she would say yes.

"I don't know," she said quietly.

"I've been trying to ask you ever since you came to visit. I'm not good with expressing how I feel. I have my father's gift for all things mechanical. I lack his gift for the turn of a phrase," Jay said he couldn't look at her.

"Jay, look at me," she said putting a hand on his arm. "Just look at me."

He turned to look at her. The tears were running down her cheeks. "I love you Jay. I've loved you for a long time. Of course I'll have you. You phrase things beautifully, it's your timing that could use a little work," she said smiling through her tears.

He pulled her against him into an embrace.

"Why are you crying?" he said.

"I'm crying because I'm engaged to someone as wonderful as you."

"If you marry me you'll have to go to Cambridge," he said. "They don't have a Ph.D. program here."

"What in the devil are you talking about?" Kathy said laughing.

"I've been thinking about getting my doctorate. If you want to go to school we could go at the same time."

"You are the silliest man," Kathy said. "I don't even know what I want to study."

"We'll figure it out in the next couple weeks."

They turned to head back to their hotel with their arms around each other.

"Kathy, if you're going to sketch me in the nude, can you take your cloths off too? I feel ridiculous being the only one undressed in the room."

"Jay, it's art."

"Still would you?"

"I'll consider it."

"I'll let you sketch me without the sheet if you do," he coaxed.

"Jay are you a bad boy? The type my father is always warning me about?"

"I'm the type of man who has been waiting for four years for you to grow up. I'm not a boy."

"No, you're definitely not," she said.

* * *

Chapter Five

They returned to the hotel and sat up making plans about when to tell their parents and how they wanted to go about it.

"We'll tell them when I take you back," Jay said. "If you want to wait until the wedding night then that is what we'll do."

"I'm not sure about that part," Kathy told him with her head resting on his shoulder. "I've never done anything with anyone else. You're the only one I've ever kissed. It's all a little frightening."

"We'll ease into things, alright? I promised to bring you home to Ireland safe and I promised Riordan I wouldn't do anything more than kiss you. He's very protective of you," Jay said.

Kathy nodded shyly against him.

"It's silly isn't it? I can draw you without a stitch on, but I get nervous the second anything else comes up."

"It's art. It's completely different," Jay said as he stood up to leave.

"Where are you going?"

"For another cold shower. This makes my second one today."

"You don't need to use cold water. There is lots of hot water in my bathroom."

"If I'm going to keep my hands off you, it needs to be cold."

"Oh," Kathy said finally getting the drift of what he was talking about.

He kissed her before he left for the night.

Kathy sat on her bed and opened her sketchbook. She savored every line of Jay's face. She adored him from the cleft in his chin to the way he had of saying the right thing at the wrong time. Her father was going to flip. She just hoped Auntie would understand.

The next day they visited two of the university registrars and collected course catalogues. One of the registrars suggested Kathy look into architecture.

"It would combine your interests of art, design and mathematics," he had said.

"Thank you for your suggestion," Kathy replied.

They wandered around until Kathy had taken all of the pictures she wanted.

"What do you think of architecture?" Jay asked her as they drove out of Oxford toward Chelmsford.

"It doesn't include plants. It's close though."

"What about illustrating botanical books?" Jay suggested.

"It's a bit lacking," Kathy said. "The right one is out there somewhere I just know it."

"We'll head up to Cambridge next weekend or better yet I'll see what I can arrange so we can go through the week. I might have to work fairly solid and through the weekend though to get the time."

"I can amuse myself with drawing."

"I'll have to buy you another sketch book. You'll have that one filled up before you get back to Ireland. What do you want to do this afternoon? We have the rest of the day free."

"Exactly what we did yesterday. Sketch you."

Jay thought about it.

"Alright, new rules though. We can be back to my flat in an hour and a half. Tomorrow we go buy you a ring."

"I thought you needed to work."

"I do. We'll go ring shopping in the morning. I'll give you a key to my place so you can work undisturbed. I'll probably work late."

"Jay. I don't want to stay at a woman's boarding house. I want to stay with you," Kathy said.

"Kathy," Jay let out a sigh. "There will be hell to pay if anyone finds out. Riordan will skin me alive."

"I'll sleep on the sofa."

"No, I'll sleep on the sofa until you want other arrangements. You'll find out what living with an engineer is really like. I get highly distracted at times."

"Like I did yesterday?"

"Something like that but worse."

"We are alike aren't we? We both get lost in what we are doing? I think it's the artistic temperament."

"It could be," Jay replied.

They arrived back at Jay's flat in record time. Jay hadn't been wasting any time on the road. He pulled into a garage with three bays all filled. Kathy recognized the older car that had belonged to his father at the far end.

"Are all these yours?" she asked him.

"Yes, I like to work on them when I have a problem to solve. It helps me think."

"So I'll always know where to find you when you're thinking something over."

"Most of the time. I'm exactly like my father in some respects. He did exactly the same thing."

"I'm going to have a long talk with your mother about your habits," Kathy said.

"If she's speaking to us," Jay replied.

"They'll come around."

"Riordan will. Our parents will take a while. My sister you might as well forget it. She still hasn't accepted our mother's marriage. She says she does to her face, but otherwise you might as well talk to a rock. My grandmother and aunts should be fine."

"Riordan called your sister a pest."

"An accurate description," Jay said quirking an eyebrow.

They went up to his flat that occupied the top floor of a house. It had large windows and let in good light. His drafting table was set up by one of the windows with his bed in the same room. There was a small kitchen as well as a sitting area. There were no distinct walls except for the door leading into the bathroom.

"You don't have any privacy," Kathy said when she saw his flat.

"I live alone, I don't need privacy. No one else has ever come here."

"Not even friends from work?"

"We go to a pub, same with the blokes from cricket. Are you hungry?"

"No. I'm feeling the creative drive. I want to sketch."

"You're sure? We could go ring shopping."

"Later," Kathy said as she walked over to him and started unbuttoning his shirt. She pushed the suspenders off his shoulders.

"Not so fast," he told her. "New rules."

Kathy was extremely apprehensive about this, but she did want to sketch him. She trusted him, but at the same time she felt tremendously vulnerable about what she was about to do.

He took her sweater off and laid it on the chair with his shirt then moved to the buttons of her blouse. She was looking up into his face as he undid her blouse and slid it off her arms. His hands moved to the clasp of her bra.

"Jay, I'm not so sure about this."

"If you want me nude. We get nude together. For the sake of art."

She nodded and let him finish what he was doing. He didn't move to touch her flesh as her bra dropped away. Jay proceeded to the buttons of her skirt. Her hands went to the clasp of his trousers. Then undid his drawers and pushed them down. She couldn't bring herself to look yet. Her hands were clasped shyly in front of her. Once they were both fully naked he took her hands and pulled them away from her body. He looked her up and down.

"You're incredibly beautiful," he said softly. "I don't feel so exposed now. How do you want me to pose? It will take a few minutes for my body to settle down."

She had him stand near the window where the light was good, moved his arms into the position she wanted and tipped his body slightly. As she began to think about the sketch and what she wanted to transfer onto the paper she forgot to feel self conscious about her own nudity.

"There, perfect," she still hadn't taken a conscious look at his privates. When she did she saw what she assumed was normal for a man. It was longer and larger than she would have guessed and sticking straight out from his body. She had only seen her little brother and Auntie did say it grew as men grew up. She finished the first sketch then had Jay stand in a different position so she could sketch him from the back. His erection had calmed down considerably. It wasn't so bad working without clothing on. It felt free somehow and once she was concentrating she didn't even notice it.

She told Jay when it was time for a break. He came over and looked at her first two sketches.

"You've improved already," he said. He placed a kiss on her temple.

"It's not like I'm ever going to show these to anyone else. Do you want to try?"

"Drawing myself?"

"No drawing me. I'll get you a soft pencil. It's easier."

"I'm not an artist. At least not at your level," he said.

"It's about feelings and impressions. Just let them flow onto the page," Kathy told him. She struck a pose for him. Jay wanted to walk over grab her and show her exactly what he could do to express himself. Instead he took the pencil and pad, looked at her and began to draw. He tried to just let the lines form on the page from his impression of her. He held out the book to her when he was done.

She looked at the image on the page. It was a fairly good likeness of her. He had done quite well without any prior practice.

"You should draw regularly, you could be quite good," she told him.

Jay was sitting on the bed looking out the window.

"How do you like the new rules?" he asked.

"This is going to sound strange," Kathy replied. "I like them quite a lot. I feel freer somehow. Like the constraints of society don't exist for us right now. We're equals in a neutral space. There is no artist and model. We're both doing this together. I would never do it with anyone else though."

"That's good," he said. Jay was starting to relax with the posing as well. He was feeling safer with her all the time and less exposed. He lay back on the bed, crossed his ankles and put his hands behind his head.

"Your posing is improving," Kathy told him as she started to sketch him again.

"Landscape architecture," Jay said suddenly.

"What's that?" Kathy said distractedly.

"Designing gardens. Much like designing buildings but it's for the outdoors. Sometimes it's putting trees and plants inside buildings. We could get some information when we go to Cambridge."

Kathy slowly set her materials down and walked over to the bed and sat down beside Jay.

"Do you want me to move?" he asked her.

"No," she said quietly. She reached out to take his hand. "I like you when you're like this. Just quiet."

"I'm completely at your mercy when I'm lying here. It does feel like we're sharing something more doesn't it? Being here like this sharing part of ourselves. I don't think anyone else would understand it. Do you want to come and see where I work tomorrow?"

Kathy nodded. "I'm sure I'll love it."

"It's rather dull," Jay said.

"You always say you're dull, but you're far from dull. Who else would consent to being my model and try to help me find something to study or come up with this unusual way to sketch?"

"I'm sure there are lots of men more interesting than me who would," Jay said.

"I think you're wrong. Jay can you show me more about kissing?"

He pulled towards him and kissed her softly on the mouth. His fingers gently traced over her bare breasts. He slowly drew her closer to him and pulled a nipple into his mouth. Then just as slowly kissed her on the mouth again.

Kathy's heart was racing at feel of his lips on her bare skin.

"How are we going to keep kissing and touching separate from when we're doing art?" he said thoughtfully.

"I don't know," she said. "We'll just have to figure it out." Somehow any more physical intimacy would intrude on what they were sharing.

"Have you had enough of sketching today?" He asked as he took her hand and kissed her knuckles.

"Yes, I think I'm done for today. Thank you for sharing this time with me. It was very special," she said looking into his eyes.

"I said we would ease into things and I meant it. I really did feel exposed and vulnerable being the only one undressed. You can sketch me anytime you please, just on equal footing. Let's go shopping. We need something for dinner."

"Sometimes you are a contradiction in terms," Kathy said. After a few minutes she was dressed again. "It's no wonder we have always gotten on so well isn't it? We understand what the other needs and don't have to feel embarrassed about it. We both feel the need to create."

"We do. After dinner I'll show you a bit more about kissing."

"That would be nice," she said. "You never break your promises do you?"

"I promised Riordan I wouldn't do more than kiss you before you go back to Ireland."

"Then you won't, but there is nothing wrong with kissing is there?"

"Not a thing," Jay said with a wide smile as he took her hand and headed out the door.

* * *

Chapter Six

They had the radio on and ate dinner by candlelight. Both of them were looking forward to kissing each other later and exploring where it would go, but at the same time they were savoring the anticipation. They finished their meal and did the few dishes before Jay took her by the hand and lead her to an armchair in his sitting room area. The low light and music along with Jay's proximity were making her head swim. He gathered her into his arms and kissed her before he sat down and pulled her onto his lap.

Kathy snuggled down and laid her head against his shoulder as he played with her fingers. She could feel the hardness of his erection pressing into her, but this time it didn't alarm her.

Jay kissed her mouth deeply using his tongue to stroke every corner. He slid his lips across her cheek to nibble her ear before he moved his lips down her neck. Her hand had crept up to his neck and was tracing the lines of his throat, before her fingers stole inside his shirt to explore the feel of his shoulder and chest. Jay lifted his head and smiled at her slightly before he kissed her mouth again. Ever so slowly he moved his hand to cup her breast, then slid his thumb over the aroused tip. Kathy gasped at the sensation. He kept kissing her mouth and rubbing her breast through the fabric of her blouse until he felt her relax. Kathy felt the buttons of her blouse opening this time but didn't feel the fear. When Jay slipped his hand around her back and undid her bra she allowed herself to enjoy the sensation as his warm hand closed over the bare flesh of first one breast and then the other. She slid the buttons of his shirt open then moved slightly so she could run her lips down the side of his neck. As she shifted he let out a small groan as she slid her weight against his hardened penis.

"I didn't hurt you did I?" she asked him.

"No," he said in a strangled whisper. "Keep going it feels good."

He kissed her again with more passion and urgency than he had before. He could feel himself starting to loose control. He moved her body slightly and dipped his head to take her nipple into his mouth. He teased, sucked and licked the first one until Kathy was gasping and clinging to him before he turned his attention to the second. He was just about to forget every promise he had made to keep his hands off her and carry her to his bed when the phone stated ringing.

Jay threw back his head and groaned. Kathy got up and removed her bra, then put her blouse back on while he went to answer the phone. She could hear his side of the conversation he was having with Riordan.

"Yes, she had a good time in Oxford…Not much. We went to church, visited two of the schools, took pictures, Kathy did some sketches…of course we stayed in separate rooms…she did get one idea for a course of study. We'll look into it when we go to Cambridge…I don't know when. I'll make arrangements when I go into work tomorrow…Stop being such a mother hen, of course she is fine. I'll let you know when we can get to down to London. We've got some news…Nothing terrible. I might teach her to drive if we have the time…I'll call you tomorrow.

"That was Riordan checking up on us," Jay said. "He got a cable from your Da wanting to know when you are coming home."

Kathy had taken a seat on the arm of the chair they had been occupying earlier.

"I'm not ready to go back yet. There are still things I want to do and see."

"I know that. I'll make some arrangements tomorrow, then we can write and set his mind at ease," Jay said. He had sat back down in the armchair. He took her hand. There are so many things I want to show you and share with you. I hate to let you go back."

"We could get married soon. Then I would never have to leave you."

"We could do that too. Let's go to bed. I have to get up early if I'm going into work. You sleep in the bed. I promise I'll leave you alone."

Kathy went to get ready for bed. She came back and gave him a quick kiss goodnight before she crawled into bed and put the bedside light out. Jay went into the bathroom and took a quick shower. He didn't need cold water tonight. His brother had been more effective than any shower. He sighed. It was going to be a difficult next few weeks.

Jay couldn't have been happier over the next week. In order to take time off the following week he had to work through the weekend. Kathy was busy tidying up his flat and going out around the town taking pictures or filling up her sketchbook while he was at work. She had come to his work place and been fascinated with the aircraft and radar systems he was working on. Jay was currently working on a new radar system for commercial aviation. There were parts of the project he couldn't show her, but Kathy asked a myrid of questions about the things he was able to. He had come home one evening to find she had polished all of the chrome on his car collection. He shook his head and laughed. It was exactly what he would do if he was feeling upbeat about something. He had taken her to his cricket practice one evening and then out to the pub with the lads afterwards. She was shy and had clung to him, but he hadn't minded one bit.

Most evenings she had a meal waiting when he got home. There was a great deal of kissing and touching and exploring each other's bodies but they hadn't pushed beyond a certain point. Often she would sketch him in a variety of poses she had thought up through the day from visits to the art section at the library or galleries. They had gotten so used to their routine for sketching neither of them thought it in the least odd. She would give him a quick kiss before she would position him for the next pose. Two evenings before Jay had scheduled his time off he had brought work home. He was so lost in thought while he worked he hadn't really noticed Kathy unbuttoning his shirt and sliding it off. When she had undone the rest of his cloths, he had moved slightly to accommodate her, dropped a quick kiss on her mouth and gone back to work. He had only been conscious of a slight rustling as she removed her clothing. When he finally finished what he was doing, he looked over to see her fast asleep in bed. She had left her sketchbook open on the table. He looked at the series of sketches she had done of him while he was working. They were intensely personal and at the same time beautiful in the lines she had used to create his likeness. There were three sketches of him as he had shifted his weight and leaned a different way while working. It felt as though she had joined him and touched a part of him no one else ever had.

It was late and he was exhausted. He looked at the sofa, then disregarded it as he clicked out the lights and went to slide into bed beside Kathy. He realized once he was in bed that she was still naked. He closed his eyes and savored the instant. It was the most intensely personal moment of his life and he hadn't laid a finger on her.

The next morning Jay woke up to Kathy's arm lying across his chest and her curled towards him. The covers had slipped down to reveal her milky white breasts with their round pink tips. She was incredibly beautiful and vulnerable as she slept beside him. He moved slightly to turn off the alarm and lay back down for a few minutes.

"Jay, why aren't you on the sofa?" Kathy said as she opened her eyes.

"It was late, I was tired and I just wanted to go to sleep somewhere comfortable," he said. Kathy's hand was stroking his chest. He was getting excited. He knew he should get up and get ready for work, but he wanted to steal a few more minutes.

"I like watching you work," she said. "You're so intense."

"Like you when you draw, but worse," he said. He slid his arm around her and pulled her closer so her head was lying on his chest. "I wish I could lay here all day with you like this but I do have to go to work."

She placed a kiss on his chest. Then moved back from him slightly. Jay sat up on the side of the bed then leaned back to kiss her on the hair.

"I really don't want to go," he mumbled. "If you don't put some cloths on I'll never get out of here."

"Jay, go shave your whiskers are rough. I'll make you some breakfast," Kathy said pushing on his shoulder.

"How can I resist an offer like that," he said as he headed to the washroom for yet another cold shower.

They spent Jay's four day weekend going to Cambridge and talking to the faculty advisor then going to talk with one of the professors of Landscape Architecture. Once Kathy had an idea of the variety of applications for the field and the range of subjects she would have to take she was satisfied with her visit. Jay took her to meet some of the people he had worked with during the war at Cambridge and showed her some of his favorite haunts. Once they had finished up there they headed back into London to see Riordan and Janine and give them the news of their engagement.

"I'm hoping this goes well," Jay told her. "Riordan had me figured out before we got to Ireland. He usually reads me like a book."

"Did you tell him I'm staying with you at the flat?" Kathy asked.

"No, and I'm not planning to. He's like a giant mother hen."

Janine was happy when they arrived and wanted to show Kathy how well the garden had come in since she had last seen it. It was already into October but the plants had recovered from the shock of replanting and the garden was looking good for the following summer.

"I've had three inquiries already of people who want you to take a look at their gardens," Janine told Kathy. "You could make a tidy amount next spring doing designs for gardens and helping people get their yards back in order."

"I would like that," Kathy replied. "I've never had a job. Da wouldn't let me at home. We found all kinds of information about Landscape Architecture at Cambridge. I think it's what I want to study."

"At least it's more useful than my degree," Janine said. "We decided to have a family right away so I've never gone to work."

Riordan and Jay looked a like they were having an argument when the women went to rejoin them.

"What are you two discussing?" Janine asked. "Whatever it is it doesn't look promising."

"We were just discussing Kathy's return trip to Ireland and her accommodations in Chelmsford. Jay wants her to stay longer, but I think she should go back in another week or so," Riordan said.

"Why the rush?" Jay retorted.

"You're not the one who did the inviting, so you're not the one that is going to get the flack if they find out about Kathy living with you. The longer she stays the more likely they will find out," Riordan said. "Besides you're just avoiding an argument."

"Why are you living with Jay and what argument?" Janine asked.

Kathy had moved beside Jay and reached for his hand.

"I didn't want to be apart from Jay. Nothings happened," Kathy said quickly looking at Jay for reassurance. "The argument will come when we tell our parents we are engaged," He smiled at her and squeezed her hand.

"I knew you were interested in each other, but I didn't know it was this serious," Janine said. "How long ago did you get engaged?"

"Oxford," Jay replied. "Almost two weeks ago now."

"Well, I for one am thrilled," Janine said. "Aren't you happy Riordan?"

"I am, but I concerned what Mum and Rory are going to say and I think you're being irresponsible staying together, but I can't stop you. I don't want to see Kathy throw away her chances for an education either."

"She'll apply to Cambridge for next fall. I'm planning to do my Doctorate anyway," Jay said. "I can get mine funded through work and I can afford Kathy's education. It will all work out."

"Jay, Janine might have found a few jobs for me next spring here in London," Kathy said. "Designing gardens, just small ones. I'd like to pay my own tuition."

"If you're able, I don't mind. Otherwise I'll pay for it," Jay told her.

"Well, congratulations are in order. Let's have a drink to celebrate," Riordan said. "But you do need to go home for a bit Kathy. Give them time to digest this."

"I'll fly her back next week," Jay said finally giving in to Riordan's insistence that Kathy return to Ireland.

"Jay, no. That's too expensive," Kathy exclaimed.

"I can't take more time off," Jay said. "It's fast and I can afford it."

"Jay you can't just spend money like that. First you want to pay for my education, then you want to take a plane to Ireland."

"How much do you think he makes?" Riordan asked Kathy quizzically. He had a sardonic grin on his face.

"I don't know. Maybe six hundred pounds a year, like most people," Kathy answered.

"You my dear baby step sister are priceless," Riordan said with a chuckle.

"I don't understand," Kathy said.

"Kathy I make considerably more than that," Jay said. "A lot more. Multiply it by five. It's part of why I've always had so much trouble trusting people. Most people want something, except you."

"But Jay," Kathy said still somewhat bewildered. "What would we possibly do with that much money?"

"Fly you home to Ireland for starters," Jay replied putting his arms around her and hugging her tight in front of his brother and sister-in-law.

"Jay, you should have told me," were the first words out of Kathy's mouth when they headed back to Chelmsford.

"Would it have made any difference?" Jay asked her.

"I don't know," Kathy said.

"Kathy you love me, don't you?" Jay asked her.

"Of course I do," she replied.

"Then money or no what is the difference?"

"I've never seen myself as married to a wealthy man," Kathy said twisting her hands slightly.

"I'm still the same person. The one you like to sketch and pester with questions."

"You forgot the most important one," she said blushing slightly. They had taken the train to London and were in a coach by themselves. She leaned close to whisper in his ear. "You're the person I like to kiss."

"Wait until I get you home," he whispered back. They're forays into kissing had gotten bolder, but Jay had stuck to his word. He was still bound by his promise to do nothing more than kiss her during her visit. They had another week together before he would get her back to Ireland. It would be at least Christmas time before he would be able to get time off again. He wanted her with every fiber of his being, but he also wanted their first time together to be her choice.

When they entered the flat that evening they were both aware of their limited time together before they needed to head back to Ireland. Kathy headed into the bathroom to take a bath while Jay switched the radio on and caught up on some of his correspondence. When Kathy came out of the bathroom she was toweling her hair dry and wearing his robe. She came over to see what he was doing.

"It seems such a short time and we'll be heading back. I hate to go," she said.

"Riordan is right, we do need to give our parents time to get used to things," Jay said. He had turned towards her and taken her hands. He stood up slowly and placed his lips against hers. He kissed her slowly at first then deepened the kiss until they were both clinging to each other. The pulled apart slightly and looked at each other until they came together in a second long kiss. His hands went to his clothes as did hers to start pulling them off. There was a steady trail across the room as they headed for the bed. Once he had lost the last of his clothing, he untied the robe and slid his hands inside. Kathy gasped slightly as their skin touched so completely and his erection pressed against her abdomen. They had never gone this far before but she didn't want to stop.

Jay slid his hands around behind her and pressed her into him tighter. His hands roamed over her body restlessly. His mouth went from her neck to one breast as his hand cupped it and brought it to his mouth. Kathy's head fell back reveling in the sensation. Jay returned to kissing her mouth before he pushed the robe off and they moved to lying on the bed. His mouth left hers to travel to her legs and kiss a trail up to her thighs. He slowly worked his way up her abdomen to one breast and then the other before he went back to kissing her mouth.

Kathy was twisting and squirming wanting to touch him more and more. Her hands were going wild raking over his back and chest. She trailed kisses down the side of his neck as he kissed her cheeks and the corners of her eyes. He encouraged her to roll over and kissed a trail down her spine until she quickly rolled back and pulled him close to her for a kiss on the lips yet again.

Jay's hand moved lower until he slid a finger into the juncture of her thighs. She opened her eyes in alarm and froze.

"Just relax Kathy we won't go all the way, just some touching," he said quietly. "It won't hurt. Tell me if it does."

She nodded sliding her arms around his shoulders again and willing herself to relax. He kissed her deeply while his finger rubbed her with slow circles. She found herself relaxing more and more as he legs moved wider apart to allow him access. He stopped his ministrations for a minute to guide her hand to his erection and encouraged her to stroke him. She did so tentatively at first then with a little more confidence as her fingers explored the flesh she had sketched so many times. He stroked her with slow lazy strokes while he kissed her breasts just a slowly. Every time his fingers would move over a particularly sensitive spot her body would shudder involuntarily. His erection was growing harder and firmer than ever under her ministrations. Beads of moisture were forming at the tip and making the head smooth as she rubbed it fully.

Kathy was groaning at the back of her throat with the sensations Jay was giving her. His mouth was on hers drinking in the sounds with his tongue making slow circles in her mouth and stroking hers. Jay slowly went back to kissing her breasts and slowed his ministrations to her privates to a point it was driving her into a frenzy. His finger found a particularly sensitive spot that made Kathy cry out. He placed the rest of his fingers of his hand against her and allowed her to move against them as her release came. He pushed the hair back from her face and smiled at her before he dropped his mouth to hers again. She refocused her attention on his still hard penis and stroked it fully.

"A little harder," he whispered against her lips.

She did as he had requested and in a few minutes his eyes were tightly shut as his mouth dropped open. He groaned and fondled her as his release came. The milky white of his release landed in a sticky pool on her abdomen. She looked at it with her nose wrinkled slightly.

"Stay put," Jay said to her he placed a small kiss on her mouth then went to get a cloth and wipe up the mess. He lay back down beside her and pulled her close so her head was on his chest.

"Is this kind of kissing to your liking," he asked her quietly.

Kathy was overcome with a sudden wave of shyness and nodded against his chest.

"All except that last bit," she said quietly.

Jay chuckled.

"I'll try not to make such a mess next time," he replied in a whisper.

Finally he coaxed her to get under the covers. He switched off the lights and turned off the radio before he climbed back into bed beside her and pulled her into his arms.

"Goodnight, my love," he said.

"Goodnight, Jay," Kathy paused for a second. "I love you."

"I love you as well," he said as he dozed off to sleep.

* * *

Chapter Seven

The next day Jay came back from work looking frayed.

"I have to go to Scotland to the test facility," he said. "We have to fly to Ireland tonight. I have to leave straight away to go to Scotland from there. I'm sorry Kathy. I wanted to spend this time together and show you a good time."

"Jay, don't be sorry. You have to work. I understand," Kathy said placing a hand on his arm.

He pulled her into an embrace.

"You're the only girl for me," he said.

"I'm going to miss you something horrible," Kathy said.

"I'll come over when I can. We'll write. The time will be gone in a flash and you'll be my wife."

"Or locked away in a tower like Rapunzel," she said with a laugh. Once they were packed up and had dinner, they loaded the car and headed for the airport. Kathy was nervous about her first flight but Jay was unconcerned.

"Merilee has been doing this for a job for years. For all that she's a pain in the neck she is a good pilot. I've done this plenty of times. Don't worry."

Kathy clung to Jay's hand for the entire flight. They made their way straight to the train station and took the evening train to Listowel. They were both quiet on the train dreading the confrontation that was sure to come. It was close to midnight by the time they made it to the house.

"It seems strange to be back," Kathy said.

"All will be well," Jay reassured her.

They went into the house to find Rory still up reading.

"Kathy, Jay, we weren't expecting you until the weekend," Rory said. Kathy went over and kissed her father.

"I have an unexpected trip to Scotland. I'll be up there at least a week, so I brought Kathy back straight away rather than leave her alone or take her back to Riordan's."

"Did you have a good time?" Rory asked.

"Yes, Da, I had a splendid time. I saw all kinds of things and we visited Oxford and Cambridge. I helped Janine with her garden. It was wonderful."

"Is Mum up?" Jay inquired.

"She's up with Collin. He won't settle down tonight. I think he's getting a cold. Run up and let her know you're here."

Jay nodded and went to find his mother. It wasn't long and she was back down to the sitting room with Collin in tow.

"Kathy, you're looking happy," Sybil said.

"I am," Kathy replied. She moved over to stand beside Jay.

"You both know that technically Jay and I are not blood relations," Kathy began.

"What difference does that make?" her father said. "He's still your brother."

"It makes a lot of difference," Jay said. "We've decided to get married."

His mother gasped. Kathy's father had a look of stunned disbelief on his face.

"You can't be serious," Rory said.

"We're very serious, Da," Kathy said. "We'd like to get married after the first of the year whenever Jay can get time off."

"What kind of juvenile fantasy is this? You take my daughter off for a few weeks, fill her head with romantic nonsense and expect us to accept this?" Rory said.

"It's not a fantasy," Jay replied calmly. I've been in love with Kathy for over a year. I didn't fill her head with any nonsense. I've asked to marry me and she's accepted."

"Kathy, Jay, have you thought things through?" Sybil asked. "Kathy you haven't even decided what you want to do with your life."

"But I have Auntie," Kathy said. "I want to study Landscape Architecture. We went to the university and made inquiries. I have all the information. Jay wants me to go to school."

Jay nodded.

"We have that part figured out already," he said. "Kathy's been exploring her interest in art. I've been encouraging her. So has Riordan. She is thinking things through."

"Are you doing what Jay wants or what you want?" Rory said. "Have you been using seduction to get my daughter to do whatever takes your fancy? I trusted you to take care of her."

"I haven't seduced her," Jay replied getting annoyed. "I have been taking care of her and treating her as an adult on equal footing."

"It's not very equal when you control all the purse strings and every aspect of her time with you. How long has this been going on? Have you two been running around behind our backs all these years?" Rory snapped.

"Now see here," Jay said, his voice rising.

"Tom, stop it this instant," Sybil said. "Getting angry won't solve anything. You'll never get around my father…Kathy's father this way."

"Mum, I'm Jay, not Tom," Jay said the anger suddenly going out of him.

"Jay, I'm sorry. What did I say?" Sybil said obviously upset.

"Jay said he's just like his father in many ways," Kathy said. "You've gotten them mixed up."

"Sit down and give us a calm explanation of events. Help us understand," Sybil said. "You are like your father Jay. He would get some notion in his head and there was no dissuading him. You're like your father too, Kathy. Entirely too kind hearted. It makes you vulnerable. You must understand your father is worried about you."

"First we haven't been running around behind everyone's backs," Jay said once they were seated. "We've always got on well. Over the last year or so we both realized it was more. We've admitted how we feel and I've asked Kathy to marry me. I wouldn't jeopardize her happiness."

"You expect us to believe you've kept your hands to yourself all these years?" Rory questioned.

"I do, because it's the truth," Jay said. "Until a few weeks ago I hadn't kissed her."

"And now?"

"I'm not ruined Da," Kathy was getting embarrassed.

"Thank God for that," her father muttered. "What are your plans? You seem to have something in mind."

"I redesigned the back garden for Janine. It was an awful mess after they took the bomb shelter out," Kathy said. "Three of their friends want me to design their back gardens next spring and I don't have any training yet. Jay and I went to Cambridge. I'm going to apply to take Landscape Architecture. Jay is going to do his doctorate at the same time. We'll be married by then so we can live close to the university and Jay can travel when he has to. I've been studying more art while I was in England too and working on my drawing. I'm getting much better and trying different subject matter."

"I think the two of you are mistaking sibling affection for something else," Sybil said not convinced.

"I have to agree with your mother," Rory said. "Kathy you've gone off to the city and got stars in your eyes. In a few months they'll wear off and you'll realize this is just an infatuation."

"No Da, I've loved Jay for a long time."

"You've loved him as a child," her father said. "You're not grown up yet."

"Da, I love Riordan and Collin as brothers. I love Jay as the man I'm going to marry. Most girls have already left home by my age. Please give us your blessing."

"I will give you my blessing as long as you wait until your eighteenth birthday. If you both still feel the same way then I will give my consent. Jay, I've known you all your life. You are decent and hard working but in this case I think you are lonely and mistaking a young girls' infatuation for the real thing."

"Fair enough," Jay said putting his hand out for Rory to shake. "We can wait. Can't we Kathy?"

Kathy nodded. "I turn eighteen at the end of February. We'll wait until then. We were planning on getting married in January. One more month won't make a difference."

Rory finally took Jay's hand. "If I find out you've ruined her, I'll cut your nuts off," he said quietly so only Jay could hear.

"She's not. I swear."

"Good enough then," Rory said.

The next morning Jay was up at dawn to catch the early train. Kathy walked to the station with him.

"Goodbye, love. I'll write. I'll let you know when I can come back. I'm going to miss you." He pulled her into an embrace. "I'll especially miss our sketching sessions," he whispered quietly so only she could hear.

Kathy walked back wiping the tears from her cheeks. When she got back to the house she got her sketchbook out that had her collection of pictures of Jay and looked through them. She slid the book under her pillow before she went to start her day.

The days seemed lack luster to Kathy without Jay to keep her company. She filled out the application to Cambridge and sent it off and wrote to Jay every day. She had all of her pictures developed and worked on some watercolors of the different scenes she had photographed.

Collin had a bad cold and was taking a great deal of her attention but otherwise the days seemed to lack purpose. Once Collin was feeling better he was into her things as usual and it kept Kathy busy trying to keep up with him and keep him out of her art supplies. In late November just over a month after she'd returned home her father met her at the door one afternoon with her sketchbook in his hand.

"Kathy, I'd like a word with you alone," he said.

"What are you doing with my book, Da?" she asked blushing profusely. She was panicking slightly knowing what was on the pages and that her father wouldn't approve.

"You're little brother came downstairs with it. I was shocked by what I saw. I'd like an explanation," Rory said.

"First I'd like my book back," Kathy said.

Her father slowly handed her the book. She snatched it back and held it close to her chest, protecting her most precious possession.

"I'm waiting," her father said.

"I went to an art gallery in London. They had a collection of nudes. I bought a book on drawing the human form," Kathy paused and looked down. "At first I drew body parts, ears and noses and arms. Even Riordan and Janine posed for those. I wanted to draw full figures but I knew I wouldn't be able to here. You're so modest I wouldn't be able to get you to sit for me without a shirt. Jay offered to sit for me. At first we used a sheet. When we got more comfortable with it, he didn't."

"How long was this going on?" Rory asked her disapprovingly.

"Almost every day for two weeks," Kathy said not looking at her father. "It is a form of art. I wanted to try and Jay helped me."

"It sounds like he was helping himself to you, more than helping you with your art."

"He wasn't. We've told you nothing happened," Kathy said. "We were already engaged before he posed…naked."

"The fact that you're so embarrassed proves to me that you knew it was wrong."

"I'm embarrassed because I know how modest you are. I would have asked you if I thought you would have helped me. I don't show my drawings to anyone. It would embarrass Jay."

"My point precisely. Art is something that is shared not hidden away."

Kathy thought about it for a few minutes then opened her book to the series she had done of Jay when he was working. They were by far the best sketches she had done and at the same time the most personal. She went to sit beside her father on the sofa and showed him the drawings.

"These are some of my best I think."

Rory looked down at the book to see the images of his stepson. When he looked at them as art there was no denying Kathy had talent. He looked back at his little girl. The expression on her face was one of a woman in love.

"You're very talented," he said. "I just wish you'd chosen another way to express it."

"Will you pose for me Da?"

He blanched a little at her question.

"Not like that. I don't think I'd like my daughter seeing me in the buff."

Kathy sighed.

"You see. That's why Jay did it. He knows me so well. He knew I wanted to draw the male form. That's what the book called it. He'd do anything for me."

"Kathy where did you stay when you were in Chelmsford?" Rory asked her.

"I don't want to lie to you. I haven't before and I don't want to now. I stayed at Jay's flat."

"And you expect me to believe nothing happened."

"Things happened Da, just not what you think."

"I don't know what to think any more. I thought I knew you. Now I'm not so sure."

"Da, I'm still your little girl. I love Jay and I want to marry him."

"I still think you're enchanted by him and it will wear off."

"Then I've been enchanted by him for the last four years. I don't think it will ever wear off. Weren't you infatuated with Mummy for three years?"

"That was different."

"How? Jay is exactly the same age as you when you married my mother."

Rory sighed in defeat.

"After this I think you had best marry him and soon," Rory put an arm around his daughter and hugged her. He placed a kiss on the top of her hair. She was still his little girl. "You really want your old Da to pose for you?"

Kathy nodded against him.

"I'll consider it," he said with a sigh.

"You wouldn't believe what my daughter was up to with your son while she was in Chelmsford," Rory told Sybil that evening while they were alone.

"From the tone of your voice, it doesn't sound good," Sybil replied.

"She had him posing for her, so she could draw him."

"What's wrong with that?"

"In the nude. Now she wants me to pose for her."

Sybil stopped what she was doing and thought about it for a few minutes.

"I think you should. It might do you good."

"What! You're not upset?" Rory exclaimed.

"No. Jay is every bit as handsome as his father. They are engaged. If he was posing they weren't doing anything else."

"I thought you'd be upset."

"It is a bit disconcerting that we didn't realize anything was going on. They've always reminded me of Tom and I when we were courting, although we had to keep everything hidden. I didn't think it was that serious," Sybil turned to Rory. "You're every bit as handsome as Jay. She wants to draw men she trusts, not strangers. You're entirely too bashful. It might do you some good and it will keep her mind off Jay."

"What if Mrs. Shay were to find out? I'd be the laughing stock of the town."

"Pose for her on Mrs. Shay's day off. She's off tomorrow and so are you. You could do it then."

"Sybil," Rory said in exasperation. "You're no help."

"You're daughter might be a little shocked when she sees what you keep hidden," Sybil said with a small smile.

"From the look of those drawings, your son isn't exactly tiny," he thought about it for a few minutes. "This is going to be a withering experience."

Sybil told Kathy the next morning at breakfast her father would pose for her. Rory was scowling but nodded his consent.

"And he will do it without cloths," Sybil added.

"Oh Da, I never thought you would," Kathy said excitedly. "Thank you." She wrapped her arms around her father's neck and hugged him.

"Don't thank me yet," Rory said blushing. "I haven't managed to shuck off my kit in front of my daughter yet. It won't be an easy task."

"Don't worry. We'll start from the back, so you won't be so embarrassed. I'll draw you sitting. It will be easier than standing. You won't regret this and we'll use a sheet."

"I'm regretting it already. I'll only do this when Mrs. Shay isn't here and not a word of this in the village."

"I'll get everything set up. You'll see it isn't so bad," Kathy said.

After breakfast Kathy rushed off to set up a spot in the living room to draw her father. Sybil and Rory were cleaning up the dishes.

"What have you volunteered me for? I feel like I'm going to be sick," he said.

"I've seen hundreds of nudes in galleries. Try and be a little supportive of her interests," Sybil replied.

"I am when they involve flowers and scenery, but this is…unsettling."

They went to join Kathy in the living room. Three-year-old Collin was following her around as usual.

"I built a fire Da, so you won't get cold. I've brought a chair from the dining room. I thought you could sit like this." Kathy demonstrated the pose. "Collin leave my pencils alone. You get ready and I'll come back in a minute. Then we can get started."

"I don't want to do this," Rory whispered to Sybil once Kathy had left the room.

"Too bad. She is so excited you can't disappoint her now. It's the first time she hasn't been mooning over Jay since she's been back." Sybil was busy undoing the buttons of Rory's shirt. "Besides you'll make a lovely model. Maybe I'll have her do one of you for me."

"Alright, just keep Collin busy."

"You're a good father," Sybil said kissing him on the lips.

Rory finally got the rest of his clothes off and put them on a pile. He looked at the chair his daughter wanted him to pose on. This was the most embarrassing thing he'd ever done. He groaned as he sat down and waited for Kathy to get back. The door opened and then closed behind Kathy.

"Not like that Da. Cross you're arms like I showed you and try to relax."

Kathy set about positioning her father.

"You do realize how embarrassing this is," he said once she had started to draw.

"Jay said the same thing. Once he got used to it, sometimes he would go to sleep. Now he doesn't mind."

"I don't think his father would have done this."

"Jay says he's like him but not exactly like him. You always say I look like Mummy."

"You do look like her, in some ways you're very like her."

"I think I'm like you. I get embarrassed easily."

"You aren't embarrassed doing this," Rory said.

"It's art, its different. I like to learn new things like you do. Now be quiet I have to concentrate."

Rory was getting tired from sitting in one position for so long. He was still feeling a little embarrassed but he was starting to relax a little. After half an hour Kathy finally spoke.

"You can take a break now, then we'll try another one. Did you bring your robe down?"

"No, I never thought of it."

"I'll go get it for you," she said.

Rory went over and looked at the sketch his daughter had done of him. He was quite impressed by the quality of her work and found himself feeling no embarrassment at all at the modesty of the pose.

Kathy stuck her arm in the door with his robe.

"Here," she said.

He took it and put it on, then opened the door wider.

"So how was it? Was it as bad as you thought it would be?" she asked him.

"No, not that bad. It's a very nice sketch," he said.

"I'd like to do another one, if you have time."

"Another half hour then?" Rory asked with a sigh.

"It's not really that horrible Da," Kathy coaxed.

"No, it's not. It's a much different experience than I thought it would be."

"Will you pose for me again another day?"

"Perhaps. We'll see how we both feel about it after today."

Kathy put her arms around her father and hugged him. "I love you, Da. You make a wonderful model."

Rory blushed. "Just don't let the word get around."

Kathy showed her father the next pose she wanted to try of him.

"Kathy, I don't think. I didn't think you wanted to draw me from the front," he said swallowing and looking like he was going to run out the door.

"Please, Da, just try. I'll close my eyes while you take off your robe and you'll have the sheet."

There was such a look of disappointment on her face that he finally gave in. He couldn't look his daughter in the eye while she positioned him. He had to keep his eyes firmly fixed on a spot on the wall.

"Try to relax Da. You'll get cramps."

Rory let out the breath he had been holding. He could feel the blush coloring his skin. Finally after what seemed like an eternity. Kathy came over and handed him his robe.

"There, I'm finished. I'll show you the sketches once you're dressed."

Kathy left the sitting room taking her art supplies with her. Rory slowly got dressed. He still thought he was going to be sick. The first pose from the back hadn't been so bad, but the one from the front had been distressing.

"Well, how did it go?" Sybil asked when Rory came back in the kitchen. Kathy was there with a hopeful look on her face.

"Not too bad," he finally managed to get out. The color was creeping up his cheeks.

"Come and see," Kathy showed them the two sketches she had done. The one from the back Rory had seen before and didn't find as distressing.

"It's very nice work, Kathy," Sybil said.

When Kathy turned the page, Rory almost passed out. There he was in all his glory for the world to see. He had been so upset he had forgotten the sheet.

"It's an excellent likeness of your father," Sybil said. "It's really quite beautiful. What do you think Rory?" Sybil glanced at her husband to see him looking pale.

"I…I'm not sure how I feel about it," he said at last. "It is very well done, but it's very unsettling to know it's you and that your daughter drew it."

"You mean you won't pose for me again?" Kathy asked him.

"I didn't say that," he said back pedaling quickly. "Maybe you could show us some of your other drawings. Maybe Auntie would pose for you as well."

Sybil elbowed him in the ribs.

"I'll do it for you one day if you like Kathy," she said. "Just give me some notice."

Kathy nodded and turned back to some of her first drawings.

"They're hard to share with other people. Jay is the only one who's seen them."

Her parents were captivated by the images of Riordan's children Kathy had drawn. They were all portraits and captured the children well. When she got to the section of her book where she had been drawing Jay, Sybil drew in a breath quickly. The pictures lacked the small differences that separated her son and his father. It was like looking back in time. Kathy suddenly stopped turning the pages.

"You might find the next one shocking," she said. "Jay drew a few of me as well. He's quite good. He could be even better if he practiced."

She looked at her father's face to see a look of resignation.

"Have you taken your clothes off for anyone else?" he asked quietly.

"No, just in front of Jay," Kathy said blushing. "He posed for me. It was only fair."

"I doubt he saw it like that," her father said.

"Oh, Da, we've been swimming often enough, it wasn't that much different."

Kathy finally turned the page. She was right. He did have raw talent. The two of them were even more alike than their parents had realized. When she got to the first of the pictures of Jay working Sybil stopped her from turning the page.

"It's an amazing portrait," Sybil said quietly.

"By the time I drew this group, Jay was so used to posing he didn't even notice. He kept right on working. He's so attractive it makes him easy to draw. You'd be the same way Da, if you would just relax."

Kathy continued showing them her drawings. The later pictures were all scenery until she ended with the ones of her father.

"I have more scenery ones in another book as well."

"You really know what you want now?" her father asked her quietly once she had closed the book. There was no more denying it. She had artistic talent and was putting it into practice.

"I do, I want to design gardens and I want to marry Jay. I like to draw and I'll probably keep experimenting with it, but my real love is gardens."

"When is Jay coming again?" Rory asked.

"Four weeks from now for Christmas. Can you pose for me again tomorrow?"

"Yes," he replied with a sigh. "You really have grown up."

"Not that much, I still need my Da to be my model," Kathy said in a teasing voice before she dropped a kiss on his cheek.


	28. Kathy and Jay Part II

The Romance of Kathy and Jay Part II

Chapter Eight

Jay arrived for Christmas 1946 happy to see Kathy. He was tired from the long trip and the last few months at work. He stepped down from the train, dropped his bag and threw his arms around her. He kissed her for so long they got a few whistles from the other passengers before he released her. Her cheeks were flushed pink and she didn't even notice the other people passing by.

"Our parents have accepted the idea of us getting married," she told him as they headed home.

"I thought they would given time. What changed their minds?" Jay asked her.

"I'll show you later," Kathy said.

"Should I be concerned?"

"You won't believe it," she replied.

Mrs. Shay had gone to her son's for the holidays and it was just the family. Jay greeted his mother and Collin. It was early evening and Rory was soon home from the hospital.

"Kathy tells us you can deny her nothing," Rory said when they were setting up the Christmas tree that evening.

"She has me wrapped around her little finger," Jay admitted.

"You two had a rather interesting time in Chelmsford. I have to admit I'm glad you're here. Now I'm off the hook," Rory said blushing a little.

"Off the hook for what?" Jay asked mystified.

"Da has been sitting for me," Kathy informed Jay happily. "You're mother did once too."

Jay had a look of alarm. He had expected Rory to punch his lights out if he ever found out.

"Only when the housekeeper isn't here. If she got ahold of it with her clacking tongue everyone in town would know in the blink of an eye. I'd be a laughing stock. Posing in the nude for your daughter to draw you isn't the most respectable thing for a doctor to be doing."

"You're very accepting," Jay said ruefully. "I expected you to be mad."

"Kathy is very talented," Sybil said. "It would be a shame not to foster it."

"You're mother forced me at first. Now it's not so bad," Rory said.

"Da you can't even look at me," Kathy said with a laugh. "You should see him he stares at the wall or the ceiling."

"I think I'll pass," Jay said. He wasn't keen on the idea of seeing his future father-in-law in the buff although they had been swimming in the altogether often enough when they went on fishing trips.

"Kathy showed us the sketches she had done of you. They're very good," his mother said.

"Mum," Jay said turning red as a beet. "I don't know if I like the idea of my mother seeing me without clothing.

"Don't be such a prude, Jay," Sybil said. "You consented to be an artist's model, now you have to take the consequences."

"I've got to buy you a book on drawing something different," Jay said to Kathy. He certainly hoped she hadn't told them the part about her being nude as well.

"I can't believe you've accepted things so easily," Jay said.

"We didn't accept things easily," Rory replied. "We have both come to realize Kathy is grown up and pursuing her own interests. There is no denying the two of you are a great deal alike."

"I stopped to see Grandmamma. The reception to the news of Kathy and I getting married wasn't good," Jay said.

"What did my family have to say son?" Sybil asked.

Jay stopped hanging baubles on the tree and went to sit beside my mother.

"It was quite the scene. Aunt Mary couldn't see why I wasn't marrying into the aristocracy like Riordan. Uncle Matthew accused her of being a snob. Grandmamma said I may look like my father but I was acting just like you. Aunt Edith said I should marry who I liked and Uncle Anthony is so deaf he kept asking everyone to repeat what they had said."

Kathy came over to Jay.

"You make it sound like a cartoon roll at the cinema," she said placing a kiss on his cheek and smoothing his hair.

"I only wish it was," he replied. "I didn't think they would care that much."

"My family can be rather overwhelming at times," Sybil replied. "It took them a long time to accept your father. They were more accepting of Rory because he had already been accepted amongst the peers because of his education. They'll calm down."

Collin dug a glass bauble out of a box and handed it to Jay. Jay got up and held him up so he could hang it higher on the tree.

"I'd like to get married in London," Jay said finally. "Work has been busy, I've pretty much used up my time off for the next while. It would be easier."

"London is fine Jay," Kathy replied. "I don't care where we get married as long as Da and your mother are there. I know how hard you work."

"Jay don't let work take over your life, like your father did," Sybil said.

"I'm not Mum. I took a lot of days off this fall. I'm using the last of them now. I won't have more until June."

"Is Jay really exactly like his father?" Kathy asked. They had finished putting the decorations on the tree. She went to sit beside Jay and took his hand.

"In looks, very," Rory replied. "In other ways as well, but he doesn't have his father's patience."

"I do tend to be impatient. I always want things to work right away," Jay said. "Our voices are the same but our accents are different. When my Da spoke it was like listening to poetry. I usually manage to put my foot in my mouth which is the total opposite of my father, but you already knew that."

"Your father put his foot in his mouth many times when we were courting. He was impatient when he was sick," Sybil finally said thoughtfully. "He could never wait to get better and go onto the next thing. You have his ambition. Tom was kind and loving like you and never let on when something bothered him. I always knew right where to find him. He'd be fixing one of the cars. I'd just sit and wait until he would finally tell me what it was. In that you are exactly alike."

"Some things are eerily similar," Rory agreed, "but they're not the same person. I have to admit there are times when you forget it's not his father sitting there."

"The oddest thing is Rory, Tom and Jay all share many of the same mannerisms," Sybil said. "It's just little things like the way you stand when you're thinking something over, or when you tell a joke. No one would know you aren't blood relations."

"It is a bit odd, isn't it," Jay said. "I thought of Rory as my older brother for years. Then I thought of Kathy as a stepsister. Now all that has changed."

"Things change, but as the two of you have pointed out, we aren't actually blood relations. We are relatives by choice." Rory said. "I have to go to bed. Work in the morning. It never ends."

Once everyone else had settled for the evening Kathy and Jay curled up in front of the fire in the sitting room. The electric lights from the Christmas tree reflected off the ornaments and created a colored shadow on the ceiling.

"I've missed you so much," Kathy said, after their first kiss ended.

"I've missed you too. Coming home to an empty flat has been torture," Jay replied. He had the top two buttons of her blouse open and was kissing the valley between her breasts. He looked up at her. "I haven't missed the cold showers though," he said with a devilish grin.

"Jay, you're terrible," Kathy said with a slight laugh.

She pulled off his vest, undid his tie, and opened the buttons of his shirt.

"I've missed this a great deal," she said running her hands over his chest.

"And here I thought you had replaced my modeling prowess with your father's," he teased.

"How does it feel to know your mother has seen sketches of you naked as the day you were born?" she teased back.

Jay had slipped the buttons of her blouse open and was busy undoing her bra.

"It's a little embarrassing. Not as embarrassed as we'll be if someone walks in and catches us in a few minutes though," he said between kisses.

"Jay, before we go any further. I want to set some ground rules," Kathy said.

He stopped what he was doing and looked at her. She was growing up by leaps and bounds and was less afraid to say what was on her mind.

"I don't want to risk making a baby before we're married. I think we should wait with that part of things," she said quietly. "I love you and I want to, but we need to wait."

He looked into her face for a moment before he replied.

"We'll wait. We'll only go as far as we've gone before at the most."

Kathy buried her face against his chest and nodded.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry, speaking your mind is nothing to be sorry about," he said kissing the top of her head and putting his arms around her to pull her close. "I've missed you terribly and I've missed touching you. In two months we'll be wed and we can spend all weekend naked in our flat doing whatever we like."

"Mmm, that sounds lovely," Kathy murmured. She moved to place her lips against his. She slid her tongue into his mouth and stroked his tongue with hers. Jay was a little surprised at her taking the lead but was enjoying it. He pushed her blouse down her arms. It was quickly followed by her bra. He rolled her on her back and began exploring her chest with his lips and hands. Once he lost his shirt, she put it on while he was undoing her skirt. He pushed off her skirt then moved to pull her underwear down.

"Not so fast," she whispered against his lips. She undid his belt and the clasp of his trousers to reach her hand inside his shorts and caress him. "I've missed this, too," she said. Jay groaned and reached down to push the rest of his cloths off. He moved so she could keep rubbing him while he pulled her underwear off. His mouth ran over her body. He was frantic from being away from her so long and wanted to kiss and taste every inch. Finally he sat up with his legs apart and pulled her so she was leaning back against him. His one hand caressed her breasts while the other went between her legs to rub her intimately.

"Jay, I can't reach," she complained.

"Sh, just relax and enjoy it. You can play with mine again in a minute," he whispered.

The lights from the tree were splashed across her skin. His fingers moved at a rapid pace making her gasp and arch back against him. His mouth found hers as her head fell back. He circled her vagina with his fingers teasing the opening with one then sliding it back up to the top to begin the pattern all over again. Kathy was panting, her hands grasping his thighs. His hand closed firmly over one breast as she started to convulse into her release.

"Sh," he whispered into her ear. "We have to be quiet."

She bit her lip to keep from crying out. As her orgasm subsided she opened her eyes. She pushed Jay back and lay on top of him covering his body with hers.

"Thank you," she whispered.

"You're welcome, but we're not done yet," he whispered back. "I'll make you go again."

"Jay?" Kathy's eyes opened questioningly.

"We'll try and go together. This time I won't make such a mess." He reached over and pulled a handkerchief out of his pants pocket and put it where they could reach. She put her mouth against his and kissed him. She could feel his penis pressing against her intimately. She had to resist the urge to press it into herself harder. Jay rolled her over and kissed her breasts and abdomen. His fingers moved to caress her again as she stroked and fondled his erection. It was all Kathy could do not to pull him closer and find the perfect fit for their bodies. She could feel the tension building in her privates and abdomen. Her heart was beating almost out of her chest as she felt her body begin to convulse again. Jay quickly grabbed the handkerchief with his other hand and caught his ejaculation as it poured out. He wadded it up the handkerchief and threw it into the dying fire in the grate. They lay watching each other slowly stroking and touching each other not speaking. Finally, they collected their clothing, put out the lights of the Christmas tree and went up the stairs hand in hand. They kissed one last time at the top of the stairs before they each went to their respective rooms.

Jay was up for Christmas for a week. The two of them spent almost all of their time together and went for a walk to see the waterfall in winter where they had first kissed. It was even more pristine in the dead of winter with icicles hanging from the sides and from the surrounding rocks.

"It will always be our spot," Jay said.

"I've always loved it here. I love it more now, because of us," Kathy said. "When we get back I want to show you my sketches and watercolors. You still haven't seen my newer ones."

"I don't know if I want to see our parents without clothes."

"It's not our parents. It's art. I thought you supported my interests."

"I do," Jay replied, properly chastised. "I would love to see your new sketches."

When Kathy showed him the sketches she had been doing he could see improvement in her work. She had used more modest poses with their parents and his mother was almost completely draped.

"I'm surprised to say, I actually like them quite a lot," he said. "I think you've improved again."

"Will you pose for me this afternoon?"

"Our parents are home," Jay said nervously.

"They won't mind. You can pose in your bedroom. I'll go and tell Da, so we won't be disturbed."

"I won't need a cold shower after this," Jay muttered as he headed for the stairs. It changed things when your parents were home and knew exactly what you were doing.

Kathy came in, locked the door and showed him where she wanted him to sit.

"Jay don't look so serious. You look like you're going to the gallows. Relax. You're not usually this tense," she said.

"Your father isn't usually in the other room."

"I've locked the door we won't be disturbed."

Jay took a breath and tried to relax, it just wasn't happening.

He stood up suddenly, walked over to her and started undoing the buttons on her dress.

"I just can't relax. Try it the usual way," he said quietly.

"Fine," Kathy replied. She quickly removed her clothing and went back to her book. "Do you feel better?"

"Much, but I still expect your father to come through the door at any minute" Jay said. He relaxed into the pose.

"I wish you'd come back with me," he said after a while.

"I don't think I should," Kathy said distractedly. "We'd never make it to the wedding night."

Jay waited a while longer.

"Maybe we could talk your father into letting us get married sooner."

"I think he's pretty set on me waiting for my birthday," Kathy replied. "Jay stop squirming."

"Sorry. You could stay with Riordan and Janine."

"I don't want to impose on their generosity. Besides Da and Auntie need me to watch Collin when Mrs. Shay is off."

"My turn," Jay said once Kathy had finished her sketch. He walked the few steps across the room and picked up the book. He looked at the picture of himself before he turned the page. He got his shirt and held it out for Kathy to put on then had her lay on the bed. He arranged his shirt then went back to sit on the chair.

"If I can't have you for another two months," he said. "I'll just have to draw you and imagine what I want to do to you."

He took his time drawing her. By the time he was finished she had dozed off on the bed.

"Wake up sleepy head," he said shaking her shoulder slightly.

"How long have I been asleep?" she asked.

"We've been up here over an hour, we should probably go back down stairs," he replied. He pulled the page out of Kathy's sketchbook he had been drawing on.

"Jay you'll damage my book," she complained.

"I want to take it with me," he said.

Kathy reached for the page in his hand. She was surprised to see the quality of the drawing when he had taken more time. The image of her made her look appealing in a way she had never thought of herself.

"It's lovely, Jay. What are you going to do with it?"

"Frame it and put it beside my bed so I see you when I wake up in the mornings," he said placing the drawing in his case.

"I wanted to do another one of you, that I can give to your mother," Kathy said. "Oh look at the time. We'll be late for tea if we don't hurry up."

She got up and went to reach for her clothes. Jay was standing so close he slipped his arms around her and kissed her pressing her back against the wall slightly. She could feel him starting to get an erection and it pressing against her intimately.

"You're incredibly sexy in my shirt," he said before he released her. Kathy swallowed and licked her lips. It was all she could do not to throw her arms around him and beg him to make love to her right then and there.

"It's getting harder to say no, isn't it," she said quietly looking down at his body and semi-erect penis.

"It is. We'll do it because it's what you really want. Get your cloths on before our Da is knocking at the door," Jay said.

Kathy dressed quickly. She was so hot and bothered she couldn't look at him. Once they were fully dressed she collected her materials and they headed downstairs.

"How did it go?" her father asked not looking up from the journal he was reading at the kitchen table.

"Fine," Kathy said. "Jay is a good model. He doesn't complain half as much as you, Da."

"I feel ridiculous posing," her father said.

"But you look beautiful," Sybil said dropping a kiss on his mouth.

"Men aren't beautiful," Rory replied.

"Some are," Sybil said. "You are and so are both of my son's."

"Mum," you're embarrassing," Jay complained.

"Your mother is right, you are beautiful," Kathy teased. "You're so pretty you could be a girl."

"Why did I ever open my mouth and volunteer to pose for you," Jay groaned.

"Because you love me, and want to give me whatever I want," Kathy retorted.

"Name it and I'll buy it," Jay said.

"Let's see, I want a husband, who's my best friend and will pose for me whenever I ask him to," Kathy replied. "Oh I forgot something. I want a new toaster for the flat. Yours always burns everything. Or better yet, why don't you just mend it? You can mend anything."

"I think I can fill that order," Jay said giving her a quick kiss. "Right now I need to take a shower."

"I thought you took a shower this morning. You're going to use up all the hot water," his mother said.

"Mum, I haven't used a drop of hot water since I got here," Jay replied.

Rory looked up and opened his mouth to say something then closed it. The color crept up his cheeks as a small smile spread across his face.

"Glad to hear it, son. Enjoy your shower," he finally said before he gathered up his journal and headed into the sitting room.

* * *

Chapter Nine

"Where are you two off to this afternoon," Sybil asked Kathy and Jay as they were getting ready to go out.

"Mary Riley is home for a few days. We're going to go over to see her and maybe stop by Jade MacDonald's as well," Kathy replied. "I wanted to introduce Jay. Don't wait tea for us. We should be gone quite a long while."

"Have a good afternoon then," Sybil said. "I'm going to get Collin down for a nap. He's worn out from Christmas."

Jay and Kathy headed off towards her friends. Jay had one more day before he returned to England and he was still trying to persuade Kathy to return with him. They were almost to Mary's when they ran into Jade. They chatted for a few minutes on the street. Kathy mentioned to Jade she had visited Oxford and Cambridge that fall.

"Did you take any pictures?" Jade said. "I'd love to see them."

"They're back at the house," Kathy replied. "We'll go back and pick up the photographs and a few things and meet you at Mary's."

Kathy and Jay stopped by the post office to pick up the mail, then headed back to get Kathy's photo album.

"Perhaps we should take along a packet of the chocolate covered biscuits you brought along," Kathy said. "Mary has such a large family it would be a treat for the little ones."

The house was quiet when they arrived. They headed for the sitting room to retrieve the things they wanted.

"I think the biscuits are under the tree," Jay said. "I'll get them."

"I don't know if I left my album and water color scenes in there as well. I think they're on the shelf," Kathy replied.

They entered the sitting room to look for the items when Kathy suddenly stopped dead in her tracks. Jay was almost to the tree before he noticed anything amiss.

"Kathy, Jay! What are you doing back so soon?" his mother said in a startled voice.

Jay turned around to see his mother and Rory lying on a blanket in front of the fireplace. A fire was merrily burning in the grate. Their parents were obviously naked and had hastily pulled a blanket over themselves. Rory's face and upper body were as red as a beet.

"Just came back for a packet of biscuits," Jay mumbled. He grabbed the biscuits and turned around heading out of the room as quickly as he could. Kathy was standing with her mouth open not able to move. He grabbed Kathy's hand and drug her behind him out of the room. Once they were back in the kitchen with the sitting room door firmly closed behind them, Kathy buried her face against his chest.

"How can I ever look my father in the face again," she said. "I'm so embarrassed."

"Not half as embarrassed as he was," Jay said chuckling a bit.

"Jay it's not funny. I saw his bare bum and he was on top of her, before he pulled the blanket over them."

"You've drawn his bare bottom before," he said still laughing a bit.

"Not when he was doing THAT to Auntie!" Kathy said. "It's not funny."

"Oh, Kathy let's go to your friends house," Jay said. "It's a little unsettling to walk in on them I must admit, but they are married with a young child. You must have known they get busy often enough. You can hear them almost every night."

"You can?" Kathy said looking up at Jay somewhat shocked.

"What did you think all that bed squeaking coming from their room was?"

"I don't know. I just thought they rolled around in bed a lot."

"You could call it that," Jay said laughing. He pulled her close to him and kissed the top of her hair. "My mother can be somewhat vocal at times. When I was little, it was "Tom, oh, Tom more" almost everyday. When we were little we didn't understand. When we got a bit older Riordan and I used to go out and play catch for a bit until they quieted down."

Kathy thought of the times she had walked by their room and heard "Faster Rory, faster," or her father saying "Oh Yes, Yes!" She blushed and put her hands on her cheeks. "What does the squeaky bed have to do with it? I used to hear that even before they got married. I just thought one of them couldn't sleep."

"You honestly don't know?" Jay asked her.

Kathy shook her head.

"I'd be quite happy to demonstrate later," he said kissing her temple and whispering into her ear. She gave him a quick kiss before she pushed on his shoulder and ran upstairs to see if her books were in her room.

A few minutes later they had their items and were headed to her friend's home.

"When we get back we'll just pretend we didn't see a thing, OK?" Jay said before they got to Mary's.

"I'm going to try and blot it out of my mind forever," Kathy said blushing with a slight shiver.

"Kiss me and I'll blot it out for you," Jay said pulling her close.

They had a good time visiting with Kathy's friends. Jay spoke Irish fluently, which made him an instant hit with her friend's siblings and parents despite his polished English accent. It was well after teatime before they headed back to the house.

"Did you have a nice visit?" his mother asked when they got back to the house as if nothing was amiss.

"Quite nice," Jay said, giving his mother a peck on the cheek. "Where's Rory?"

"Out seeing to the animals. He'll be in in a bit," Sybil replied.

Kathy was looking decidedly uncomfortable and her eyes were darting every which way.

"I think I'll go have a word with Da," she finally said.

Sybil watched her as she headed out the door.

"She's a bit upset Mum. She's embarrassed."

"Rory is terribly embarrassed as well. Kathy has lead a very sheltered life. I hope you realize that."

"I know that Mom. I take care of her and I haven't been pushing her. We're taking things slow."

"That's good son. Now come and help me with the dinner."

Kathy went out to the barn to find her father. He was in a stall brushing his horse while the animal contentedly munched on the hay he had just been given.

"Hello Da," Kathy said not looking up.

"Did you have a good visit," Rory asked her. He kept brushing his horse.

"Yes, we showed everyone the pictures of my trip to England."

Rory continued brushing the horse for a few minutes not saying anything.

"Kathy, earlier…we weren't expecting you back so soon," he said finally. He stepped out of the stall and put away the brushes. "I hope you're not too upset."

"It was rather a shock to see my father like that." Kathy said with a blush. She paused, "Da why didn't you ever tell me about what goes on between a man and a woman. I feel so stupid every time I find out something new."

"It's hard to talk to your own child about these things," he said. "I told Riordan and Jay the facts of life when their father was so tongue tied he couldn't get a word out. It was the only time I had ever seen him like that."

"I rather hear things from you than get them other places. I didn't even know what it meant when the bed squeaked until Jay told me."

"What did he say about a squeaky bed?"

"He said it meant the couple was "getting busy." I didn't understand what it had to do with a squeaky bed. I still don't." She still wasn't looking at her father.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you the facts of life sooner," he said. "I was embarrassed and trying to protect you. Are you mad that I didn't tell you these things?"

"A little. I'm getting married in a few months and I still don't know really what to expect. It's a bit frightening. I asked Auntie but she only told me a little bit. It was all kind of vague."

"Do you want to go for a walk now? I'll answer your questions and try not to be such a bad father."

"You're not a bad father," Kathy said. She rushed over and put her arms around his waist and hugged him. "I love you, Da."

"I love you too," Rory said hugging her tight and kissing her hair. The tears were forming in the corner of his eyes. "Now, we'll tell the others we're going for a walk and I'll tell you what you need to know. There are a few things about men that may surprise you."

Kathy nodded and smiled at her father.

The last day of Jay's visit he tried to persuade Kathy yet again to return to England with him.

"Please come back with me. I'll send a telegram to Riordan and Janine. You can stay with them. I promise to behave myself. I miss you so much when we're apart I can't think straight," he pleaded.

"I'll go back with you if you can convince my father," Kathy said finally. She was feeling much better about things since her talk with her father the night before. He had told her a lot about men in general and given her advice on birth control. Once he had opened up, he had been the best source of information Kathy could have hoped for.

"No one ever died from not having sex," he told her. "But many have died from having it. Stick to one person for your entire life and you have nothing to worry about."

Jay talked to their parents and Rory finally gave his consent for Kathy to return to England with Jay. He couldn't see the point in holding onto his little girl anymore when all of her friends had found jobs away from home. Kathy was just putting in time staying with them in Listowel. In England she would have more opportunities to explore her career choice and be able to start planning for her wedding.

"I will make arrangements for time off once everyone is back at the hospitals in January," Rory said. "I should be able to get time at the beginning of March if all goes well. I'll let you know when. Then you can set the date."

Kathy and Sybil were in a flurry of packing and the two men decided to go to the pub for a few pints to get away from the women. They had finished three rounds and played two games of darts when they both had to go to the men's room.

Rory had washed his hands and was waiting for Jay who was at the sink.

"I don't know how the hell you can pose for Kathy and go to sleep. I sweat bullets the entire time."

"Easy," Jay said as he dried his hands. His head was buzzing from the pints he had consumed and he wasn't thinking too fast. "After the first time I had her take her clothes off too. It's easy when I have something pleasant to look at."

Jay staggered back when Rory's fist connected with his jaw.

"That's for telling my daughter a squeaky bed means her parents are getting busy and for looking at her with her clothes off," Rory said.

Jay just stood there weaving slightly.

"I had that coming," Jay said after a minute. "Let's go get another drink."

"You're buying," Rory replied. He threw his arm around Jay's shoulders once they were back at the bar. "Did I ever tell you about the time I caught seven fish in one afternoon? Jumped right out of the water into the basket. Didn't even have to use bait."

"Good thing," Jay replied weaving unsteadily. "I always feel sorry for the worm."

* * *

Chapter Ten

"I'm not playing games Riordan, Kathy is sick," Jay said to his brother over the telephone when they finally made it to Jay's flat. There had been a winter storm and the crossing had been rough delaying the ferry and making them late for their train. Kathy had been sick on the ferry and on the train. The delays had worn her out even more to the point where she had vomited on the cab ride from the station to the flat.

"I'm worried. She hasn't stopped being sick for the last ten hours," Jay said. "I don't know what to do… Alright I'll try it… I'll put her on the train to you once she's better. I have to go. She's sick again… Yes, yes, I'll have her call you once she's able."

Jay went to the washroom to find Kathy lying on the floor. Her face was white as a sheet and she was groaning.

"Janine said to try bicarbonate of soda in water," Jay said.

"No," Kathy managed to groan. She sounded like she was going to break out in sobs. "Just water."

Jay got a cold cloth and wiped her face and neck. He had never seen anyone get motion sick like this and was at his wits end to know what to do. He finally scooped her up in his arms and carried her to the bed. By the time they got there she was passed out.

"Good God," Jay muttered under his breath. He hadn't been feeling so well himself on the crossing on top of being hung over from going out with Rory. Dealing with Kathy getting sick was frustrating beyond belief. He had no idea where she had packed a nightgown. He opted for one of his own shirts. He finally managed to get her changed into his shirt and into bed. By the time he was done he flopped into bed beside her and put out the light only to be woken a half-hour later by her dashing to the washroom to be sick again.

Jay had to go into work the next day. He made a quick trip to the bakeshop down the street to get a few buns, left a note and some money on the table for Kathy and headed out the door. He was already late.

Kathy woke mid-morning. Her stomach still hurt but at least the room had stopped spinning in circles. She got a drink of water and nibbled on one of the buns Jay had bought before she headed into the washroom for a bath. She called Janine to let her know she would most likely take the train the following morning. Kathy couldn't face the prospect of taking a train and the motion sickness starting all over again so soon after the last bought.

Once she was dressed and had eaten the rest of her bun, Kathy decided to go to the shops and see what she could find for a simple dinner. The shops were rather bare after Christmas. She finally selected some potatoes and a few vegetables for a soup and headed back to the flat. She arrived back to find a woman standing on the stoop impatiently ringing the bell for Jay's flat.

"Hello, can I help you," Kathy said.

"I'm looking for James Branson. Do you know where he is?" the woman said with a Scottish accent. Her hair was perfectly done. She was wearing expensive cloths and looked to be about twenty-four years old. Kathy thought she looked very pretty and sophisticated with her dark red lipstick. Kathy's father had always said lip rouge was for ladies of the night and not appropriate for his daughter. Kathy had never worn it to keep her Da happy.

"He's at work. He won't be back till this evening. Did you want to leave him a message?" Kathy said.

"I don't have any writing materials with me. Who might you be?" the woman inquired.

"Kathy Lester. I'm his fiancée. What do you want with Jay?"

"His fiancée? Is that what he's calling it these days. My, my, he always did like them young. Maybe I will leave him that note if I can come in." She gave Kathy an appraising look.

Kathy nodded and unlocked the door. The flat was in a bit of a mess from Kathy being ill and she hadn't made the bed yet. The woman looked pointedly at the ruffled bed while she waited for Kathy to get her pen and paper.

"You still haven't told me who you are," Kathy said.

"I'm June. James and I were rather close when he lived in Scotland during the war. I was hoping to renew our friendship. He was always so…passionate, I could always overlook his little trifles. I rather miss him and his dull speeches on the wonders of electronics. He always made up for it in other areas."

June had finished writing out her note. She folded it and left if on the table.

"Please make sure he gets my message," June said before she left.

Kathy hadn't said a word after June's speech. Kathy knew he had gone out with other girls previously, but the way June had spoken she made it seem like Jay had gone out with a lot of girls and done more than kissing or holding hands. Kathy felt sick. The Jay she knew was always fun and attentive and doted on her. Jay, her Jay was a ladies man? She knew very little of his life before they had started spending time together. She found herself feeling more and more jealous. Why did he want her? Was he playing a game as he had done with other girls and going to drop her once they had slept together?

Kathy felt uneasy. She wanted nothing more than to grab her cases and take the train to Riordan and Janine's this instant. She couldn't do it. She had to speak to Jay first and she was still so queasy there was no way she could make the trip. Finally she made the bed and cut up the vegetables for the soup. She tried to ignore the note on the table but it was sitting there irritating the corner of her consciousness and not letting her alone. Kathy got out a book she had received for Christmas on drawing landscapes and curled up on the sofa. She tried to concentrate on her book but it was to no avail. That note was practically waving at her by the time she heard Jay's key in the lock late in the afternoon.

"I'm glad to see you're up and looking better," he said. He came over to kiss her. Kathy barely acknowledged his presence. He was surprised when she didn't put her arms around his neck and kiss him back as was her custom.

"You had a visitor," she said quietly. "She left you a note."

"Did she leave a name?" Jay asked watching Kathy. He could tell she was upset.

"She said her name was June."

Jay exhaled sharply.

"What did she want?"

"She said she missed your passionate nature and wanted to renew your friendship," Kathy said not looking at him.

"Is that so," Jay said angrily. He went to the table, picked up the offending note and ripped it into tiny pieces without reading it. "I never want to see that scheming harlot again. What did she say that has you so upset?"

"Who was she Jay?" Kathy asked.

Jay crossed back over to Kathy and sat down beside her on the sofa. He took her hand. "Do you remember the Christmas when our parents got engaged and we first started spending time together?"

Kathy nodded.

"Not long before that I had been engaged to her. She was pretty and said all the right things and pretended she liked me. I came to realize she liked the money I made and the fact that my family is of the aristocracy. I was flattered and taken in by her attention and her looks. She didn't care for me one bit. She really is a nasty piece of work. We broke it off a few months before that Christmas. I haven't seen or heard from her since."

"She made it sound like you were a ladies man and had been with a lot of girls," Kathy said sorrowfully.

"Oh Kathy, young men do stupid things. I wasn't with a lot of girls. When I first went to university girls followed me around. I came from a family with a big house in London. My father had a top job in politics and my grandfather was an Earl. Girls paid me a lot of attention. They could smell the money. I was lonely and flattered. I went out with a lot of different girls, people often assumed more was going on than really was. I had one or two encounters, but I realized pretty quickly they weren't really interested in me, nor I in them. It's all in the past. What counts is that I haven't looked at anyone else since I started spending time with you. There won't be anyone else for me now or ever."

"What if you find me lacking? I have no experience. You might get tired of me and move on," Kathy said. She still hadn't looked up.

"You are perfect for me. How can you doubt it? You're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. I could kiss you non-stop until next Christmas and never get tired of it. I've always thought you'd grow up and realize just how dull and boring I am, but it hasn't happened. We're closer than ever. I'll never get tired of you. I want to pledge the rest of my life to you."

"You're sure?" Kathy asked.

"Are you sure you won't get tired of me?" Jay replied. For all his outward confidence he still worried that Kathy would change her mind at the last minute and decide not to marry him.

"I'm sure. I've never wanted anyone else," she said sliding her arms around him and resting her head on his shoulder. "If that awful woman ever comes back, can I close the door in her face?"

"Be my guest," Jay said. "There's a dance coming up in a few days for New Year's. I'm counting on you going with me and keeping the rest of the women away. I won't dance with anyone else."

"What if Riordan and Janine come?"

"Riordan can dance with his own wife. You're all mine," Jay said tightening his arms around her.

"Jay," Kathy said. "You're squeezing me too tight. My stomach still hurts."

"Sorry," he said relaxing his hold slightly. "Better?"

Kathy nodded against him. She still hadn't let go of the past.

"You're still upset aren't you?" Jay asked her.

"A little."

Jay thought about it for a bit.

"I don't know what to tell you to make it better," Jay said. "Maybe you could think about it like when your Da was adopted. No one blames him for what happened before. It just happened. He's not that boy any more. He changed. I'm not the person I was then either. I know what I want now and what I want is you."

"Forever?"

"Yes, forever."

"Let's have something to eat. I made some potato soup."

"Am I forgiven?"

"Yes," she said kissing him on the lips. He kissed her back soundly before he let her go.

"When do you want to go to Riordan's? I could put you on the train tonight."

"No I want to let my stomach calm down. Tomorrow is soon enough. I was thinking about something you should do after dinner."

"What is it?"

"I'll tell you after dinner," Kathy said with a small smile. "If my stomach settles down."

"It sounds intriguing," Jay said getting up to follow Kathy to his small kitchen where the soup was waiting.

"What were you thinking I should do after dinner?" Jay asked her once they had finished washing up.

Kathy got the toaster out of the cupboard and put it on the table.

"You wanted me to fix the toaster?" Jay asked her.

"Not right now," Kathy replied. "I just didn't want you to forget while I was at Riordan's."

"Then what is it?" Jay asked somewhat mystified.

"Guess," Kathy said. She smiled at him over her shoulder as she went to turn the radio on. She got some candles from a drawer in the sideboard and handed them to Jay before she clicked out the lights.

"You want to sketch me by candlelight?" he guessed.

"No, but that would be a good idea. We'll have to try it," Kathy replied. "This is something I've been wanting you to do ever since the last time I sketched you though."

"You want me to practice drawing?" Jay said. Kathy was busy opening the buttons of his shirt and pushing his vest off.

"Not quite," she murmured against his lips.

"You want me to practice kissing you?" he guessed. He was quite happy to oblige her on that score.

"That's part of it," she said. She had his shirt peeled down his shoulders and was working on his belt. "My stomach doesn't hurt anymore." She murmured between kisses. Jay had been working on her clothing as well and had her almost stripped down.

"What is it you want me to do?" he questioned still playing the game as he trailed kisses down her neck to her bare breasts and back up.

"Dance with me a little," Kathy replied. "Then show me why the bed squeaks."

"Kathy?" Jay said stopping what he was doing and looking her in the face. "I thought you wanted to wait."

"Da explained a few things to me. We don't have to wait. As long as we're careful of the days I shouldn't get with child. If I do I we'll be married soon. Would it make a difference to you if we had a child?"

"No difference at all to me," Jay replied. "We can always hire a Nanny so you can go to school."

"And how many children do you want?" Kathy said as she slid her arms around his neck and pressed herself closer.

"Six, one for each of the Nobel gases," Jay murmured as he kissed her again.

"You can't name a child Hellium. That's silly," Kathy said in a cloud of desire when they broke the kiss.

"Harkin or Honor," Jay murmured as he moved her hair to the side and kissed the side of her neck.

"Neon?" Kathy said as she threw her head back while Jay nibbled at her nipple.

"Nessan or Nainsi" he murmured as he moved to the other one. He swung her up into his arms and kissed her as he carried her across the room.

"Argon?" Kathy said with a gasp as he pulled her close once they were between the sheets.

"Alden or Adara," Jay replied. He had rolled Kathy onto her back and was playing with her folds while he kissed the tips of her breasts.

"Umm," Kathy moaned and bit her lip, "What about Krypton?"

"Kean or Kianna," he mumbled as he moved between her legs.

"Remember to go on the outside," Kathy whispered. She pulled him close and kissed his neck.

She felt Jay enter her just a little and pause, she wanted to push herself onto him, the anticipation was driving her mad.

"Xavier," Jay murmured.

"Hmm?" Kathy questioned not really listening as she enjoyed the sensation.

"Our fifth child's name," Jay said. He kissed her deeply as he pushed further inside her. Kathy froze for a minute when she felt things tear then relaxed against him as the sensation took over again. She was clinging to him as he moved. Sensation was everywhere and there was nothing in her mind but Jay and the movements of their bodies. Finally when she thought she couldn't take any more he slid his fingers between them and rubbed her intimately.

"Uh, more," she gasped, "Oh more. Jay, oh God Jay!" Her body convulsed as her orgasm took over. She felt Jay quickly leave her body as he shuddered against her and spilled himself onto the sheets. His eyes were squeezed shut and his teeth were clenched. He quickly moved back to kiss her on the lips, before he rolled on his back and pulled her on top of him.

"If we're going to do that all the time, we need to remember to bring something for the mess," he said. "We've got to change the bed."

Kathy laughed softly and put her head on his chest. "I love you, Jay, right down to the way you say things at the worst time."

He chuckled. "Drives most people up the wall."

"Not me."

"Riordan and Rory."

"What do your brother and my father have to do with what we just did?"

"Radon is the sixth gas. The names for our sixth child, Riordan for a boy and Rory for a girl."

"You'll never change will you?" Kathy said laughing into his chest.

"I love you with all that I am and that will never change," he replied kissing the top of her head. "Let's change the sheets. It really is uncomfortable lying on the wet."

They had a fresh set of sheets. Each of them was on either side of the bed and it was remade in no time. Kathy slid between the sheets of the freshly made bed and rolled on her side. She was watching Jay as he rolled the sheets in a ball and put them in the hamper he used for his laundry.

"You know I think we did something wrong," Kathy said. "I didn't hear the bed squeak once."

Jay stopped picking up the discarded clothing from the floor. He went to the bathroom and returned with a towel.

"I guess we'll just have to keep doing it till we get it right," he said as he moved to join her.

* * *

Chapter Eleven

Kathy arrived in London feeling more independent than she had done her entire life. Taking the train on her own and making her way to the house had been new experiences to her. Jay had come down for New Year's Eve for a party Janine had planned. True to his word, Jay had not let Kath dance with anyone else the entire evening. They were so lost in each other they barely noticed the other people or when the music stopped.

She heard from her father after the first of the year and the wedding date was set for March 3. The days leading up to the wedding were busy. A guest list was made and invitations were sent out. Kathy and Janine went around to see the people who were interested in garden designs and Kathy secured her first three design contracts.

"We can't not invite your sister," Kathy said when both Jay and Riordan had balked at the idea of Merilee being invited to the wedding.

"She always has something to say about everything," Riordan complained.

"Merilee is always trying to tell me what to do," Jay added.

"Maybe the pair of you should stop complaining and listen to what she says once in a while," Janine said unsympathetically. "She isn't always wrong."

"She usually is," Jay gripped not wanting to give in.

"I seem to remember her being very concerned about you, when you were working in Scotland," Janine said. "Perhaps you should think about that."

"She had a few derogatory things to say about my thought process back then," Jay said sourly.

"Was she wrong?" Janine asked him.

"No, not entirely," Jay admitted. "Actually she was right, but it was the way she said it."

"Sounds like someone else we all know," Kathy said dropping a kiss on Jay's cheek and coming to sit on his lap.

"She's not right about Mum's marriage," Riordan said. "Mum is married to a good man and happy enough. Merilee needs to accept it."

"When she sees how happy they are at the wedding she will. I'm sure of it," Janine replied.

"Maybe Kathy should show her the sketches of her father. Then she'd know why Mum is so happy," Jay said with a chuckle.

"What sketches of your father?" Riordan asked.

"Jay! I haven't told them," Kathy said, slapping Jay on his shoulder.

"And here I thought you'd have Riordan posing for you," Jay teased her.

"What sketches?" Riordan said with a dead serious expression on his face.

"You know I was doing human figure drawing last fall," Kathy said.

"Yes, you did some nice portraits," Janine said.

"I drew more than head and shoulder portraits," Kathy said. "My father scolded me when he first found out. He said if it is truly art then I shouldn't be embarrassed to show my sketches to people."

"What exactly did you draw?" Riordan asked.

"I'll show you," Kathy said.

"Do you have to," Jay whined.

"You're mother is right. You are a prude," Kathy said kissing Jay on the lips before she went to get her book. When she got back Jay's face was red as Kathy opened her sketchbook and handed it to Riordan.

"There are a few Jay drew as well. He would be even better if he practiced more."

"Is that my mother?" Riordan asked when he got to the sketches of Sybil. His eyes nearly bugged out of his head.

"Yes, what do you think?" Kathy asked.

"They're very beautiful, Kathy," Janine said.

"They're very well done, but I can't believe my mother posed for you."

"I needed a model and who better than the people you trust? I haven't been practicing since I've been here. I keep busy with landscapes when I don't have a model."

"You should have said something," Janine said. "Riordan would be happy to pose for you."

"Oh no he would not," Riordan said turning red.

"What's the matter brother, not so supportive of Kathy's career aspirations now?" Jay couldn't resist teasing him.

"I would love to have a sketch of you," Janine said. "Do you think you could do one for me, Kathy?"

"I could do one with just your shirt off, Riordan," Kathy said. "It wouldn't be any different than working in the garden. I've sketched you in your undershirt before."

"That I could do," Riordan quickly agreed.

"I rather like the full body pieces. Please, won't you do it for me?" Janine coaxed.

Jay was busy trying not to burst out laughing at his brother's dilemma.

"It really isn't that bad," Jay said. "Even her father has sat for her."

"I gave Da a sheet the first time, but he so flustered he forgot to put it on," Kathy said. "He was terribly embarrassed at first, but he managed to sit for me half a dozen times or so."

"Eeh, well um. If I do this I better not see myself hanging in the National Gallery one day," Riordan said. "Janine is this what you really want?"

"It would be a lovely image. You are rather nice looking you know," Janine said kissing him on the lips.

"Oh, Good God, alright!" Riordan said. "You do realize I'm going to be red as a beet the entire time. When do you want to do this?"

"Daytime is good when you have time off," Kathy said.

Janine clapped her hands, "He has tomorrow off all day," she said.

"I was going to wash the car," Riordan said.

"It's going to rain. You don't wash the car when it's raining," Janine countered.

"Change the oil?" Riordan tried with a rueful look.

Jay laughed. "You might as well give in, brother. If you want to support Kathy exploring her interests you're stuck with it."

"Can we at least lock the door while you're sketching so no one walks in?" Riordan asked.

"Yes, we can do that," Kathy said. "Janine can be there if you like."

"Someone has to mind the children," Janine replied.

"Jay?" Riordan asked.

"Sorry, I have to work to catch up on," Jay said laughing.

"I have an idea already," Kathy said. "We'll use draping at first until you get used to it."

"What I don't do for you," Riordan grumbled to his wife before he and Jay headed to the library.

"Posing will be good for him," Janine declared. "He's such an old stick in the mud sometimes."

"Riordan is very sweet," Kathy defended.

"He is and handsome as a dream," Janine said with a sigh.

Kathy just laughed and shook her head. It was Jay that who was handsome beyond compare. Riordan wasn't ugly but he was well, Riordan.

Jay was at the house in London for the weekend but had brought work with him. The next morning Janine found Kathy and Jay while they were finishing up the morning dishes.

"Riordan will meet you in the library in ten minutes," Janine told Kathy.

"Janine if he really doesn't want to then you shouldn't make him," Kathy said.

"Nonsense, he needs to loosen up," Janine replied.

Jay just laughed and shook his head.

"You see what you get from one little trip to an art gallery," he teased. "I'll have to go with you from now on and see what kind of books you're buying."

"What if I'm not accepted to Cambridge?" Kathy replied. "I'll have to make my way somehow."

"You could make your way as a wife and mother," he said.

"Jay, you know that is not what I want," Kathy said getting annoyed.

"You can start your own gardening company?" he said hopefully.

"We'll see. I've already met the people Kathy had lined up. I'll start working on the designs soon. I should be able to start work on them mid March."

"What about our honeymoon," he said wiping his hands then pulling her into an embrace.

"You said you didn't have time off this year because of university this fall," Kathy was stroking the few chest hairs at the base of his throat.

"We'll honeymoon on weekends," he said kissing her deeply.

"I have to go work with Riordan," Kathy said at last.

"Wouldn't you rather sketch me?" Jay said feeling a tinge of jealousy.

"I'll draw you all afternoon," Kathy said.

"Promise?" he said coping a feel across her butt before she turned to go upstairs.

"I said draw, we are in your brother's house."

"It's my mother's house. He just lives here," Jay said hopefully.

"You're just going to have to wait until this afternoon for my attention," Kathy said giving him a quick peck on the lips before she went upstairs to find Riordan.

In the end Riordan turned out to be almost as good a model as Jay. They had enough similarity in appearance, that Kathy had no problem knowing which poses would look best. She had given Riordan a sheet, and arranged it so he would not feel as exposed his first time sitting for her. He was in good shape so she had him start with a standing pose turned slightly away from her and holding the draping in his hand so his private area was covered.

"How do you feel about going without the draping?" Kathy asked him after she had finished the first two poses. "The pose I was thinking of for Janine wouldn't use it."

"Rory does this regularly?" Riordan questioned, he was holding the sheet waded around his waist.

"Yes, Da just doesn't look at me," Kathy replied. "We'll do another preliminary sketch today and if Janine likes the pose I'll get a larger paper to work on. By the time we're finished you won't even think about posing. Jay is posing for me this afternoon."

"Is he now," Riordan said. "That better be all he's doing."

"Riordan, did anyone ever tell you you're a good brother?" Kathy said. She guided him to the sofa in the library and had him lie down half reclined. She made sure he had a good pile of pillows to lie back on before she had him position his arms and legs where she wanted them.

"I don't think the topic has ever come up," he replied.

"You're a good brother to me," Kathy said dropping a kiss on his forehead, before she went to pick up her sketchbook with the sheet in her hand. "Take a deep breath and relax. Think about filing out the most boring paper work you can think of."

"You're a good sister to me as well," Riordan said after a few minutes. It wasn't long and his eyes started to close and he fell into a light sleep. He woke when Kathy covered him with the sheet and shook his shoulder.

"I'm done. You can get dressed now," she said. She picked up her things and left the room.

When Riordan exited the library he found Janine in the dining room with their youngest on her hip looking over the sketches Kathy had done. She had done one of him posed and one after he had fallen asleep on the sofa, plus two of him standing.

"I don't know which one I like best," Janine said. Jay came wandering in the dining room to see what was going on.

"That one," he said pointing to the one of Riordan sleeping.

"Why?" Riordan asked.

"The ones where you aren't paying attention are always best," Jay replied. "I notice the difference when Kathy draws me either sleeping or working. They are significantly better."

"You're the perfect model all the time," Kathy said giving Jay a peck on the cheek.

"I'm a better model when I ignore you," Jay replied.

"I can't believe I fell asleep," Riordan said.

"I do like the one of you sleeping, as well," Janine contributed.

"To turn it into a proper portrait, I'll need larger paper and a few more sittings," Kathy said.

"Then it will be Janine's turn," Riordan replied.

"Riordan!" Janine said flabbergasted. "I'm the mother of two children. I can't pose nude."

"My mother had four and she did it, so can you," Riordan said undeterred.

"Or you could do it together," Kathy said. "Something like this." She put her arms around Jay and fit her body to his with her head resting on his shoulder. She reached up and angled his face down then put her arm back around him.

"Just like this," Jay whispered. He was staring into her face. He slowly lowered his mouth to hers. When they finally came up for air. They were alone and it was well past lunchtime.

"Weren't we going to do some sketching this afternoon?" Jay asked. Kathy nodded as they parted.

"The day can't come soon enough can it? Do you think how we feel will ever wear off?" Kathy questioned.

"I hope not," Jay replied quietly.

"Even if we have six children," Kathy asked.

"Even with six children, you'll still be my beautiful artist from across the sea."

"You see you do say the perfect thing at the perfect time."

"You're making me loose my touch," Jay said with a laugh as they went downstairs to find some lunch.

* * *

Chapter 12

Kathy had worried, fretted and clucked so much over her application to Cambridge that she finally decided to apply to a design school in London as well.

"It will all work out," Jay said encouragingly. "Your work now is good, the diploma is just an official recognition."

"Still, I would like to have it," Kathy replied. "If I become a mother, I don't see how I can go to school and take care of a little one at the same time."

"My mother found a way, you will too," Jay said. "We can always hire a nanny."

They were sitting on the sofa in the library at the London house. Jay had his arms around Kathy and she was leaning against him.

"I'll be so glad when we are married and all this bother is over," Kathy said. They had one week to go before the wedding and were expecting their parents and Merilee the following day.

"Now I thought all women loved weddings," Jay teased her.

"Some do, I find it all a lot of work. I would be just as happy to go to the church and get married with only the immediate family there."

"You say that now. Next week you'll change your tune the morning of the big day," he said. "You know I was in your parent's wedding. It was huge. I've never seen such a big wedding since."

"Were you?" Kathy said sitting up. "What was it like? What was my mother like? I barely remember her."

"I wasn't that old," Jay said. "I remember there were so many people they had to stand at the back. Your Da looked like he was going to be sick and your Mum was all lace and fancy blonde braids. We all went to the hall afterwards and there was dancing. I ate too many cakes and threw up."

"That's hardly a romantic vision of a wedding," Kathy said laughing.

"I do remember Riordan putting a hat on that ridiculous horse of your father's."

"Realta is not ridiculous, he just knows his own mind and how to get what he wants."

"Sounds like my sister," Jay said with a sigh.

Merilee and her husband John arrived by air the following day. They were tired from their long flight. They went straight to bed when they arrived at the house. Jay had gone to the train to retrieve his mother and stepfather and had missed his sister's arrival. By the time Jay had their parents back to the house, it was time for him to leave for Chelmsford.

"The next time I see you will be our wedding day," Kathy said quietly as they said good-bye on the back door step.

"I'll be the one smiling at the front," Jay replied pulling her close for a hug and kiss.

"Or the one looking like you're going to be sick and run away," Kathy replied she was looking at every line of his face, trying to burn it into her memory for the next week.

"I won't run away," he said. "Who else gets to marry their best friend?"

"I hope I'm more than that," Kathy said snuggling against him.

"You're the reason my heart beats," Jay whispered before he kissed her. They lingered until he would have missed his train if he had stayed longer.

"The house is looking good," Sybil commented to Riordan. "The back garden is just lovely. I think it is the nicest it has ever looked."

"I didn't know you had artistic talent," Merilee said to her brother.

"I don't," he replied. "It was all Kathy's doing. I just supplied the labor."

Merilee had been regarding Kathy critically since she arrived. She hadn't seen Kathy in over two years and couldn't believe the difference in her since then.

"I have a few gardens arranged to redo starting in the middle of March," Kathy said. "I enjoy it."

"The only problem is she wants to go to Cambridge," Riordan teased.

"Not everyone can go to Oxford and get old and stogy like you," Kathy teased him back.

"Have you heard anything from your application?" Sybil asked her.

"No. I've applied to a local college here in London as well in case I don't get in," Kathy said. "I had to submit a portfolio of my work. I used some of my watercolor landscapes, none of my other sketches though."

"Thank God," Riordan and Rory murmured at the same time. They exchanged a look and started to laugh.

"She didn't hook you as well did she?" Rory asked him.

"It was Janine's idea," Riordan said. "Kathy had me sit for a portrait."

"I didn't know you did portraits," Merilee commented.

"I would like to see them sometime," John commented as well.

Riordan got very still. The color rose in his face a little.

"Kathy does fine art. It's a bit of an acquired taste," Riordan said.

"Actually she does lovely work," Sybil supplied.

"It's one of the things Jay and I have in common," Kathy replied. "After we are married I'm hoping he will practice more."

"Why wouldn't he practice before you are married?" Merilee asked.

It was Kathy's turn to blush.

"Perhaps I had best show you Riordan's portrait," Janine said. "Let's go in and sit in the drawing room. I have it in on the wall in our bedroom. I'll just go up and get it."

Janine met the others in the drawing room and handed the framed picture to Sybil and Rory first.

"It's a very good likeness, Kathy," her father said. "It's hard to believe you only started drawing the human form in the fall."

"I won't have any problem drawing statues in my garden designs now," Kathy replied. "Riordan was an excellent model. He was just as good as Jay. It took Jay a lot longer to get as relaxed with posing as Riordan but don't tell Jay I said that."

Sybil handed the portrait to her daughter. Merilee's eyes widened. She looked from the portrait to her brother and back.

"I never thought you had it in you to sit for something like this," she said to Riordan. "Did you wear clothes and Kathy made up the rest?"

"No, it's all me," Riordan replied coloring a little.

"I've done well over fifty sketches of Jay and about twenty of Da," Kathy said. "Although I haven't done larger portraits of Jay or Da yet."

"You've all posed for this?" Merilee asked.

"Don't look so shocked," Sybil said. "I've posed too."

Merilee looked at her husband and back at the portrait with her mouth open slightly. For once she had no idea what to say.

"I think it's an excellent portrait," John said. "Merilee you should consider posing for Kathy as well. Keep it in the family so to speak. I wouldn't mind a portrait of my wife."

"I mostly draw the male form," Kathy said, "but I can do female as well."

"It is a nice portrait," Merilee finally said. "Perhaps you can show me your sketches of Mum later?"

"Of course, I'll get them now," Kathy said. She had never forgotten Merilee being mean to her father years earlier and she wasn't going to give her any opportunity to be mean to her or her father again.

When Kathy had left the room, Sybil turned to her daughter.

"We're all trying to be supportive of Kathy pursuing her interests. She has a great deal of talent. Her garden designs are nothing short of amazing."

"She certainly is like Jay," Merilee said. "I remember he was always drawing something or building something from old broken bits."

"They are very alike," Rory commented.

Kathy returned with her book and showed Merilee the sketches of her mother.

"This is my father but you wouldn't know as it's from the back and draped," Kathy said. "And this is Jay."

She had shown Merilee a sketch of Jay from the waist up. Merilee looked at Kathy when she pointed out the sketch of Jay. Kathy had a look on her face like she was far away dreaming of Merilee's brother.

"Your work is quite extraordinary," John said.

"They're incredibly beautiful," Merilee commented. She had to agree with her mother that Kathy was talented and deserved to have her talent nurtured. During the week Merilee noticed that whenever Jay's name came up Kathy blushed. She would slip into a daydream when she thought no one was watching her. "That girl has it bad," Merilee thought to herself.

On the day of the wedding Merilee asked Jay to speak to her alone.

"What is it now, Merilee?" Jay said exasperated. "Are you going to tell me I'm making a mistake and to call the whole thing off?"

"No quite the opposite," Merilee said. "I wanted to tell you I think Kathy is an excellent choice and I hope you'll be very happy together."

"I don't know what to say," Jay responded.

"It's obvious she cares for you a great deal. She's a nice girl and a talented artist. You are obviously alike. I just hope you're going into this with open eyes."

"I am. I've loved her for a long time. I'm just surprised you're being this supportive of my choices," Jay said.

"I realize I didn't handle things well when you were seeing June," Merilee said. "I didn't want you to wind up with someone who didn't really care for you."

"I know now that June was no good for me. Kathy loves me. It's very different being with someone who truly loves you and you can love freely in return. How about you? How are things in America?"

"Oh so, so," Merilee replied. "It's hard sometimes being the foreigner. They've all expected me to give up flying and be the demure little housewife."

"That will never happen. You're too much like Mum. Besides I've never known you not to get your own way in the end. Shake those yanks up and show them what a good pilot you are."

"After all the years of arguing, my brother is one of my biggest supporters," Merilee laughed.

"What about John? Does he expect you to be the demure housewife?"

"He's a dear, but he can't see why I'm not happy staying home."

"It's time to shake him up a little," Jay said. "We'll have to think up something while you're here."

"You know when you talk like that I think we're more alike than we would want to admit," Merilee replied with a laugh.

"We are. It's probably why we rub each other the wrong way. Look at the time. We can talk about it in a few days. Kathy might have an idea or two and Rory can think things up on the spur of the moment. Don't worry, we'll have John begging you to go to work by the time we're done."

When Rory joined his daughter for the trip to the church he stopped and stared at her in amazement. She was wearing the same dress her mother had worn and looked so much like her it was like looking back in time.

"You are so like your mother," he said. "I only wish she could see you."

"You're here Da. I wouldn't want to get married without you," Kathy said.

Once they arrived at the church and Kathy had been delivered to Jay at the alter, there was no one who hadn't known Tom and Colleen who did feel their ghosts had risen from the grave and were standing in front of them.

After the majority of guests had left the reception and things had quieted down. Merilee spoke to Rory.

"You and Mum seem happy," she said.

"We are very happy to see Kathy and Jay together," he replied. "They couldn't be better suited."

"That is not what I meant," Merilee said. "You two seem happy together."

"We are. We're living a good life together," Rory said. "I love your mother very much."

"I'm glad she's happy," Merilee said with a sigh.

"She's happy and you're not," Rory guessed.

"It's just that I want to work and John's family is opposed."

"John is opposed as well?" Rory questioned.

Merilee nodded.

"I was talking to Jay earlier, he thinks we need to think of something to shake John up a bit," Merilee said.

Rory got a mischievous glint in his eye.

"I'll sleep on it," he said.

"Well, well," Rory said to himself, "How the mighty have fallen. I can't say you didn't have it coming my dear stepdaughter, but I will try my best to help you out. At least for your father's sake."

* * *

Chapter Thirteen

The wedding had been held on Saturday. Jay and Kathy had left for Chelmsford right after the reception. Rory had been thinking about Merilee's predicament and had come up with an idea.

"Your mother and I are going to Chelmsford on Monday to see Kathy through the day," Rory said to Merilee with a wink. "Jay is working so we thought we would go and see where they are living. Think you might like to accompany us?"

"Yes, now that you mention it, I would like to see their flat and where Jay is working," Merilee said.

"You don't mind us stealing your wife for the day, do you?" Rory said to Merilee's husband.

"No, I don't mind. I was going to catch up with some war acquaintances," John replied.

"Good, I wouldn't want Merilee getting bored," Rory said. "Her mother could never sit still for long. I don't know what she would do with herself all day without her nursing. She would go crazy with nothing to do."

"Merilee doesn't mind staying home," John said. "She always has plenty to do."

"She does? How do you know?" Rory replied. "She has always been interested in aviation since she was a little girl. Before that it was dairy cattle. I had to buy my first wife a dairy cow to keep her occupied. I'm glad you can find so much to keep your wife busy. America must be a much different place than Ireland or England."

When Sybil got Rory alone later she turned to him with a questioning look on her face.

"What are you up to?" she asked.

"Merilee asked Jay and I for a little help changing her husband's mind about her having a job. I have an idea."

"The three of you cooking up a scheme together is going to be something to behold," Sybil replied.

"Isn't it just," Rory said pulling her close and kissing her. "Think anyone would miss us for an hour or so? Collin is so busy playing with Riordan's two he hasn't looked for us since we've been here."

"Rory, you're terrible," Sybil said laughing.

"And you love it," he whispered back.

"I do," Sybil whispered to him as they headed upstairs.

Merilee, Sybil and Rory boarded the train the next morning for the short trip to Chelmsford.

"What did you come up with Rory?" Merilee asked. "Your comments yesterday had John squirming a bit, but not enough to change his mind. I think they rather backfired. He asked me if I wanted him to buy me a milk cow."

"Wait until we get up to Jay and Kathy's," Rory said. "If there is one thing men don't like, it's sharing their wife. We just have to make John think a job is a better alternative than keeping you all to himself."

"I was offered a post at a local flight school, but John wouldn't hear of it. It is rather frustrating," Merilee said.

"You have to stand up for what you want," Sybil said. "It won't happen if you give in."

"I've tried and tried," Merilee replied. "He just won't listen."

"He just might listen if you whistle a different tune," Rory said mysteriously.

Kathy was at the station to meet the family. Jay had gone to work and promised to get home as soon as he could that day. Kathy showed them around the small town, before they headed back to the flat.

"It's quite different," Sybil said when they got to the flat. "It's so open. I quite like it and there is excellent light."

"It's more than adequate for the two of us," Kathy said.

They settled around the seats in the sitting area with tea and some scones Kathy had made.

"Merilee has a slight predicament with her husband not wanting her to work," Rory told Kathy.

"Jay mentioned it," Kathy said. "I'm so glad you raised Jay to think differently about women having jobs Auntie."

"I raised them all to believe being involved with what you like will make you happy. Your father wasn't much better when he and Colleen were getting married."

"I realized she needed something to do," Rory said. "Helping out as a receptionist and later having a small dairy business made her happy. It was the right thing for her. Auntie needs to feel useful, so she nurses. Why would I argue with it?"

"What have you got in mind?" Merilee asked.

"Modeling," Rory replied.

"What? I have no desire to be a model," Merilee said. "I'm a pilot and a trained aircraft controller."

"I know you have no desire to be a model," Rory said. "But does John know that? Pose for Kathy. Have her do a series of say six drawings. Then tell John you've decided you like modeling so well you have decided to model in the daytime at an art school with male students while he is at work. Or better yet tell him there is an artist in town looking for models. It would be best if the artist were a man. To make it really convincing you'll have a portfolio of art work of your modeling."

"That is absolutely evil," Sybil said laughing and clapping her hands. "I love it."

"I know men. He'll be so jealous teaching flying will seem like nothing after that. He might even volunteer to buy you a surplus plane so you can start your own charter company," Rory said.

"Oh, I like it," Merilee said. "All except the part of really having to take my cloths off to pose."

"It's not that horrible," Rory said. "Kathy is self taught but she still handles it professionally."

"You're here for the next two weeks, aren't you? We could set up a schedule for sittings when I'm not meeting with my garden clients. Don't worry they won't be anything too revealing."

"Let's do it," Merilee said. "I've talked till I'm blue in the face. It's not getting me anywhere."

"We'll get the boys and Janine in on it," Sybil said. "We'll have him begging you to go back to flying."

When Jay got home that afternoon, they told him of the plan they had agreed on to get John to change his mind.

"He was all for me sitting for a portrait when he thought he would be the only one seeing it when we got home," Merilee said. "If this changes his mind at least a little embarrassment will be worth it."

"Try not to think of it like that," Jay said. "Kathy will make it as comfortable for you as possible. You might just like posing."

"Even if I did I would never admit it," Merilee said laughing. "We're set then. Tomorrow we get started."

"I'll come into London tomorrow after Jay leaves for work," Kathy agreed.

The next morning over breakfast John asked Merilee what she had planned for the day.

"Kathy is coming down to start the portrait you wanted," Merilee replied.

"Oh, I was thinking we could go up to Sheffield and visit the airbase," John said.

"I don't see much point in me going," Merilee said innocently. "Since you don't want me teaching flying or flying cargo, it's time for me to find something else to fill my days. I'll leave you to visit the airfield on your own."

"I just thought you might enjoy it," John said.

"I just don't see the point," Merilee said non-committedly. "Have a good time."

She cleared their breakfast dishes and waited till she was downstairs behind a closed door before she started to laugh.

"Did you see the look on his face?" she said to her mother.

"You should have a career on the stage," Sybil replied. "That was priceless."

Kathy arrived and brought one of her books on figure drawing.

"I thought we would do a few like these," she said showing Merilee the classical poses in the book.

"I'm quite relieved," Merilee said. "It's nothing too revealing."

"I've done more male sketches because I've been able to get models," Kathy said. "I like fairly traditional poses. They aren't overly revealing. We can use the library or the morning room. Either has good light."

John returned just before dinner that evening.

"How was your day, sweetheart?" he asked Merilee.

"Oh quite lovely," Merilee said. "Kathy certainly knows what she is doing. I wasn't embarrassed at all."

She waited until John's back was turned and winked at Rory.

The following day Merilee made her excuses to John again and then accompanied Kathy to an art gallery.

"This is too good," Merilee told Kathy. "He's starting to get a little jealous and your work is quite beautiful."

"It's good practice for me," Kathy replied, "but I must admit John does need a lesson in letting women explore their own interests."

After the third sitting, Merilee told John she was feeling quite relaxed with sitting for Kathy.

"You know I wouldn't mind doing more modeling when we get home," she said.

"I don't want you sitting for anyone other than your sister-in-law," he said.

"It was just a thought," Merilee said. "After all I do need something to do during the hours you're at work." She kissed him on the cheek before she went off to see what Janine and the children were up to.

"Kathy showed us the first of her sketches of Merilee today," Rory told John a few days later. "They're quite nice. Merilee will have a good collection to take back with her."

"I wouldn't want anyone looking at an entire collection of my wife," John replied.

"It's art, you have to accept that people will see them," Rory said. "They are meant to be displayed."

John grimaced a little but didn't reply.

Four days before John and Merilee were set to return to the States, Kathy announced she had completed the sketches.

"Let's set them up in the dining hall downstairs," Janine said. "I'm sure the lodgers would love to see them. Why don't you include a few of your other pieces as well?"

"That sounds like an excellent idea," Riordan contributed. "Some exposure of your work wouldn't hurt."

John opened his mouth to protest and then closed it again. He was grinding his teeth but didn't want to contradict his brother-in-law in his own house.

"Why don't you come down and help us put the work out?" Kathy said to John. "You haven't seen the sketches yet. You might have an idea on their arrangement."

There were about a dozen sketches on chairs or hung on the walls when they were through.

"It's such a shame Merilee isn't using her training," Sybil commented. "She started with aviation when she was quite young. It's always been a passion of hers."

"I've quite enjoyed posing," Merilee said. Out of the corner of her eye she could see John staring at one pose where he lower body was draped but her breasts were exposed. "I've been thinking of seeing if they are looking for models at the art school where we live. It would give me something to do."

"No wife of mine is exposing herself at an art school," John said.

"Why not?" Merilee retorted. I don't have much to do with my days. You don't want me teaching flight school. I could model when you're not home. I'm sure there are artists looking for models."

"There are always notices on the board at the art gallery of artists looking for models and they pay well," Kathy contributed.

"No, I forbid it!" John said.

"Just as you forbid me to teach flying?" Merilee said. "How do you think you're going to stop me?"

"Teaching flight school is completely respectable for a woman," John said.

"But not your wife?" Merilee said with one eyebrow arched.

"You don't need to work," he replied.

"I need something to do with my time. You choose. Nude modeling or teaching flying which is it?"

"Flying any day over nude modeling," John said getting annoyed.

"Why thank you dear. I'll contact the flight school as soon as we get back and see if they still need an instructor. Perhaps we could look at a surplus plane. I'm sure there are lot's of opportunities to fly cargo in our area."

"Just promise me you'll keep your clothes on," John said.

"Oh of course," Merilee said. "I did find it a bit chilly sitting for all those hours in the buff. I must say I am rather flattered though by Kathy's sketches. Why don't you pick one to hang in our bedroom?"

"On second thought," Riordan said. "I'm not too sure if I like the idea of my lodgers seeing my naked backside. Let's wait until you have a gallery showing."

"Yes, I quite agree," Kathy said winking at her brother-in-law.

* * *

Chapter Fourteen

A the end of June Kathy paced back and forth in the small flat kitchen. She regarded the two envelopes on table with trepidation, took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. She had been waiting for this day for months and now she was so nervous she couldn't open them. The underlying question was which school did she really want to attend? Cambridge steeped in tradition and a classical education or the college in London focused on design and art. Over the last few months she had come to think the school in London may be the better choice. She didn't know how to tell Jay.

Jay was all for Cambridge and Kathy didn't want to disappoint him, but she needed to follow her own heart at the same time. The garden design contracts had gone well over the spring and she already had another two lined up for July with a few more prospective clients to meet with. Her reputation was growing in the London garden circles and she had been invited to join a garden club in London and had made inquiries about the garden club in Chelmsford as well. School would give her more technical knowledge of drainage and planting patterns and reinforce her reputation in the gardening community, but exactly where she would attend was still up in the air.

Jay got home from work to find Kathy chewing her thumbnail and looking worried.

"What's got you looking so perplexed?" Jay asked her kissing her quickly on the lips before he dropped his coat and satchel on the chair by the door.

"They're here. The letters from the schools," Kathy said. "Now that they're here I don't know what to do."

"You could start with opening them," Jay said reaching for one of the envelopes.

Kathy stopped him.

"Jay, I hope you can understand this. I've been thinking about it a lot. I want to go to the design school in London. I can take art classes at the same time as the core curriculum. I know we talked about attending Cambridge together. I just think it would be a better career move for me to go to the school in London," Kathy said in a rush.

"Kathy, I know you've been nervous about Cambridge all along. Either school will be fine. Your garden work has been well received in London so far. If the school in London is your choice so be it. Your career is already well underway. A prestigious degree won't make that much difference."

"You are a love," Kathy said wrapping her arms around him and hugging him tight.

"Open the letter from London first," Jay said leaning to the table and retrieving the envelope.

"I can't open it. You do it," she said.

Jay opened the envelope read the letter and frowned at it.

"Oh, I didn't get in," she said with a down turned expression.

"They used your maiden name. You'll have to change that when you go to the Registrar's office to pay your tuition," Jay said breaking out in a grin.

"Oh, you," Kathy said.

She opened the letter from Cambridge. She had been wait listed as she was considered a foreign student since she had applied when living in Ireland.

"The decision was already made for me," she said wrinkling her brow.

"You got what you really wanted," Jay replied. "Let's celebrate. We could go to the pub."

"I have a better idea," Kathy said.

"And what would that be?"

"I was thinking we could take one of the cars, and a picnic supper an go out exploring the countryside."

"I suppose you want to draw a landscape?" Jay said with a cocked eyebrow, he had Kathy in a loose hug.

"No, not exactly. I was thinking we could find a spot that is out of the way and secluded."

"Um," Jay replied. It was a trifle warm in the flat and it would be nice to go out for a drive, but then it would be nice to stay in and explore the curve of his wife's neck he was staring at.

"We still have a bottle of champagne left from the wedding," Kathy said caressing the dimple in his chin.

"We should pack a hamper," Jay said quietly, his eyes were half closed and his lips were moving towards hers.

"And two glasses," Kathy mumbled before their lips met.

Jay's shirt fell to the floor in a soft white puddle, followed by her dress. It was a warm day and she was only wearing a bra and panties underneath. The rest of their clothing quickly dropped away until they found themselves in bed with their picnic supper long forgotten. Afterwards Jay got the bottle of champagne and poured two glasses for them to drink in bed.

"November would be a good time," Kathy said.

"For what?" Jay asked.

"To get pregnant. I could have the baby in the summer and be ready to go back to school in the fall," Kathy replied.

"You want to have a baby now?" Jay asked.

"In a year from now. If we are going to have six we best get a move on. I'd like a little boy who would look just like you."

"Or a little girl who would look just like her mother."

"I don't like any girls name starting with X," Kathy said thoughtfully.

"What does that have to do with having a baby?" Jay asked.

"Xenon, I don't care for the X names."

"We can leave that one till last," Jay said kissing her hair.

"You don't mind I want to stay here and not move to Cambridge?"

"We can live here. I can teach students and do research here as well as at the university. I was thinking I could possibly get a week off this summer and go over to Ireland. There's a waterfall I've got a hankering to visit," Jay said as he moved to kiss her.

"We could go swimming by moonlight when we're there," Kathy murmured as her arms went around his neck.

"And this time my love, we won't stop at kissing."

"You know I still haven't noticed the bed squeak," Kathy said with a small smile. "Do you think you're up for another demonstration?"

"For you I could demonstrate anytime."

The End


End file.
